Amber's Cancer Support Fund

For the past few years,  Amber has been fighting colon cancer.  Through all this Amber and her partner, Tyler continued to raise Amber's son Ben, hold down careers, make new friends and in general be amazing people. Tyler is going to tell you their story but before that, I want to tell you why I am launching this campaign.

Beyond the obvious, Tyler has been a huge member of the networking and professional IT community.  He has a heart for teaching and driving others forward.  He routinely contributes to open source platforms and has been a major advocate for vendors and platforms that are driving our industry.  Through this challenging time in life,  Amber has encouraged Tyler to continue to live with an open hand and help others.  People like Amber and Tyler are what make a community work.  Now when they need help we as a community should return the favor and open our hands to support them.  But now Ambers Story.

Hi. My name is Tyler Christiansen. I've been with my partner, Amber, and her son, Ben, for five and a half years. In September, Ben will turn 13. Amber will be 37 in October, and shortly after in the same month I will be 29.

During Thanksgiving nearly two years ago, Amber was diagnosed with Stage IV Colorectal Cancer. The news was devastating. The final outcome was obvious. Three major surgeries to remove tumors, sections of intestines, and an ovary later, we've recently found ourselves at the hospital again. This time, though, surgery was not a viable option. We've fought hard through nearly two years of aggressive chemotherapy, but we've reached a moment in our struggle with cancer where we must accept that promoting quality of life is more important than making Amber feel worse in the hopes that she might live a few short days or weeks longer. To that end, today marks the day that we've accepted Hospice care as a part of our lives.

I don't want to paint only a grim picture, though. Amber and Ben have been the best part of my life without question, even through this difficult time. I couldn't imagine who I would be without them. Through everything, even through her fight with cancer, Amber has supported me and encouraged me in everything that I've done. Instead of letting Amber's sickness define our lives, we have pushed forward to help others and live our lives like normal people. When Amber was feeling better, she was knitting items for other cancer survivors. She was knitting clothes for her friends and her newborn nephew. Despite spending major holidays in hospitals, she fought harder than anyone I've ever known. Amber is the strongest woman I've ever met in every possible respect. Not just strength of character and conviction, but strength of body, too. Before getting sick, Amber was a mechanic. The cancer and subsequent chemotherapy did not allow her to continue to follow her love for automotive repair, but that never defeated her. There were difficult moments. There were brief moments of despair. But they were always transient, and her light has shown throughout all of them.

We aren't giving up. We will never give up. We are only switching gears to focus on what matters most as Amber's final days approach: friends and family. We moved to California three years ago, just before the cancer diagnosis. The health care is California has been wonderful, but it's time to return to South Carolina to be closer to friends and family. Hospice will be a part of our routine going forward. I've always had trouble asking for help, but I'm asking now. If there's something that can be done to decrease Amber's stress as we move across the country one last time, if there's anything that can be done to make our last months together as amazing and joyful as the past five years have been, we would really appreciate the help. Anything that is left over will be placed in a trust fund for her son, whom I love just as much as if he were biologically my own son. Amber wants to take care of him after she's no longer with us. I do, too.

Even if you can't donate money to help us move and take care of medical expenses, thank you for reading this. The past five years have been the most wonderful, amazing, and happiest years of my life. Thank you for reading a little bit of our story. Thank you for being amazing friends, family members, or random Internet people who I've never met before in my life. Thank you.


Now that you know why you are here let us talk about what we intend to use the proceeds for:

- First Class Airline tickets for their move "Home" to South Carolina.  Amber can barely fly let us get her home in as much comfort as we can!
-  Cover expenses for moving them to their new home
-  Offset Living Expenses as they go through these final few months.
-  Offset costs for  final arrangements 
-Any money left after the above will go into a trust for Ben as he moves forward in life.

When do we need the money?  Amber and Tyler have to be in South Carolina on Sept 11.  We would love to have enough to cover their flights.  While they are flying a moving truck will be taking their stuff east for them and a few of us are piling into a truck with their dogs to reunite them at their new home.  So the sooner we can raise money the sooner we can offset the costs.  But it does not end with the move.  So we are going to keep the campaign open until we transfer whatever remains to Ben's Trust fund.

Thank you!  You are part of something special and will make an indelible mark on these three lives with your gift.