Medical expenses for Carli

Being physically impaired has always been my biggest fear. But I suppose that is how we grow, by facing our fears, and life has a way of making us do just that. In June of 2018 my fear became a reality. I had finally filed for divorce due to an affair. I was lost. I had nothing on my own. The ground beneath me was gone. So, I went out to a bar. The next morning I had an awful feeling come over me. It was like panic, fear, and nausea all at once. I was burning all over, vibrating, and weak. I felt an unwell that was completely new to me. The only thing I remembered was a brief moment of not being able to move or scream. Once I admitted to myself what had happened, I was rushed to urgent care. I was treated with heavy doses of antibiotics which wiped out my system leaving room for bad bacteria and viruses to re-emerge or appear. I became even more unwell right after. I was worse with burning and numbness. I had a fever, chills, nausea, diarrhea, thrush, and drenching night sweats. I could not get out of bed. I was sick for months before the array of doctors I had been seeing discovered that I had c. diff. I was treated with more antibiotics. I was told my neurological symptoms were a normal reaction to the medicine and, since nerves repair quickly, I should be back to myself in no time. So, I set out to change my life and moved 3000 miles from home. I was desperate for a new life after the divorce finalized and I was left with basically nothing by way of the court. I took my dog and what fit in my car and left the life I had built, loved, and come to believe was my future. I did not get better. I got worse. Medical bills piled up. Now, three years later, I am still shaking, burning, nauseas, weak, fatigued, dizzy, and experiencing constant fasciculations and convulsions. I have bad days when it is trying to just walk or get out of bed. Good days are exhausting, slow moving, and result in bad days ahead. I had to resign from the full time job I landed after the move due to my declining health. I have had multiple MRIs, constant bloodwork, EMGs, NCS, and more. I have a general doctor, a neurologist, a rheumatologist, a psychologist, and a naturopath. I am over my head in medical debt. My credit is in ruins. Without work it has been hard to keep up on medical and other bills. I can’t afford my recommended supplements, medications, and treatments. After 19 months of being a test subject, I was finally diagnosed  with functional neurological (movement) disorder. It is not a very well known disorder with no specific cure, and by no means is a final or inclusive diagnosis, but it is a start. It’s symptoms are much like MS or Parkinson’s. Trauma can trigger underlying illness or a predisposed condition, so our search for a treatment plan that helps me get back to daily life, even if a little, continues. My current healing plan includes therapy, yoga, supplements, and and medications, much of which is not covered by insurance. I also had a minor surgery to help lessen my overall symptoms, which adds to the expenses. I am still going through multiple tests, doctors, specialists, and more. I’m not giving up! The hunt for a life worth living continues. Please help me try to find a glimmer of hope and normalcy again. After struggling (and still dealing with) SSI I am now completely broke and to get out of a very unstable and mentally exhausting and unhealthy living situation, I will be moving into my car and a teardrop camper with my dogs. I’m hoping at least better mental health with filter into my physical health, although I am not sure how I’m going to do it with my physical limitations. All funds will go to help pay off my medical debt, necessary supplements, medications, other health related costs, tests, living expenses, and things that would make life a little easier like stools, canes, etc., and just helping me get find a place to live. Due to the neurological nature of my illness I’ve lost a lot of muscle mass so I am working on getting comfortable clothes that fit and selling those that don’t. On days that I can, I feel like looking good helps me feel good and confident too. I am trying really hard to do what I can to make money with art, soap, writing, and other gentle things I can do at my own pace, but I can’t do that a lot and it just doesn't cut it, not yet. You can support my creative efforts on Etsy .  I wish I could give everyone the world, because that’s what you are giving me. Donations $3+ can receive a mental health sticker designed by me (ship worldwide). Thank you with all my heart. xoxo ~Carli~ Venmo: @carliannesunshine About FND