MaybeBaby2013 for Gaff & Sara (IVF)
To my family & friends,
Some of you may know that Gareth & I have been trying for 10 years to have a baby but over the course of our almost 13 years of amazing marriage, one large piece of our puzzle is still missing:.a mini-us.
We always thought that having a baby would just come naturally for us but sadly that wasn't the case. Growing up I had multiple ovarian cysts that would burst which ultimately caused one of my fallopian tubes to become blocked. But since I had 1 knew we had one good tube we kept trying and trying (the fun part) and it seemed getting pregnant was the easy part. The hardest part was seeing the 2 pink lines on a pregnancy test only to miscarry. The hardest part of all of this was when 7 pregnancies over 7 years would result in 6 miscarriages & 1 ectopic pregnancy. Because ectopic pregnancies are potentially fatal, I underwent emergency surgery that unfortunately meant they had to remove my only unblocked fallopian tube.
I knew it would be hard to put our story in writing because it doesn't matter how long ago these things have happened, every friend, colleague or pregnant passer-by just reminds me and hubby how much we want a baby of our own and just how lucky we would be to become parents.
Because of my recurrent miscarriages and lack of "˜equipment' to have a baby of our own we were approved for 1 round IVF on the NHS. I knew as soon as we were accepted that we would have a baby. There was never a doubt in my mind that my golden ticket had arrived and that we would have our dream come true at last. So the fun began, daily injections for 2 weeks, scans every other day to watch the follicles grow and finally on egg retrieval day only 4 eggs were retrieved in which only 1 was mature enough to put through the process. The fourth egg failed to fertilise. Due to the lack of eggs retrieved and my history she has suggested that we consider using donor eggs. The egg donor IVF cycle would also include 2 new treatments designed especially for women with a history of recurrent miscarriage.
One is called an endometrial scratch which sounds quite scary, but according to my consultant is a simple procedure that, based on research, could help stimulate growth factors which will allow a fertilised egg get stuck in:and stay. The other is called Embroygen which is also used to help create the stay factor.
So what's stopping us from getting on the fun bus of parenthood? Well the bus came to a screeching halt when we were told the price of the egg donor treatment was £10,000!!
I keep repeating this figure over and over thinking that the money would just fall into my hands, we would win the lottery or that great -great uncle that I never knew I had left me £10,000. The stuff of dreams::but here we are putting our dream out there for everyone to read *wishing* that by Christmas 2013 their will be a baby in this belly!
It's always hard to ask for help but with the push I needed from some of my best friends we have decided to put our story out into the atmosphere and hope you will want to be part of our dream because there is no way we could do this without you.
Thank you for taking the time to read this x
Gaffy & Sara
***The fine print:
Because of the amount of money we want to raise, my best friends have come together to form a Club to raise the money well because they are my best friends and while they will never tire of hearing me cry they want me us to be a mum & dad too J So we have come together and created a club that holds a Charter and a Code of Conduct to oversee what we do to raise the money and because of the sensitivity of our fundraising we have all agreed that hubby & I will have NO access to the money. The bank account is co-signed by 2 club members and they are the only ones able to withdraw the money but this will only be once the money is raised in full for the treatment. We are honest people and don't want people to think we are getting drips and drabs of money and then spending it on a holiday, a car or anything else. Our dream of having a baby outweighs taking the money and spending it on random things.
One question we have been posed is why did we set a time limit on raising the money??
Well what we wanted to make clear is that even if it takes us 2 years to raise the money we are ok with that, but I think I have to be honest with myself and realise that I turn 35 this year and with the amount of problems we have encountered over the past 10 years trying to have a baby, even with the use of an egg donor, time feels of the essence because I am not getting any younger and don't want my age to be just another factor against us. BUT we also appreciate we are also seeking the generosity of a lot of people to donate on this site, if they wish to, and THANK YOU if you do.
And finally, what if we don't raise the money? Making our story so very public for the entire world to read was a very difficult choice and even though we live this everyday it took me over a month to write it out because writing through tears is seemingly difficult, so I guess we never stopped and thought "what if we don't raise the money"? Through all the heartbreak, sadness, crying and all the highs & lows in between, we have decided that we are not giving up, because what life's worth living without a dream?
"Pay attention to where you are going because without meaning you might get nowhere."
"• A.A. Milne
