Noahs head stone fund
Donation protected
Our birth story starts on a Monday evening 04.05.15 , a pretty normal evening for me and my partner our little man was wriggling away as normal I was 38+4 and that day I was just hoping little Noah would be here soon and that I would wake up spontaneously at night in labour, so I went to sleep hoping tonight would be the night!
I woke up at 5 am Tuesday morning another early wake up disappointed no labour. After about 10/15 minutes of waking up and not feeling little man wriggle as he usually would I got a little concerned and made a cold drink, nothing still. I woke up my partner and told him my concerns and we called the midwife at the local triage who told me he was probably just sleeping saving energy as I’m so far along and if I hadn’t felt anything by 12pm to call back but they where quite busy today, try eat something, have a drink and go for a walk.
So as instructed I did all of the above and called back when I still felt nothing and was told to come in.
Now at the midwife unit I had to wait 30 minutes to be seen, in the full room just knowing what I was going to be told, by this point my mum arrived, me, my partner and mum were sitting behind the curtain with two midwives who were searching for his heartbeat. After that failed to find his little beat they blamed it on a busy room with bad machinery, then tried another, same poor excuse. They then called a doctor to use a mini scanner to see his heartbeat, nothing, no heartbeat just a blurr on the screen but we were still told this is inconclusive so would have to wait for the sonigrapher but the doctors exact words I’ll never forget “as you can see there’s nothing on the screen”. We were told to wait in the hallway of the sonigrapher while we watched happy couples leave with scan photos while my partner and I were inconsolable waiting to see our son lifeless. The sonigrapher wasn’t fully aware of the situation so when I was too scared to finally sit down he got agitated and told me to sit down I had nothing to worry about. He obviously wasn’t aware and when he saw the screen was gob smacked and apologised saying his job is so hard at times like this. So after finding this out we were made to walk through the antenatal ward again to our own room right next door to the full ward. With all doors open we were listening to all the other babies heart beats thinking what’s next. We had to another half hour before we were told, I would be giving birth Thursday at The Conquest, BIRTH?! I couldn’t believe it I have to give birth, no, this is not what I wanted, I was given a oral tablet and told to go home labour could start any time if not induction two days later.
I can’t tell you how painful the next few days where, walking around town, eating, sleeping just being told to carry on with normal life who does that, I wasn’t given any help just told to get on with daily life.
LABOR BEGINS;
I’ll just skip to Thursday 39weeks, 07.05.15 at 9am where again I had to walk through antenatal ward, then delivery suit to get to the suit I would be staying in another eastbourne fail by telling me to go to the Murray ward and not Delivery. Me, my partner and our familys all walked the longest walk of our lives.
I was met by a lovely midwife/matron who was very kind, worked at my pace and really looked after me. I waited until 11am for my induction told I would be given this tablet every 3 hours until labour hit, well at 2pm I finally started having contractions, I told the midwife who said I was already at 4cm, she then inserted another tablet, my contractions gradually increased at by 4 pm I was asking for pain relief as I still hadn’t had any, waiting for the anaesthetist, my partner and both our mums tried to entertain ourselves and calm me down through contractions, now I’ve never had a “normal” birth but our son was very stiff in the womb he didn’t wriggle with the contractions so I had a bowling ball sitting in my pelvis, very uncomfortable, I couldn’t walk the pain was unbearable when gravity had it’s way so I laid on my back From 2pm until late in the evening, now when the anaesthetist arrived at 5.30 pm my midwife checked me and I was already at 8cm, I was offered an epidural or morphine and after many epidural horror stories I chose the morphine; morphine doesn’t take away contraction pain but between contractions you’re on cloud nine and very drowsy. Around 7pm my labour was in full swing i had this overwhelming urge to push, I was laying on my bed with my partner when I pushed every so slightly just to know what to expect without telling anyone and I felt my waters trickle out and quickly asked both mums to get the midwife who said I should wait another half hour before I could push. I asked for the iPad to be set on record I wanted to capture every minute of this, By 19.12 I was pushing and my little man was on his way, my partner held my hand for every second giving me much needed encouragement that we were finally going to meet our angel! by 19.17 his head was out, but I was so exhausted and my contraction were less painful or regular my midwife was worried because I was beginning to fall asleep (what a time to take a nap right?!) so everyone was giving me sweets and fizzy drinks, I finally found some energy to push and At 19.21.55 little Noah burst into the world weighing 6.10, with no intervention Not even a scratch! he was put on my chest just like any other baby, we got our boy in our arms, kisses, cuddles and love was given in abundance. This little man stole our hearts, labour? That’s nothing compared to the feeling of having your heart burst with love! My partner got to cut his cord just like normal, we got 20 minutes alone with our son before we asked family if they wanted to come see him. We shared so many memories with our family and Noah, it was like he wasn’t an angel and just a sleepy baby, we did everything a normal family would do we just had a sleepy baby. We didn’t put him down for hours we cuddled him and played him music, the midwives came in to weigh him, dress him, do hand and foot prints and check me over. We had three midwives our whole stay all matrons who were wonderful every time they took him out of the room they talked to him and stroked him made him feel comfortable, this was obviously more for our feelings but it was so kind it really made our stay better. Noah had a special Moses basket to sleep in with all his toys and blankets we brought with us. I finally got to sleep at 3am and Noah’s daddy went to sleep shortly after making sure I could sleep. For me it was my first non pee break night of sleep, we all know the pain of midnight wee trips in pregnancy and from that night I have not had one midnight wake up! I woke up in the morning to see Daddy with Noah laying on the sofa sharing headphones listening to music in fact the band who we saw when I was 16weeks pregnant. Later that day we got Noah blessed while wearing my baby christening gown, then it hit we would be going home today without our baby boy, we made every second count until we had to go home. We got photos, a clay mould of his hand and foot, little box for hair, certificates, teddies and more in a little memory box given by the hospital but that couldn’t replace bringing our son home.
We didn't plan for a funeral, we didn't plan to bring our little wormy to his forever bed, he had a nursery for him to come home to and planned to buy nappies and emergency puke clothes while shopping, not a head stone. We were able to pay for his funeral costs but our final thing is his headstone which we would really appreciate the help with, any penny helps and leaves one less stress for us, we want everything to be perfect for him and as soon as we can do it so his big boy bed is finally finished.
Noah Tate Weare-Godin our precious angel <3
I woke up at 5 am Tuesday morning another early wake up disappointed no labour. After about 10/15 minutes of waking up and not feeling little man wriggle as he usually would I got a little concerned and made a cold drink, nothing still. I woke up my partner and told him my concerns and we called the midwife at the local triage who told me he was probably just sleeping saving energy as I’m so far along and if I hadn’t felt anything by 12pm to call back but they where quite busy today, try eat something, have a drink and go for a walk.
So as instructed I did all of the above and called back when I still felt nothing and was told to come in.
Now at the midwife unit I had to wait 30 minutes to be seen, in the full room just knowing what I was going to be told, by this point my mum arrived, me, my partner and mum were sitting behind the curtain with two midwives who were searching for his heartbeat. After that failed to find his little beat they blamed it on a busy room with bad machinery, then tried another, same poor excuse. They then called a doctor to use a mini scanner to see his heartbeat, nothing, no heartbeat just a blurr on the screen but we were still told this is inconclusive so would have to wait for the sonigrapher but the doctors exact words I’ll never forget “as you can see there’s nothing on the screen”. We were told to wait in the hallway of the sonigrapher while we watched happy couples leave with scan photos while my partner and I were inconsolable waiting to see our son lifeless. The sonigrapher wasn’t fully aware of the situation so when I was too scared to finally sit down he got agitated and told me to sit down I had nothing to worry about. He obviously wasn’t aware and when he saw the screen was gob smacked and apologised saying his job is so hard at times like this. So after finding this out we were made to walk through the antenatal ward again to our own room right next door to the full ward. With all doors open we were listening to all the other babies heart beats thinking what’s next. We had to another half hour before we were told, I would be giving birth Thursday at The Conquest, BIRTH?! I couldn’t believe it I have to give birth, no, this is not what I wanted, I was given a oral tablet and told to go home labour could start any time if not induction two days later.
I can’t tell you how painful the next few days where, walking around town, eating, sleeping just being told to carry on with normal life who does that, I wasn’t given any help just told to get on with daily life.
LABOR BEGINS;
I’ll just skip to Thursday 39weeks, 07.05.15 at 9am where again I had to walk through antenatal ward, then delivery suit to get to the suit I would be staying in another eastbourne fail by telling me to go to the Murray ward and not Delivery. Me, my partner and our familys all walked the longest walk of our lives.
I was met by a lovely midwife/matron who was very kind, worked at my pace and really looked after me. I waited until 11am for my induction told I would be given this tablet every 3 hours until labour hit, well at 2pm I finally started having contractions, I told the midwife who said I was already at 4cm, she then inserted another tablet, my contractions gradually increased at by 4 pm I was asking for pain relief as I still hadn’t had any, waiting for the anaesthetist, my partner and both our mums tried to entertain ourselves and calm me down through contractions, now I’ve never had a “normal” birth but our son was very stiff in the womb he didn’t wriggle with the contractions so I had a bowling ball sitting in my pelvis, very uncomfortable, I couldn’t walk the pain was unbearable when gravity had it’s way so I laid on my back From 2pm until late in the evening, now when the anaesthetist arrived at 5.30 pm my midwife checked me and I was already at 8cm, I was offered an epidural or morphine and after many epidural horror stories I chose the morphine; morphine doesn’t take away contraction pain but between contractions you’re on cloud nine and very drowsy. Around 7pm my labour was in full swing i had this overwhelming urge to push, I was laying on my bed with my partner when I pushed every so slightly just to know what to expect without telling anyone and I felt my waters trickle out and quickly asked both mums to get the midwife who said I should wait another half hour before I could push. I asked for the iPad to be set on record I wanted to capture every minute of this, By 19.12 I was pushing and my little man was on his way, my partner held my hand for every second giving me much needed encouragement that we were finally going to meet our angel! by 19.17 his head was out, but I was so exhausted and my contraction were less painful or regular my midwife was worried because I was beginning to fall asleep (what a time to take a nap right?!) so everyone was giving me sweets and fizzy drinks, I finally found some energy to push and At 19.21.55 little Noah burst into the world weighing 6.10, with no intervention Not even a scratch! he was put on my chest just like any other baby, we got our boy in our arms, kisses, cuddles and love was given in abundance. This little man stole our hearts, labour? That’s nothing compared to the feeling of having your heart burst with love! My partner got to cut his cord just like normal, we got 20 minutes alone with our son before we asked family if they wanted to come see him. We shared so many memories with our family and Noah, it was like he wasn’t an angel and just a sleepy baby, we did everything a normal family would do we just had a sleepy baby. We didn’t put him down for hours we cuddled him and played him music, the midwives came in to weigh him, dress him, do hand and foot prints and check me over. We had three midwives our whole stay all matrons who were wonderful every time they took him out of the room they talked to him and stroked him made him feel comfortable, this was obviously more for our feelings but it was so kind it really made our stay better. Noah had a special Moses basket to sleep in with all his toys and blankets we brought with us. I finally got to sleep at 3am and Noah’s daddy went to sleep shortly after making sure I could sleep. For me it was my first non pee break night of sleep, we all know the pain of midnight wee trips in pregnancy and from that night I have not had one midnight wake up! I woke up in the morning to see Daddy with Noah laying on the sofa sharing headphones listening to music in fact the band who we saw when I was 16weeks pregnant. Later that day we got Noah blessed while wearing my baby christening gown, then it hit we would be going home today without our baby boy, we made every second count until we had to go home. We got photos, a clay mould of his hand and foot, little box for hair, certificates, teddies and more in a little memory box given by the hospital but that couldn’t replace bringing our son home.
We didn't plan for a funeral, we didn't plan to bring our little wormy to his forever bed, he had a nursery for him to come home to and planned to buy nappies and emergency puke clothes while shopping, not a head stone. We were able to pay for his funeral costs but our final thing is his headstone which we would really appreciate the help with, any penny helps and leaves one less stress for us, we want everything to be perfect for him and as soon as we can do it so his big boy bed is finally finished.
Noah Tate Weare-Godin our precious angel <3
Organizer
AllieandCharlie Weare-Godin
Organizer