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Going Home

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It feels weird to me asking for help.  This last year has been weird, but it started way before that. They say if you have the death of a parent (or child), an accident or illness, or home displacement in a given year, it can set you back five.  I have had all of them in the last few years:  I had been the single caretaker for my mom, then she passed away.  I went back into the work force, but things felt weird.  Little did I know I had contracted an illness that even though I saw health professionals, never tested for what it ultimately was (LYME) so I was never treated for it.  The actual fever and visual migraines were short, but the extreme tiredness, foggy thinking, severe aches and pains that I convinced myself were just me being weak, were consistent. The fun was just beginning.  Then came a car accident, driver blew a red light.  With blessings around me, all I got was a bruised knee and a sore neck.  My poor car...




Home displacement came when while living in GA, G-DOT decided to expand I-295, and with rather short notice, displaced several subdivisions and a small business district.  Plenty of time to them, but we renters didn’t know this was coming. I looked into getting a university job teaching in NY state.  I flew out of Hartsfield-Jackson with my trusty chocolate labrador retriever...my mom’s helper and there for her very last words, which were to him...and off we went to a new life.  More like the next level of challenge.  While walking my dog who was sprayed regularly to keep bugs off...I only had a little with me, so I didn’t spray myself-my undoing.  Long story short-I got bit by another tick in NY.  This one was different.  MUCH different.




I ended up convalescing with friends like family in PA, my home state. I was sick for weeks.  Again, blood tests showed Lyme, but this was very different.  I felt like I was CHANGING.  My metabolism altered, certain foods began to irritate me.  I would break out in hives for no apparent reason.  Sometimes I would wheeze and have trouble catching my breath for again, no apparent reason.  I started tracking my every move...and meal.




I never got sick while eating.  It was in the middle of the night, suddenly I would wake up sick, coughing, sneezing, wheezing horribly.  One particular night, I starred at my Epi-pen wondering if I would have to use it, more afraid to have to replace the cost. At 4am Dec. 1, unable to lay down to sleep, I remembered something I had heard about a tick related blood borne illness that could make a human intolerant to anything coming from mammals: foods, fumes of the food, medicines, vitamins, soaps, anything with mammal...pig (a big one because of gelatin in medicines and vitamins), beef, goat, lamb, bison, anything with a hoof.  Again-jumping to...I got tested for Alpha-gal, and it came back positive.  This took months.  By now, I am no longer working and couch surfing with friends, doing what I could in exchange. 




Now...I have to move.  Now.  A place opened up for me in my hometown of Pittsburgh.  A modestly priced 1-bedroom in a familiar neighborhood where I could walk to many things and close to public transportation.  I found out I could go back to the job I was doing in GA, in Pittsburgh.  Fantastic!  This is truly a dream come true. I have friends to get me back in the saddle again...but I have no resources.  None.  No, I never applied for aid because I was out in the country and was NOT ready to give up on my ability to become a strong contributing member of society again.  I was NOT going to let this illness destroy my vibrancy. I wrote this year:  Three books.  One is published, two to go.  The body aches were horrific but I did my Yoga daily and forced myself to write (cursive) and to type on the world’s oldest laptop.  Now, with this opportunity, I have one thing standing in my way:  money to begin again.




Yes, it is modest to many people, but to me, it is everything.  I need air filters for my apartment and a personal one to wear at work so I can keep rolling without interruption or worse, missing a day of work the next day because of something I was exposed to the day before. When I moved, I didn’t bring much (honestly, I didn’t have much; lost a LOT to water damage in Irma), so I need to replace anything most people would have in an apartment.  I had to let go of everything that had any mammal to it, on it, in it.  All my vitamins had to be replaced, toothpaste (who would have thought about that?), soaps, shampoos, clothes, boots, shoes...yep anything with leather, suede, wool, alpaca, (yes, mammal)...so I have really had to start over.  I am a real upcycle kind of woman, so I know I will make great use of antique and Re-sale stores.

Yes, I have family, but they have their own challenges.  Both my parents are deceased. I believe this period in my life has told me how to be resilient by actually allowing others to aid me.  Believe me, that has been tough, but the toughest has been this combination of illnesses interfering with my ability to provide for my autonomy.  I was nearly stymied to a standstill when my phone died.  Just died.  Yes, it was old, but...come on-the battery replacement (and they weren’t sure it was that) was more than the phone was probably worth. Again, another blessing in the form of a friend buying me a phone (and putting it on his contract) for my birthday (which is the 6th of Nov.)  Nice gift, getting me connected, easier to network, I had my phone contacts again and that was the key to reaching out to opportunities.




Before you ask, no...I don’t drink, do drugs, or any of that.  I needed a clean background check, so no-I won’t be out spending your donation on anything frivolous, or distracting. I need air filters, apartment things, transportation costs, winter shoes (I have a pair or work boots and tennis shoes).  I already have a fantastic coat-goose down filler...I am not allergic to fowl or fins (fish or seafood).  I need to not be allergic to something. That coat was from Goodwill.




In Pittsburgh, I can get quality care for something there just aren’t a ot of places to get treatment.  I need to work to pay for all this.  I just need a little help getting started.




I never asked for help when mom died, or when my daughter was sick as a child.  I did it all.  I never asked for any of the little hospital visits I have had.  Not once.  I am asking now.  I just need a little lift.  I will pay it forward.




Yes, I still have my dog.  Many AG people have to re-home their pets and I have had no negative reaction to him, whatsoever.  Health professionals think it may be because of my blood type (apparently, some have hidden protections to this tick-borne invader) and the type of dog food (many AG people switch to all fowl and seafood for their pets). He needs a check up soon, too.  He is up to date on all his shots, etc. He has plenty of food.  I have truly been so fortunate.




Well...there it is. I am profusely grateful for anything you can do and that includes just sharing the link.  Thank you, and may you never have to go through the challenges I have.




Yours in generosity and power,

Steph
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  • Anonymous
    • $100 
    • 4 yrs
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Organizer

Stephanie Simmons
Organizer
Lititz, PA

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