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DAD SURVIVING AFTER LOSS OF BOTH HIS BOYS

DAD SURVIVING AFTER LOSS OF BOTH HIS BOYS

(Surviving is remaining alive after death)

   This is the definition of surviving. My name is Sierra Potter and the tragic and horrific death of my cousins two boys has brought him and I together again after years and years of not seeing one another. My heart sure wishes it was under different circumstances. He was actually too young to even remember the times we had spent together as children.


Once I heard of his devastating loss and how it happened, it shook me to my core and has not left my heart or mind.  I know it never will. I reached out to him and we have stayed connected since. I am so grateful he let me in. No matter how much I pray for him, love on him, it will never seem like enough. His children were drowned by the hands of their own mother. It was on the news and I remember thinking that can not be real, not realizing who the dad was of the two boys. Jackson was 12 and Jacob Ray was 7. They were living in California and my cousin Jake was living in Missoula, MT. Jake and his mom were blessed to have visited them within the last year. I keep thinking, a woman he once loved and trusted did this…..what does he even do with that??? 


I can’t stop thinking about the pain he must have or how he will ever begin to process, let alone accept what has happened. Honestly I have prayed for Jacksons and Jacob Rays mother… she needs it and so does her family.

 

The losses that I have experienced change me everytime and continue to. I am not sure how the loss of what my cousin Jake is going through could ever be put into words, from him or anyone who loves him and his boys. Hearing that your children have died would be the hardest thing to ever hear ...and trying to find a new “normal” after that, would be even harder. Grieving is how we continue to still love the ones gone, but grieving can also feel so much like fear. That breaks my heart for him every single day. He is going to grieve forever because we never stop loving our babies ...never.


To try and even imagine life after this for him, makes me so sad. I feel he needs to grieve in the healthiest, safest, most loving place and with the least amount of financial stress as possible. This all seems almost impossible considering the circumstances. That is why I have chosen to do this GoFundMe.


As a parent he will love them everyday and sadly miss them everyday of his life. I am not sure how you love more than miss in this grief-stricken situation. We are not designed to handle or process something of this magnitude. Trust in Faith... and yet I totally understand him maybe not trusting in anything at this point.


Our legacy we leave behind is the people we have raised, touched, loved, and changed for the better. Jake’s legacy was taken from him before he could leave it behind himself. Right now he is very grateful that the California Cares Program has and will cover 40 counseling sessions. My goal is to help raise money for his $5,000 insurance deductible to continue counseling. Money for other doctor bills. To have a savings account for if, or when his vehicle breaks down, money for basic house maintenance and honestly money to allow him not to feel guilty, if he finds a hobby or escape that helps him cope in a healthy way. He sings, plays guitar and I truly believe his boys can hear him ...may he find peace and some joy in the gift he has been blessed with.


I can not bring his boys back, I can not take his pain away, I can not make him whole again. I can pray for him, love on him, and try and make his financial stress of life a little easier. Most of us understand how finances can add stress to our daily life, our relationships and self worth to a degree. I want to take some of that away and off his broken heart and sad, sad soul. Maybe help him have more to life than just “surviving”. When this happened almost $3,000 was raised to get him to California. He was able to see and say his goodbyes to Jacob Ray in the hospital while sadly Jackson had already passed. 


With your donation, if you are a person of Faith, please pray for Jake and his family. For a brokenhearted and devastated dad who has lost his sons, a grandma and grandpa who have lost their grandsons, for aunts and uncles who have lost their nephews, for cousin’s who have lost their cousins, for friends who have lost their friends, and for students who have lost their classmates. Any amount will be gratefully and sincerely appreciated from the bottom of my heart.


Jake Telnas can be Googled and his name is “news” that you can read about. I hope he is thought of and respected still as a Dad to his boys, a Son, a Brother, an Uncle, a Cousin, a Boyfriend, a Friend, and a Co-worker. He is a person that is still worthy of joy in his life and a person with a heart, mind, and soul. He absolutely amazes me everyday that he gets up and survives. My hope is that he accepts the tools from counseling to cope and lets the ones who love him keep loving him. That he can trust, love and forgive himself, and hopefully with Faith or something, be able to have days of “living” not just “remaining alive” by surviving. He makes me want to be a better person.


“The longest walk home that a parent will ever take, is the one after their children have ran ahead of them.” God Bless you Jackson and Jacob Ray.
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Donations 

  • Andria Weiss
    • $50 
    • 4 yrs
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Organizer and beneficiary

Sierra Potter
Organizer
Missoula, MT
Jacob T Telnas
Beneficiary

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