Help Me Live My Best, Most Useless Life!

Hey there, generous (and hopefully slightly reckless) philanthropists!

I come to you today with a mission—no, a dream. A dream of waking up every morning without an alarm clock. A dream of sipping expensive coffee while watching people in suits stress over emails. A dream where my biggest responsibility is deciding whether to nap before or after brunch.

Unfortunately, society insists that I must work to afford these luxuries. But what if… hear me out… you just gave me money instead? Not for a business idea. Not for a medical emergency. Just because I deserve to vibe in peace.

Your donation will go toward important causes such as:

✔️ Avoiding employment

✔️ Premium streaming services (because I shouldn’t suffer through ads)

✔️ Spontaneous vacations (because I hear Bali is nice this time of year)

✔️ Fancy cheeses (because I refuse to live a cheddar-only existence)

With your support, I can live my best, most useless life. And in return, I promise to send good vibes and possibly name a cocktail after you at some beach bar in the Maldives.

Click that DONATE button now and become part of something truly pointless yet beautiful.

Much love (and no hard work),

Jayson