Shirley Miller burial / roof repair

I don't believe in hand outs or abusing the system, but after experiencing one emergency after another, and time and urgency being a factor, I am devastated to have to ask for help and support from my community.

On Monday March 6th in the high wind storms, we lost the entire back side of our roof. We spent 3 hours picking up the shingles in our front yard. My son's wooden swingset was a pile of lumber, the kids' trampoline flew about 400 feet landing on my vehicle and fence. A ladder flew into my dining room windows breaking 2 windows. Our damages were nothing compared to the actual tornados in Oak Grove, but still a tragedy for us. Since we aren't in the Oak Grove area, we can't get disaster assistance for this. No one was hurt and our house is still here, so we're grateful for that.

On the morning of Sunday March 26th, my mother lost her battle with lung cancer (non small cell). She was diagnosed September 26th 2015 and was successful with chemotherapy and radiation shrinking it to almost nothing...giving us hope. But just months later it started spreading and growing rapidly making her not want to eat or drink, which was a hard battle in itself. Cancer does that to you. Cancer does really suck! Watching a loved one die of it is just horrible. The feelings of helplessness and hopelessness can consume you every day and aren't easy to live with. You think when you know someone is dying you can mentally prepare, but you still just can't. She had gotten so much worse her last few weeks. My 18 year old daughter and I never really left her room, we were afraid to leave her alone, afraid that she'd need something or she'd pass and be alone. We had been her caretakers all these months.

Believe it or not, I had some money saved for this, knowing her passing would come one day soon and wanted less stress at that time, but I needed it these last few months for car repairs to keep the car going to be able to get her to her appointments and for the medical bills so we weren't turned away for treatment.

At this time I'm looking at the following expenses:
My mother's direct burial $6,000
Roof damages $6,000
Inside water damages $600

To all those who knew and loved my mother, (Shirley Jean Miller of Kansas City KS) it would be nice to have an actual funeral so that ALL of us could say goodbye and pay our respects, but this $6,000 amount is direct burial only, no funeral services or visitation. The cost for a funeral and graveside services would be almost $10,000 and unless this raises more than I'm asking, I just can't afford to do that and I am sorry for that. I know my mother touched many lives, especially of her many nieces and nephews who felt she was like a mother to them. I know she helped you all in so many ways being there for you growing up. Many of you I've never even met. Others we've lost touch with. This is the last thing that I can do for my mother, that WE can do for her. I'm deeply saddened that I'm in this position where I can't do more for her. She deserves so much more. She was a great mom, and it took me 30 years to realize what a treasure I had in her.

I'm even more saddened that I do have a brother who is a local business owner and should be sharing half of this cost with me to lay our mother to her final rest, the absolute very last thing we could possibly do for her, yet I'm still shouldering these expenses alone, on my own, as I have been all this time through her cancer and treatments. I try to overcome any bitterness from this, I really do, but it's hard. It's just so upsetting knowing that my mom is in a freezer until I can pay for this in full when he has the means to help with half but chooses not to. 

Unfortunately, the reality is that I have no family support, other than my wonderful children who have made many sacrifices these past couple of years. Not being able to get out a lot for activities or go here or there because money was tight and not being able to leave my mother alone for long periods of time. But they have been surprisingly selfless through all this. I'm proud that they see it as time they had with her, and more moments to cherish, and they knew these sacrifices wouldn't be forever. Even my 6 year old son was okay with this. He was her world and kept her going and fighting. He spent a lot of his time snuggling with his grandma over the years, falling asleep in her bed. She was his world too. He misses her dearly and wishes to see her just one more time. Fortunately my kids know that we will get through this.

I haven't been able to work the past couple of years being my mother's only caretaker and getting her to the numerous appointments that go along with cancer treatments. I'm applying for jobs now that I can work again, but I'm running into issues with not having been in the workforce for a couple of years and needing something fairly close by with my car being on it's last leg. I can't get loans until I have an income.

I have no time to save from a job for these 2 emergencies becoming more urgent. It is well known that with burial costs you can't do payment plans, so unfortunately my mother is in "cold storage" until I can pay. We woke up last week to water damages inside where I've had to cut into two ceilings to drain it to prevent puddling and mold. We've had a tarp and it's still intact but it did rain a lot, so with that comes this added damage and makes it more urgent.

Any amount would help, $1 or $5. If you're unable to donate, I would definitely work out a repayment plan for anyone able to loan me funds. Or anyone able to consign a loan. Any roofing companies out there willing to accept a payment plan would help tremendously. I've tried 211 and the multiple agencies for disaster relief and was initially told I could get help, but they thought we were in Oak Grove and then with the large fire in Overland Park, I was told we can't get any help on this. So I've exhausted all possibilities of help with these 2 emergencies, which is why I'm turning to GOFUNDME. I feel like I can't complain though because we have our lives and our health and still have our home standing. And we know that no matter how hard we think we may have it right now, there are always others who have it much worse.

Please only donate through this campaign or directly to Chapel Hill Memorial Gardens to ensure I get it.

http://obits.dignitymemorial.com/dignity-memorial/obituary.aspx?n=Shirley-MILLER&lc=4019&pid=185083750&mid=7367862

Thank you for taking the time to read this and for your kind words and prayers. If you're not able to help, please share my GOFUNDME link so it might reach others who may be able to help.