Voigt Family

Hello, this is Erik and Dana Voigt. It’s beyond our wildest dreams to reach out publicly for help. Please know how difficult this is for us to do. We have two beautiful and special children. They are both in teen years but disabled with Autism as well as other physical and mental developmental diagnoses. We have worked tirelessly to educate ourselves on ways to help them both get to the best they can possibly be. Being strong advocates, Erik serving on the school committee to help not only our children but others who will need added help in education. . We placed our daughter, nonverbal and very aggressive in hurting herself into residential schooling. We dropped her off just after her seventh birthday on March 26th, nine years ago. We never knew what pain and loss could really feel like until that day. Hearing Autism when they were one and two was crippling but with time we also experienced joy, simple happiness that filled our heart’s and an innocence in life I truly believe we would have missed out on individually and as a family. Leaving our daughter that day hallowed each of us out. A part of each of us numbed completely and for me, her mother I will never feel whole again. Today, nine years later she’s a feisty, motivated, athletic and smart young lady. She has words and a speech device and is a child we never would have had without residential schooling. It’s been nineteen months since we have seen her in person. She is still very determined to hurt herself and targets her face and nose. She has torn the cartilage from inside her nose leaving one nostril. She will require surgery and bone from her rib to keep her nose from caving in but is nowhere near ready to behaviorally do that. She wears metal arm restraints from shoulder to wrist which doesn’t allow her to reach her face. She has made progress and only requires them partially during the day if agitated. We fill her room with pictures, stuffed Disney babies which are her world and do our best to send what she requires above and beyond regular daily needs. Our son now seventeen and a half in July has reached a point where we can no longer control him or his outbursts. He is a kind, gentle, funny and smart young man but unfortunately around 8th grade began showing aggression and anger. He feels he’s a failure, looser, waist of life, been given a death sentence with his autism and health issues. We’ve worked hard to get him day schooling in a program that focused on social and life skills as well as working with his anger but hit roadblocks with his district and then covid which set him back unbelievably during a critical time in his life concerning hormones and age. Zander was gifted with the tall, large framed, strength full build like his dad and the men on my side of the family. He’s six foot one, expected to hit six, three and built like a brick wall. He spent June of last year in Children’s Hospital for being so low he felt no worth. This past year with intensive help and placement in a year round day program things have continued to worsen. Public outbursts, family events, at school and at home now require residential schooling with intensive therapeutic care as well. He has been at Children’s Hospital for just over a month now. Erik took all of his vacation and sick time as well as 9 days unpaid to be with him. Unfortunately one of his main triggers is me, his mom. He loves me and can’t be without me but everything I do trying to work, talking on the phone, texting, asking him to even take the trash out will almost always begin an episode. This last episode we list full control and he ran from our home. The police looked for him and he was in a neighbor’s house he ran in through an unlocked door. We were blessed with help from St. Vincent DePaul and family. Erik and I have poured our everything into our children and while financially rebuilding from the expense of autism camps, speech, occupational, physical therapies, specialized neurological help at young ages and rounds of genetic testing to try and figure out how both children were diagnosed we drained ourselves of our entire savings before turning to state funded help. This was a mistake we see now but at the time thought we could do it all ourselves. We let pride get the best of us. Now today, we have to ask for help. My family and friends have been wonderful and Erik works himself to the bone always striving to get to that next level. During all this time I achieved my real estate license but have been limited to work due to the Children’s needs but Erik worked full time and achieved his Bachelor’s Degree in Management and Computer Science, graduating in 2011. We will both go to our graves getting our children to the best and safest place they can be and will work to do so. Right now so many added expenses for traveling, hospital stays, both children needing above and beyond the daily needs of your average child, loss of work and the very possible need for an attorney if our advocate can not get the residential funding needed. Zander will continue to board long term at the hospital until the correct residential school setting is found and funding is achieved. All donations will go to above said as well as attuning a trust for both children and aligning guardianship for them in the case we are no longer here or unable to fulfill that role for them. We live snd breath their future and the future of our family daily. This is a position we never thought possible as parents and a married, educated, adult couple. Asking publicly for help and sharing our personal lives and the lives and privacy of our children is gut wrenching. We thank you all for taking the time to read this and hopefully understand where our mindset is at this time. We will never abandon our children or their needs. They have both made us better human beings. Thank you so much. Erik and Dana Voigt.