Remembering Korey Wilson

My brother, Korey Wilson was a male victim of domestic abuse until his recent, untimely death.

He was subsequently murdered by his girlfriend on the afternoon of Friday, April 28, 2023, in his home in Tempe, AZ. What we do know about the incident is she shot him, locked up the home, and left him there dying. Korey had been pretty vocal in the days leading up to the murder, he was unhappy and wanted to move on with his life without his girlfriend.

The reason we started this Gofundme is to raise awareness around tragedies that aren't always talked about - male victims of domestic violence and abuse. Normally, you may think of a man physically abusing a woman. But domestic violence comes in all shapes and forms. See, in Korey's situation, there were some red flags that had been identified, but because he is a man and tall in stature, domestic abuse becomes an afterthought. From the outside looking in, Korey appeared to be in a relationship where he did most of the talking and his girlfriend stayed somewhat in the background.

But, the inside of the relationship looked very different. If you took a closer look, Korey did not go many places without his girlfriend. When it was "guys' night out," and asked why he brought her, he would simply respond "I have to." We would all brush it off as if he was just trying to avoid a fight. What we did not know at the time is what those fights looked like. When she would call his phone, he dared not answer past the first ring or two. He said he did not want her mind wandering about what she thought he was doing if he didn't answer quickly. When he desired to move back to his own place, she was quick to follow. It came out in the days before his murder that he did not want her to move in with him. Now we are all asking, "Then why did you let her move in with you?"

This is where you start to understand that abuse can come in the form of manipulation. She would say things like, "You never told me you didn't want me to live with you." "What about my kids, you want them to think you don't want to live with them?" "Are you going to have women over there?" "I don't trust you living by yourself...."

Sometimes someone else's insecurities become your nightmare and influence your decision-making.

Korey was a very private man when it came to his home and love life. Therefore, you had to be an observer, as opposed to him directly telling you his domestic issues.

In Korey's final days, he let it be known that physical abuse was happening. As the trial begins, more stories will come out, and we hope to have a clearer picture of how much he was hiding. What I do know, is that she punched him in the nose a few weeks before the murder. I told him to leave the home because I did not want the police called on him, and him accused of being the aggressor. In hindsight, he should have called the police on her for the harm she had caused him. He said, "Yea I'm leaving, I already have an ice pack on the back of my head." I didn't ask any further questions about his injuries or the physical abuse but wanted him to just get far away from her.

I hope as you read through this story, you see all the flaws in our reaction to his situation. We are often looking through the wrong lens when men are in abusive, manipulative, unsafe situations with women. Let my brother's life be a lesson and a story that can be shared to empower you to recognize early signs of abuse, and intervene before it's too late for someone you love and care about.

Korey was an amazing, generous, and kind person with such a big heart. Although he had no biological kids of his own he took the responsibility of raising children into thoughtful and respectful adults very seriously. He is adored by the children in his life, from the ones in his home to his nieces and nephews, to his friends' kids who called him Uncle. He was everyone's favorite! He was the youngest out of all of his siblings, but it's hard to tell because he moved with such confidence and authority, you might confuse him as an older child until you see him cuddling with his Momma.

Korey graduated from Arizona State University with a Bachelor's degree in Interdisciplinary Studies. He had a focus on African history and it showed. Korey was definitely an intellectual and could give master classes on subjects like Ancient Egypt, The Dead Sea Scrolls, and the early civilizations of the world. He loved to play basketball (claims to be the best of his brothers), was a great bowler, and was an avid fan of the Denver Broncos. He enjoyed reading, watching and critiquing movies for hours on end, and spending time with loved ones. One of his favorite things I will miss about him is when he would grab you by your shoulders look you in your eyes, and say, "Hey, I love you."

We don't have a plan as of yet for the money raised. But whether it be contributing to charities or creating resources and wellness programs to support male survivors of domestic violence, my hope is that we can make a change in our minds about domestic violence and abuse, as well as the importance of mental health. This will help keep the memory of my brother and his name alive, Korey (Yos) Wilson.

With love and appreciation for your support,

His big brother (or older little brother as he called me) Keith

(and his huge circle of friends and family who loved him so much)

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