Help Overcome Disability and Financial Hardship

This is simple, but complicated. I'm a 54-year-old man who's been struggling with Chronic Pain for 31 years due to Inoperable Spinal Damage. (Spondylolisthesis). In the mid 1990's I saw a half-dozen doctors, none of whom could diagnose my condition.

Then, in 2005 I developed a massive infection that scared me badly. My Doctor told me it was due to now being a Type-2 Diabetic.

In 2008, I married for the 1st time, but the consequences & problems caused by my disability started almost immediately. I should make it clear, although I did not know the cause of my Chronic Pain, I made no secret of it & tried to be as explicit as I could so there were no hidden surprises.

Long story short- After seen another half-dozen doctors from 2009-2012 & still not finding what the source of my pain was (Which was now so bad I could not work) By 2013, it hurt so badly that everything below the waist was on fire, all the time, 24/7. For months my life consisted of laying on the couch, trying to find the least painful position, trying not to cry, failing, passing out from exhaustion, wash, rinse, repeat.

Then, during a period of less pain, my Wife suggested I see her Chiropractor & he found my condition in 20 minutes flat. From that point on (Late Spring, 2013) I could now pursue actual pain management. However, though various pain doctors would see me, they would eventually tell me that my condition was too severe & refer me to someone else. This happened 4 times from 2013-2015, until I finally found a Pain Doc whom I could stay with & I have been there since.

Much of what has occurred over the course of these years, I have been warned I will face serious negative consequences for, if not be outright punished. Maybe even saying *that* is considered 'too much'.

But moving on, in December of 2016, my Right Foot went Septic, which nearly killed me. The surgeon tried to do me a favor by keeping the foot, but I was given inadequate antibiotics, so developed a lethal bone infection (Osteomyelitis.) Which nearly did me in again. After another round of sugery in early 2017, I was put on another round of more powerful antibiotics, which seemed to work, but all they did was drive the infection underground.

My Foot refused to heal and I could not walk on it at all without it turning into a bloody mess. So, from 2017-2020, I was confined to a wheelchair or my recliner. This meant that all the years I'd spent trying to build my body up, to be healthy to deal with the pain & the diabetes better, all fell apart. In the summer of 2020, a situation arose where I had to be rushed to the hospital again, this time to have all the toes of my right foot removed. The surgeon who did it said that my bones were so rotten with infection, they were bendable.

However, though it took years, my foot has actually recoved to the point where I can walk on it for short periods. However, it now suffers from ugly Edema and after even 30 seconds of standing, it turns an ugly purple. I am always risking it breaking open & bleeding again because the skin is so fragile. But that's almost a moot point because all of my back & waist muscles have collapsed with so much forced inactivity. Now, I can't stand for more than a minute or two before my pain is almost paralyzing. So at this point, I am now almost totally disabled.

The Diabetes continues to cause me other issues. Both of my legs suffer from Diabetic Neuropathy, my Left Eye has gone almost totally blind because of Diabetic Retinopathy. There is also the issue that in 2016, the CDC issued its 'recommendations' regarding Opiate-based pain managment & though I won't get into all the politics, the DEA has reduced the amount of medical opiates (NOT Illegal Drugs) by 75%. This has made it so hard to find adequate care for Chronic Pain Patients like myself, that the Self-Deletion rate among CP sufferers has increased by 600% since 2016. My Faith in God is the only thing that has kept me from joining that statistic.

The more disabled I become, the more stress it created. Again, I can't really say anything other than it was very bad.

My Wife wanted a divorce in 2023, and I have been totally dependent on her for years. If things had gone fairly & amicably I would not be here, but they have not. I had no resources to hire a Lawyer, so had to use my credit cards, but our Join Account was locked from me a few months ago, which caused me to max out my cards in legal fees almost immediately.

SO. This is why I am creating this Fundraiser. I am almost totally disabled, my medical bills and needs are quite large & I have no means at present of generating any income. I had to abandon my career, which I loved, many years ago & as the Chronic Pain eats away at my Brain, things which were once simple, have now become grueling challenges.

I will say that I have been given a few hundred dollars a week by my Ex to 'live on', but with $400-500/month in Uber Fees (I have not been able to drive since 2016), Doctor Visits, Medication Fees, $500/month in Credit payments just too make the minimum monthly payments, I can't even afford to eat the healthy food I need to minimize my diabetes. I also have to pay $200-240/month in the Gas Bill & Internet Service, because I was told I should, 'Contribute to House Bills.'

Again, there's a lot more I could say, but apparently can't. In this current cultural climate, what has happened is not acceptable to talk about.

In case anyone was wondering, I have tried many, many alternatives to simple pain medication. Nothing has worked. Surgery is not an option, Epidural Injections have been tried multiple times to no effect, alternative medicine therapies have done nothing. What's going on with Pain Management in this country is a vast political issue. But the bottom line is that for me & people like me, our Pain doesn't care about Politics. Even if this draconian reduction in pain meds for legitimate patients had helped with the illegal drugs (Surprise, it hasnt), it wouldn't make our lives any more bearable.

To sum up- The consequences of my Disability has been devastating and the physical aspect, as bad as that is, isn't the worst hurt. The Body has limits to the pain it can feel. The Heart? It has none.

P.S.- You would think that our Adorable Border Collie, Ellie (This picture is her as a Pup) didn't have anything to do with this, but SHE was the one in 2020, who discovered my Toes were Rotting. Plus, as a Border Collie, she needs 2-3hrs/day Minimum of play, and I can't even get close to that. She is getting more frustrated & erratic every day. It breaks my heart, but I'm lucky if I can play with her for an hour over the course of a day.