Help Alexis Get On Her Feet

Hi, my name is Alexis. Thanks for coming to my GoFundMe page.

 

About ten months ago, I was home alone when a fire broke out in my apartment building. The aftermath left my room destroyed by water damage, and I was without a home for a little over a month. At the time, I was on unemployment, and with no renters insurance, I could only secure enough funding to replace my bed and a couple of items I had lost.

 

Since the rebuilding of the apartment, I was hopeful that I would be able to move past this event and build towards a better future in this space. Unfortunately, that did not happen. Starting in the fall, I lost my unemployment benefits which caused me to stop going to therapy because I could no longer afford it. Then, the panic attacks started. They happen late at night, around the same time the night of the fire occurred. This means that I'm constantly living reliving the trauma inhibiting my sleep.

 

I figured if I put all my energy into finding work and distracting myself, I would eventually get past the panic attacks.

 

Once again, that did not happen. Unable to find work and further isolating myself caused me to have an unrelenting fear that if I leave this apartment for longer than a day, something will go wrong while I'm gone. The anxiety got worse over time due to ignoring how severe it was, and by January, it manifested itself in a way that caused me to have life-ending thoughts.

 

Currently, I feel worse than before; as I was job searching recently, I realized that I am not in a mental state to work if I feel like ending my life every other day. I need to seek professional help and manage this anxiety before getting to work.

 

I am working on those options as we speak, but the thing I need to care of at this point is my living expenses. The total amount of this GoFundMe was initially intended to cover a few months' worth of my expenses while I go to doctors appointments. I have since added to the total to help facilitate a move as I've concluded that I must leave the apartment I'm in to heal from this experience fully. 

Asking for help is very difficult for me, but I know if I don't stand up and advocate for myself, I may choose to end my life. But I don't want to do that. I want to live. I want to be better.

 

The best way to help if you don't have the means is to share this post.

 

I truly appreciate anyone who has assisted me over the past ten months. My self-esteem is low, and often I feel that I don't deserve help, but I appreciate how supportive everyone has been to me during this difficult time.

 

Thank you for reading.

 

With Gratitude,

 

-Alexis Myles