Support family. Dad given 1-5yrs to live

Many of you know I’ve been battling stage 4 neuroendocrine cancer for almost 15 years. With a positive attitude and never quit mentality, combined with six years of monthly chemotherapy, I was convinced that though my cancer was incurable, I had fought it to a standstill. Scans on September 9 revealed that I was wrong and my cancer had aggressively invaded my liver. It is inoperable and without treatment my life expectancy would be 8.7 months. Fortunately a special type of radiation called PRRT is newly available and depending on its effectiveness I will have 1-5 years to live. Many of you helped us a year and a held ago when our baby, Kai spent 2 months in the NICU after being born early. I’m hoping that you and many others will help now as I begin to prepare my family for life without me. 

Neuroendocrine cancer is extremely rare. Steve Jobs lost his life to it, but aside from him you probably have never heard of it before. That’s because there are only about 2000 new cases diagnosed per year. This means it is not a well studied cancer and there are few treatments. It is normally a slow growing cancer, so even though I’ve been stage 4 almost since diagnosis, my prognosis has always been good. The cancer spread throughout my body but hadn’t attacked my lungs or liver. Chemo seemed to be keeping it in check. I’ve had three surgeries to remove tumors in my small intestine and colon and was fortunate to barely avoid inconveniences like a colostomy bag. Due to the chemo and regular side effects of my cancer, I’ve only been able to work for limited times, mostly at home gigs. I taught English online to students in china for years and when I am able, I do Uber eats deliveries, which combined with my social security disability income has allowed me to provide a stable, if not especially affluent home for my family. 

Between my scans in march which showed only a few tiny lesions on my liver and my scans this month, my cancer stopped moving slowly and instead completely invaded my liver. It is inoperable and even with radiation (PRRT) I only have a 1-5 year survival window. There are no cases with neuroendocrine cancer this widely spread to my liver where anyone has lived longer than five years. 

This has had an immediate impact on both me and my family. I am getting more sick each day and I’m struggling to comprehend this diagnosis and stay cheerful and positive for my wife and kids and family. They, of course, are very distraught. 

Who is my family? That’s a question and a half! My wife, of course, Ravina. My oldest son and daughter are 16 and 13 respectively. My other two sons are 15 months and due to be born this coming week. I am the caregiver for my mom (71) who has advanced Alzheimer’s and grandma (85) who has Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s. They both live with us. My brother is here more than held the year and helps with my mom. So we have a very full house and many lives will be impacted negatively when I die. 

Honestly, I am not a very big fan of asking for handouts or help. I have always believed in my own ability to determine my own financial future and hard work has never failed me in reaching my goals and having a stable home. Now I find myself in the unenviable position of needing to ask for help. If it were just for me, I don’t think I would, but for my family’s sake, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to ensure their continued stability and help them

Achieve their goals and succeed. So here I am. Typing a GoFundMe description and pleading for your help. 

In the last year I helped my wife get a lease on a space for her cosmetology work. Things have been going well for her, but then she got pregnant and our new son is due any day. As a high-risk pregnancy she’s been forced to limit her hours. Until now I’ve been able to work more and keep up with the lease until she’s able to get back to work. But as I get more sick, I’m less and less able to stay ahead and we’ve relied on our credit card for emergency months when the funds aren’t there. The sheer number of family in my home creates a significant financial cost. There are 8 of us now and 9 when Keli’i arrives this week. 

We were in the process of buying a house when I got my diagnosis. We were preapproved and searching. All of that is on hold for now, and probably won’t be an option again without help. 

My goal is to provide a financial support cushion for everyone for when I pass and also to ease the burden on me while I go through the next phase of treatment and inevitable decline. You can help with your financial support and even more by sharing this GoFundMe beyond my normal circles. Maybe it can gain traction and spread wide which would make achieving the goal so much easier. So please share this anywhere and everywhere possible. 

Thank you all again for your support when we struggled during Kai’s hospitalization. I hope you can find it in yourselves to help again now. 

Meanwhile, I’ll continue fighting. Who knows, maybe I will be the first documented case to survive beyond five years. I know I’ll never give up, never surrender.