A Life with My Partner in the UK

This is our love story:

     It was a beautiful morning in Oregon of May 10th, 2020. I had just been outside picking roses that bloomed outside my window. I had sat down at my table for a cup of tea, roses at my side as I read headlines of a pandemic. Stories of loss, death, and shutdowns. I had just lost my job and was soon going to lose my home. 

     I received a message from my sister asking if I’d be willing to meet a friend of hers. She knew I had been single for quite some time and encouraged me to open my heart at least one more time. My sister said to me, “I’ve known James for a while now and every time I talk to him I feel like I’m talking to you. I just know that you two would be good together- at the very least good friends”. Being as hesitant as I was knowing that soon my life would be turned upside down I figured, what else have I got to lose? After all, a friend sounded nice at the moment.

     I don’t think either of us expected our admiration for one another to unfold the way it did. We found ourselves online, video calling each other for hours, and talking about everything under the sun. He was from the UK and I from America. We both shared so much in common. Our upbringing was similar and the way we spoke to one another was refreshing. We shared our troubles, we shared our pain, we shared our hopes and our dreams. We came to realize that the life we wanted for ourselves was also very similar. It was hard not to fall in love. As much as we both tried to shun the idea because of how difficult we knew it would be considering the distance. This feeling was different. This love couldn’t be stopped and so we stopped fighting it and made a plan to meet. 

     I had just received a notice from my landlord that I would have to vacate if I wasn’t able to pay rent. Luckily my mother had some room for me to stay at her place in California. So within 8 weeks, I sold everything I owned, packed up, and set forth to California. Selling everything allowed me to add to my savings to buy a round trip ticket to visit James (Of course, I would test for Covid before travel to be responsible and not harm anyone). We were both nervous about the meeting but the flight date was set for October 1st, 2020 and to return on October 15th, 2020. A little over two weeks.

     The months flew by. My time in California was a blur. Soon, I found myself on a plane to England with nothing but a carry on luggage. The moment I met james felt like coming home. James had said to me, “it feels like you’ve been on holiday for a really long time and now you’re back”. Everything was so easy between us. It was so easy that the two weeks flew by so quick and soon it was time for me to go. A few nights before my departure we laid in bed and cried in each other’s arms. The pain was so unbearable, we knew that two weeks wasn’t enough for us. We both decided to change my flight to leave at the end of the month.

     Once it was time for me to leave yet again- it was the same reaction from both of us except this time I didn’t have to change my flight, my flight had been indefinitely canceled because the second wave of Covid had hit. Long story short, I ended up staying 6 months in the UK with James. We weren’t upset about it. I had nothing to return to and we enjoyed being together. It felt natural. England was now my home and we carried on just the way any couple would. Dinner, movies, cuddles, greeting each other at the door after he’d been at work all day. It was a very peaceful life together. 

     Saying goodbye to James indefinitely and England was the most heart breaking thing I have ever endured. There is really no other suitable way to describe the feeling. It was awful. Days before, we both knew I had to leave and we were hysterical yet again because there was no way we could know for certain when we would see each other again. We had come up with one plan. The plan was that this would be the last time we would ever have to endure this pain and heartbreak. We promised that the next time we saw each other would be when England would be my home and we would share that home together. We just didn’t know how that plan would pan out. 

      We didn’t get any sleep the night I had to leave. Our goodbye was painful. What was even more painful was having to walk away from my love and get into a taxi when we were in the most pain. I got to the airport, went to the desk to check my bag and process my passport, and showed my negative Covid test. Come to my surprise they airport refused to fly me because my test was an NHS test and not done at a private testing facility. At a private facility for testing they have specific tests that certify you “fit to fly” I did not know this was needed because I had confirmed the test I had taken with the airline before my trip. They had said it would suffice.  I got another taxi and went back home to James. We were both so exhausted and could not believe what had just happened. It felt so unreal. 

     After all, the hardest part was saying goodbye and both of us falling apart, then accepting it (which took every bit of strength we could muster), then being forced to come back knowing that we have to say goodbye all over again.

     We laid in bed. Both of our eyes puffy. Both of us unable to relax after enduring so much emotional confusion. Earlier in the year for Valentine’s Day James had bought us a promise ring set. We wore them on our right hands. I laid with my head on his chest and he reached his hand over and placed the ring on his other ring finger. I looked up at him and placed mine on my other hand. He said to me,“I do, I want to, my wife...” “my husband..” and we both fell asleep. 

     Eventually we had to say goodbye again. It didn’t feel so bad this time because we had a plan. A plan to save the money we needed to be together again. We knew we needed a fiancé visa, money for the ceremony and registration at the court house, a one way ticket and a spouse visa. 

     Currently we are both working hard every day to save the money we need to be together again. We video call, spend the weekends sleeping beside each other on camera (I know, cheesy)  and again talk about everything under the sun- mostly about how we will spend our lives together and the memories we have created together in the amount of time we shared. We spend our time doing things just as we’ve done at home together. 

Your donations will help fund:

fiancé visa: $3500 (includes healthcare surcharge and application fee) 

Wedding ceremony and registration at the courthouse: $200

One way ticket to the United Kingdom for myself: Approximately $1000 depending on the time of year. 

Spouse visa: $3500 (includes health surcharge and application fee) this will be when my fiancé visa expires in the UK after 6 months. 


Total needed: $10,000


     I thank you for your time to read about our story. I am grateful for all the help we can get to be together. Never in our lives have we ever been in a situation where their was a price to happiness... However, these are the cards we have been dealt with and we are trying our best to use the tools and resources available to us to achieve our dreams. We send all of our love and prayers that this works. 



Kindly, 

Parissa & James Healey