A hand up, rather than a handout after continuous hardship

Hi name is Marlaina and many know me as Marlie. I try very hard to keep my personal life to myself and to focus on caring for my kids and succeeding each and every day without help from others. So this is extremely hard for me and I have to put my pride aside.

Since 2016, life hasn't exactly gone smoothly or as hoped. We will get into that. Most pressing, after a few years of trying to leave an emotionally, mentally and sexually abusive relationship with the father of my 2 youngest children, the narcissistic household member walked out on us and all responsibilities. I needed to protect my children and applied for and was granted a 3 year protection order. There are also other wheels in motion in regards to the things that went on and I have been suffering from ptsd and struggle to go to town or to even do grocery shopping. There is appeal against the protection order and I cannot get approved by legal aid as I have too many "assets", even though I cannot do anything with those assets due to the separation. I cannot afford a lawyer for this protection order appeal proceeding. At this time I am asking, for help in funding a lawyer to keep my children safe. Amongst the many things that happened over the years, in late October 2023/early November 2023 (I can't remember the exact date due to being in survival mode and all of my days blending together), I was giving our 3.5 year a bath as he had had too many "accidents" in his pants and needed a bath. Our child was not interested in the bath, and was having a tantrum and throwing shampoo bottles at me and having a meltdown. But he was perfectly safe where he was. The other adult of the household burst into the room and ripped him from the bath and threw him naked, down the hall and onto the kitchen floor. My son jumped up and ran and jumped into my lap where my was still kneeling next to the tub. This man also has a history of sleepwalking. On more than one occasion, when we slept in the same bed, I woke up to him standing on my legs, kneeling on chest, standing beside the bed and trying to tell me that there was someone in our room. In one instance, I had brought our baby to our bed, and the baby was snuggled into my chest and I was laying on my side, the other household member sat up, ripped the baby from my arms and yelled "he's my son!!!!". I had to calmly try to take my baby back. It was absolutely frightening. From then on, we rarely slept in the same room as the other person. I almost always slept down the hall with the kids and would often wake in the night to him standing in the doorway, and I would just lay there silently and hope he would go away. When my son would have night terrors, or possibly be sleepwalking himself and would be inconsolable, this other person would burst in the room, turn on the light and start yelling like a mad-man. Not only is this person a frightening sleepwalker, but he is almost impossible to wake at night and if you can wake him, he gets extremely angry. One night, late summer 2023 or early fall 2023, the kids and I had gone to bed and the kids were sleeping and their father came in and gently took to go sleep with him because he didn't want to sleep alone. At one point in the night, my son woke and was crying, I listened for him to be consoled, but there was nothing but the sounds of our son crying and getting upset to the point of hearly throwing up, I went and grabbed my son and took him back to bed with me. In the morning, when I ask this person how he slept, he said 'good except he woke up alone', in a tone which would lead one to believe that our son simply left the bed on his own randomly in the night and came back to me, which is no something that has ever happened. He had no recollection of what happened even after I told him about it.

For these reasons, my children need to remain protected. I listed these events and many others when applying for the order, and this other person has denied absolutely every single event and behavior. My children would not be safe with this man, and the protection order is 100% necessary.

When this household member left (Nov 28 2023), my disability income had been cut off (Oct 2023), a common thing that occurs when on long term disability and I had endured this many times since 2016 when I had had emergency spinal decompression surgery. As of summer 2023, an mri had shown that I have 3 bulged discs between my shoulders, 1 at L3-L4, a bone graft at L4-L5, a bulged disc at L5-S1, and 6 screws and 2 rods from L4-S1. I sought legal help this time, and got a small buyout which won't last forever. When this person left they bought a brand new truck instead of taking their daily driver which we have on a joint loan. I have been paying all debts, and was also left with every vehicle, piece of equipment and farming equipment in the state of needing repair in order to be used. I have been left with the financial responsibilities of the farm mortgage, a joint loan, a joint line of credit. When I received my disability money that has to last the rest of my life, I paid off the debts that were solely in my name. I didn't start receiving child support until June 2024 after I got a support order. I've started trying to start a trailer rental company to create an income for myself and the kids, something that will allow me to make my own hours depending on my body's personal capabilities each day. If all that wasn't enough, I have been the victim domestic abuse. I don't want to get too much into the details, but I suffer from ptsd and struggle to even go to town for groceries alot of the time.

As if all of this wasn't enough, when I was pregnant with our youngest, late 2021 I hired the wrong contractors (Sundance Construction/Sundance Partnership/Sundance Construction and Safety Consulting of Sandy Hook MB) to do an addition for our home to grow our home for our growing family. Well, the reno turned into an absolute nightmare and January of 2023 I sought legal counsel and began a gigantic lawsuit. I have paid approximately $21,000 in legal fees to HtLaw (Holloway Thliveris) and have $30,000+ outstanding and trial isn't slated until late September/early October of 2025. Not only have I invested my funds in making the home safe and comfortable for the children, paying legal fees, repairing all of the equipment and trying to get a business off the ground, but now I am also expected to get a lawyer to represent for the protection order hearing and the separation, while also using my disability money to pay all joint debts. Having been isolated at home, I had no idea when he left that my truck, which he drove all the time, required 2 new batteries as it would not start, and also needs an expensive passenger side mirror replaced which my ex smashed by driving it into a fence post, backup camera doesn't work, stereo doesn't work and there is probably more. The skidsteer which he had refused to teach me to use because he said it was too dangerous and insisted he feed animals himself needed an alternator and battery and alot of ether to start in order to feed the livestock. The tractor needs an alternator, 2 new batteries, all new hydraulic cylinders for the loader. The hay rake needs a gear box as it appears someone forgot to put oil in it. His daily driver, the van, needs all sorts of stuff but I'm afraid to take it to a mechanic because of what I may get told it will cost for repairs. So ya, here I am left feeling abused and abandoned and trying to hold it all together for the kids.

So ya, even if you have $5 to spare or want to contribute to my legal fees for my Contractor lawsuit directly by contacting the lawfirm, every little bit helps.

This is just the bones of my last 4 years, but I'm still here and I am working hard and doing my best.