Help a queer couple access fertility healthcare!

I’m Robin (they/them). My partner Jen (she/her) and I want to start a family — and we need your help. We’re crowdfunding to cover private IVF treatment for me because, as a same-sex couple, our journey to parenthood has become too expensive for us to manage alone.

Same-sex couples are required to self-fund 12 insemination attempts to even be considered for NHS fertility treatment. In short, this means the NHS will not allow me to take a fertility test until we’ve spent around £26,000.

This is in stark contrast to heterosexual couples who, if unable to conceive, are entitled to free fertility treatment. While this discrimination has been challenged in the courts by lesbian couple Megan and Whitney Bacon-Evans, no changes have been made to the wider process for LGBTQ people.

We tried our luck at attempting to conceive DIY-style at home with the help of a friend. After a year of trying and no luck, I went to my GP to ask for a referral for fertility tests. I was heartbroken to learn that, because of my height and weight, I am automatically disqualified from any kind of fertility treatment, including blood tests and examinations.

The doctor told me I needed to lose six stone in two months to access a fertility test. No one can safely lose six stone in two months. No one can lose six stone in even a year without damaging their health. More importantly, no one should be denied healthcare or a child because of a spurious combination of height and weight (BMI), that has already been disproven.

Jen and I now have no choice but to pursue private treatment, and have found a clinic. One round of IVF will cost £6000. But this does not include the necessary drugs, processed sperm, egg freezing, pregnancy tests, pregnancy scans or blood and sexual health tests required along the way. All of this added up will double the treatment cost we were prepared for.

Just one round will be, at a minimum, around £10,000. It is extremely painful to know that if we were a straight (or thin) couple, we’d have three rounds of IVF free.

The private clinic expect these costs to be paid as and when they arise, offering no payment plans or warnings about unexpected expenses.

We've saved up as much as we possibly can, but we just don’t have enough to cover it, and we know there are likely to be further unexpected costs.

We don’t want to give up on starting a family. We know we will be amazing queer parents. Whilst the government apparently thinks queer people and fat people shouldn’t have babies, we disagree. If you disagree too, please stand with us against homophobia and medical discrimination.