Autistic Twns need hlp to get to college & jobfair

My name is Marilyn. This fundraiser is to raise funds to enable my twin young adult children to travel a specialized college and jobs fair on the 20th-25th of March, in Boston. There is a unique convention being held, which will have many colleges that specialize in kids on the spectrum, as well as employers who hire people on the spectrum. We've made all the arrangements to attend, but due to a serious unexpected expense, our cash flow went backwards this month and I no longer have the liquid funds. The convention only happens once a year, they really can't wait another year for this opportunity. (Plus it's actually over their "golden" birthday- turning 23 on the 23rd!)

They're good kids, kind, intelligent, creative-and a bit quirky, as AuDHD people tend to be. They also have a laundry list of other co-morbidities. They've fallen through the cracks their entire lives. Too autistic for this, not autistic enough for that. They were approved for state autism services... in 2014. But there's a waitlist. Ten years later, they're STILL on the waitlist. I wish i was exaggerating. I am not. They feel like they've been warehoused by society. I was hopeful this convention would at least open some doors for them. They need friends, so, jobs, lives.

Because of falling through the cracks, and still being waitlisted, every service, doctor, therapy, hospital, etc has come out of our pockets. As preemie newborns, they needed cranial bands for congenital positional plagiocephily. The bands were not covered by insurance, and had to be remade every 2 months. They cost $2500 per band. We went through 11 of them. $27,000. And life has been like that ever since. They both needed special Eyewear with prisms at age 3 (still both in glasses). Orthotic shoes. Medications. Specialists. NeuroPsych exams (AuADHD, major depressive disorder, major anxiety disorder, PMDD, PTSD, insomnia, Tourettes Syndrom, torticollis, pigeon toe, as well as the "usual" things, like a ruptured appendix after the hospital misdiagnosed, covid stomping out their youth years. Auditory processing (SPD). It's a very long list.

We have stood on our heads to get them what they needed. And we'd do it again- they're great kids. But it's pretty much wiped us out, savings wise. All we have left is our ramshackle house (which needs so much major work I get ill thinking about it) and our 13 year old cars. I don't drive a lot (I've had 14 surgeries since 2014, I am disabled and cannot work) so my car is fairly ok, when I'm well enough to drive, restricted to daylight. Hubs works insane hours but only earns so much. We put away for a rainy day, we just never expected a multiple decades monsoon. Hubs car now needs major work, which we can't afford- but he also needs to get to work. And he can't take my car, because I'm then trapped 6 days a week. One of my kids did get their driver's license, but needs a car to go to school and work- right now, he borrows mine but it's not a feasible long term solution. He's in the need a car to get a job, need a job to buy a car loop. We always intended to help him- again, the virtual monsoon has wiped us out. I have so much guilt and grief over that.

To top the week off, we just found out our mortgage shot up $300/month starting this month due the town reassessment (we challenged ours twice, because the assessed value is ludicrous. We lost both times). I've already been pinching pennies till they scream. One kids only pair of sneakers just broke (after 3 years) and because they both have feet issues, they need decent well fitted ones. They don't care about brands, but cheap Walmart sneakers just don't provide the necessary support. They also both need new eyeglasses and dental exams- last year thru a snafu they were dropped from our eye/dental plan, and while they were eventually reinstated, it took 6 months and $20,000 worth of updated neuro psych exams. And they weren't reactivated until Jan 1, 2024- was supposed to be retroactive but still hasn't been code properly, so i'm still paying down a large dental bill that should have been covered . I buy our glasses at Costco, they're way more affordable than anywhere else, but when you have 4 glasses wearers in the family, it all still adds up to over $1000 fast.

So between medical needs and falling thru the crack expenses, it's been getting tougher and tighter every passing year. We're one major appliance failure from a collapse. Groceries are an easy $1000 a month, even using coupon , sales & warehouse clubs (I'm the queen of buying on sale and i cook 99/100 meals when I'm physically able, ie not immediately post op) . We also have some food allergies involved, which also increases food expenses. Prescriptions run around $500-$600 a month after insurance. I'm still in recovery from my last surgery (12-18m recovery), so I also have PT copay expenses 3x a week. Therapies for everyone are another $500 a month. Then the usual gas, heat, water, sewer, taxes (property&car, federal& state), co-pays, etc. We seem to hemorrhage emergencies. I wish I was exaggerating, but as anyone who knows us will tell you, I'm very much not. No matter how much I try to pare to the bone, a new disaster crops up. A friend in high school once nick named me the daughter of Job. She wasn't kidding. She also apparently wasn't wrong.

The kids know housing and support for 4 adults is expensive, esp as we're very close to our retirement years (at which point our income will be fixed and things get even tougher) . With the way town taxes are increasing, we may have to move after retirement- another added worry. People on the ASD spectrum don't handle change well. This is the only home they've ever known. All my own immediate family are long gone, for over a decade. My husband parents are gone, he has 2 siblings who don't live anywhere close- one is in a support home for serious medical issues. It all adds up to a very large pile of worry and very little emotional or practical support. I always dreamed of having a large family. Instead the 4 of us are "last man standing" (which has caused its own sorrow & woe, esp to my kids. They miss not having more family. So do I.

They both really want to get jobs and pursue their dreams- and I know with the right supports, they can. That's how the whole concept of this convention started- golden networking opportunities in driving distance! It seems like the exact opportunity they need. But every time I've gotten a few dollars saved, another crisis hits. (The current one is my daughter's ESA cat. She's had her since kittenhood and is her whole world. The cat got sick in October, then got better, then developed an eye issue that we are still treating. There's still some small hope it will self resolve (and I'm praying hard because that's $5000 I do not have either. ) I've already spent $2500 since September on the cat. We're cautiously optimistic, but we're not out of the woods yet. But I can't overstate the importance of this cat to her. ) But that's on top of everything else. And there's always seems to be another thing, every day.

My kids need to go to this convention. It could open major doors for their future. I bought the (non refundable $$$) passes months ago. It's gas, food, hotel & parking I don't have. While we have a discounted convention rate room (about 50% off), it's still a Major expense, because Boston. We're (hopefully) there 5 nights. I have such strong hopes & dreams for them and feel like this opportunity is key- if I can just get them there. They deserve this and so much more, they're really great kids and good humans. They may be quirky but they have loathe hearts and just want to belong, to live and be loved. This is a chance to move towards that- if only.

It's humiliating to beg from strangers-i was raised to do things on my own and I've had to swallow a few dozen buckets of pride to even write this. But between my health & surgeries, and all the other expenses, it just hasn't been possible to find the money this time. And I'm running out of time-i have to finalize by the 16th. Yes, in 6 days. My kids don't collect SSI or SNAP or MEDICAID- they're proud, they want to try to care for themselves. They want to contribute. They just need to meet the right people and get the chance. The funds are to pay for the hotel & parking, gas & food (we have to be in walking distance, one doesn't drive, I don't drive at night-9 eye surgeries- and they need to be able to come and go easily. ) I didn't even buy myself a pass-too much $$. I'll just make sandwiches in the room and pray.

Please, if at all possible, please help my kids to take this big step forward and hopefully open a door to a new chapter in their lives? If you can't, we'll take good thoughts & prayers too. They deserve to have something work out right for them for a change, they've had more trauma, loss & disappointment in their short lives than most full grown adults have. I love them with all my soul. I don't want to fail them on this.

Thank you for reading (sorry it was a tome). Blessings be to you.

PS cute cover Pic for attention, obviously not recent.