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My name is Maxinne Young. In the year of 2018, my father had been diagnosed with stage 2 bladder cancer. This is the story of how everything began. My dad is an inspiration to my siblings, and I. He has been an incredible father from the very beginning. Once we got the news that he had cancer, it was a devastating moment for all of us. Down below explains every emotion my mom and I went through. It would mean the world to us if you would support my GoFundMe by making a donation and sharing it with the people you know and love. 


An Unforgettable Experience

Cancer does not define you. Earlier this year, around May of 2018, my father had been diagnosed with stage 2 bladder cancer. This was a huge wake up call for my mom, dad and I as how we were going to adjust this into our new lives. We did not know where to begin, from calling his doctors to figuring out how long he had left with us. It was just a bundle of questions for everyone, really. Even though we knew how much we were all going to struggle, I looked at my dad eyes and knew everything was going to be okay.

My dad had been diagnosed with cancer, and it was a shock for everyone. He was a very healthy guy, so it concerned us all when we found out the news. We had gone everyday from our normal routine, to going to doctors visits and eventually visiting a pay to the hospital for several surgeries. It was a completely different “normal” for my mom, dad and I. Most of all, it was a huge change for me. I’ve always seen my dad laughing, and being this happy guy making everyone smile. It was so different seeing that type of man that I’ve known ever since I could remember to a man who always coughed, vomited, and struggled.

Eventually as time passed, he ended up finishing 4 months of chemotherapy. Luckily it didn’t kick his butt too much. He survived, and then waited for about 2-3 weeks before going into the big surgery. His surgeon had removed his entire bladder as well as his prostate for no further spread of cancer. The surgery took about 12 hours overall while my mom and I waited in the waiting room. I sat there anxiously holding my mom’s hand. By the time everything was done, his surgeon said that everything went well, and from then on they had moved him to the recovery room. We went in to see how he was doing, and seeing him wrapped up in an abundant tube of wires really broke my heart. He just seemed so scared and lost, it made me cry seeing him that way. As hours passed by, we left him to rest and we eventually came to check up on him. He could barely talk, so I gave him a hug instead and said I love you.

Weeks flew by, and he didn’t seem to recover well. My mom and I received a call later that night saying that my dad had been admitted to the ICU. The cause of this was a sepsis infection, meaning he had poisoning in his blood system. The doctors came in to tell us that he was going to be alright as long as he had taken the antibiotics they had given him. It was a huge relief for my mom and I. When a week went by, he had been admitted to a rehabilitation facility to acquire some physical therapy as well as in depth care. He needed to be monitored quite often and needed to heal properly from all the given surgeries which was the reason he got transferred there. We visited him everyday for about 3-4 hours just to check up on him and see if he was making any progress, then all of a sudden they told us that he needed to be admitted to the emergency room right away because his small intestine popped out when one of the nurses removed his staples from his recent surgery. That was a huge mess that we had to deal with and it was very frustrating having to be there for hours. They finally sent him to the hospital to get immediate surgery to repair the wound. He was there for around a week, and then discharged him to come home with us.

When we returned home from all the chaos, a nurse appeared the next day to touch up on his wound. I was actually sick that day, but I never expected for her to train me meaning she taught me how to bandage and clean his wound, give him shots, inject his iv bag in his arm through the iv pole, and drain out his urine bag. The nurse thought I was in college on my Christmas break, so she just thought to train me until she comes back. I told her I was 16 years old and that I had to go back to school tomorrow as well as only being gone for that day just because I was sick. She told me to stay with him for the rest of the week and do what she had taught me, so she called my school and confirmed it with them that I was going to be absent for the rest of the week. Within those days that I took care of my dad, I was so frustrated, irritated, stressed, and honestly miserable. I thought to myself how young I was to even do this kind of stuff especially when it should be done from a professional and not a kid. I was so bothered by the fact that I did not have a childhood anymore, how I’m supposed to be responsible for my dad’s health when my mom or someone whose job this was supposed to be had to be done from a teenager. Even though I had my opinions, at the end of the day I did this for my dad because I love him and only want the best for him. I couldn’t imagine what life would be like if he wasn’t here to see me develop into a woman with a future ahead of her. There were moments when I got flustered and just wanted to throw a huge fit because when I had the chance to do my homework, my name would be called for something for me to do like cook a meal for him, or to change his iv bag. I did cry several times to myself because I pitied my dad for not being able to do anything on his own. He was so helpless, that it just tore me apart to see the pain and worry he had on his face.

Overall I’d say my experience with having someone you love who’s truly ill is something that’s very difficult to see. Even though it may be challenging at times, at the end of the day it’s someone you love you’re looking out for. I would have to say the most important lesson I learned from everything is to have empathy and patience for that person. Just imagine the pain they’re experiencing every minute of every day. To think about how helpless they must feel, the pity,  everything. Within the past 7 months that this event has occurred, I am proud to say that I have grown as a better person. I’ve become more patient, kind, understanding and loving. It has impacted me in a better way by showing me how to take advantage of the time we have with the people we love, to truly spend the time we have with them wisely. I cannot applaud my mom and dad enough for doing such an amazing job working together as a team. Honestly, if it wasn’t for them showing me a light at the end of the tunnel through this whole experience, I don’t think I would have the motivation to even get up in the morning. One last thing I’d like to say, is that cancer is a battle for anyone who has it. There are going to be major ups and downs, questions from side to side, but as long as you have the people around you supporting and motivating each other to be in high spirits, then you can accomplish anything that life throws at you.
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Donations 

  • Eileen Lohner-Turk
    • $100
    • 6 yrs
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Organizer and beneficiary

Maxinne Young
Organizer
Oceanside, CA
Marilou Young
Beneficiary

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