Beautiful Boi - The Documentary and Film Series©

Synopsis​

How do you love yourself when you’ve never been taught how?​​

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This quote sits on my bathroom shelf, where I can see it multiple times daily. What happens when you have the strength to liberate yourself from the suffocating grip of impostor syndrome, shed the burdensome weight of labels and preconceived notions, and embark on a journey of self-discovery through various therapeutic avenues? What happens when you find the courage to pick up the shattered pieces of your heart after losing the one you loved most, all while grappling with the darkness of your mind, the darkness that pushed you to the edge nine times before? And what happens when, against all odds, you muster the bravery to embrace your true self and embark on a remarkable transformation at the age of fifty, defying societal expectations and norms?

Beautiful Boi, is a new experimental documentary film and series about my transition and 40-year mental health journey. In March 2021, when I came out as transgender, I couldn’t find anything about older African American people who transitioned later in life, so I decided to turn the camera on myself. I hoped for a helpful, uplifting story about transitioning later in life. What I discovered was disparaging involving deeper themes of community abuse, identity crises, transactional relationships, and nihilism.

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Though my father was dark-complected, race or politics weren’t discussed. Growing up as more of an observer, I was taught independence, compromise, seeing people’s character, and critical thinking. My identities include being an older person who’s multi-ethnic and nonbinary. I’m uniquely positioned to make Beautiful Boi because I have the most access to myself, and I’m not afraid to explore. My work demonstrates bravery in sharing resilience and empowerment in overcoming adversity. In the end, I want to make films that reflect an honest portrayal of my instincts, intuition, and imagination, just like all the great directors who inspire me.

David Finch, my former Sundance instructor, agreed to be the consulting producer after seeing my work. Funding from the Jerome Foundation, Minnesota State Arts Board, Metro Regional Arts Council, and a Sundance Institute Uprise Grant Honorarium has made the project possible. Thanks to the generous GoFundMe donations of $4,158, $87,508 has been raised so far. With the 2025 MSAB Arts Experience Grant, I’ll tour rough cuts of the series to underserved communities in Minnesota from 2025-2026

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