Grieving Parents - Help Us Grow Our Family

Hi friends,

We are reaching out with a heartfelt plea as we navigate a deeply personal and emotional journey to grow our family. Since the winter of 2020, we’ve been trying to start our family—four years that have been filled with hope, anxiety, joy, sadness, and having parenthood ripped away from us.

Over the years, we’ve poured our hearts and resources into treatment. We’ve spent tens of thousands of dollars on consultations, testing, genetic screening, in-house procedures, biopsies, medications, IVF (In-Vitro Fertilization), and FETs (Frozen Embryo Transfers). After a successful round of IVF in 2022, we ended up with 5 genetically normal embryos and 5 inconclusive embryos. We went through four FET cycles in 2023, all resulting in successful implantation and pregnancy followed by unexplained early miscarriage between weeks 6-8 before we were able to see their heartbeats.

During our recent FET, cycle #5, we pursued additional treatment with a Reproductive Immunologist. We discovered that Marissa has been having autoimmune responses to being pregnant that cause her body to attack the babies, as well as multiple genetic mutations that can cause blood clotting. With the addition of autoimmune and blood clotting medications, we were able to pass our biggest hurdle and were blessed with fraternal twin heartbeats on our first ultrasound.

This was a miracle pregnancy for us. We made it into the second trimester where we were told that we were relatively safe. Unfortunately, one of our twins’ waters broke very early at 17 weeks (PPROM) in October 2024. We were advised to terminate due to all of the complications and risks of Marissa trying to keep the babies in. We elected to try and fight for our twins. Our first son, Manaia, delivered stillborn a week later at 18 weeks. They told us our second twin would come within a few days, but he was a fighter and managed to make it an additional 22 days. He delivered unexpectedly and traumatically while we were at home. Jamie held our second son, who we named Irirangi, and we watched him take his final breath while waiting for the paramedics to arrive. He joined his brother at 21 weeks.

We would give anything to not be where we’re at right now.

We are asking for your support as we prepare to continue our road to parenthood. After years of testing and multiple miscarriages, we found a medicated immunology protocol that has allowed us to progress towards live birth. These protocols are extraordinarily expensive and we’ve unfortunately run out of fertility insurance to help lower costs. We are hoping to pursue another FET cycle and round of IVF, which will average $30,000, not including the additional medications and immunology testing Marissa will need to maintain any pregnancy.

Your contribution, no matter how big or small, means the world to us and will go directly toward helping us access the treatments we need to start our family. Any remaining funds, if we are unsuccessful, will go towards adoption and/or fostering.

We completely understand if you are unable to contribute financially and would be grateful if you would share our story with your loved ones or send baby dust and positive vibes our way.

Thank you for taking the time to read our story and being a part of our journey.

With love and hope,

Jamie & Marissa