Help Connie get through her stroke
Donation protected
Hello,
My name is Carolyn and I’m writing to you in hopes of raising funds for my Mother and I.
My exceptionally strong mother recently experienced a stroke on April 15th, 2016 at the age of 52. As a result my mother lost the ability to speak, to eat solid foods, she has hypersensitivity to texture and taste, and lost all use of the right side of her body along with some control of her left side. She currently has the condition Aphasia, which affects her ability to find the right words to say and her ability to communicate through facial expressions. Along with her hard of hearing, her vision was affected by the stroke even more so than what her condition was before.
I would like to tell you a little bit about my Mother, Connie Nguyen, a single mother to Markus, Melanie, and I, before requesting for your help. I remember always looking for her in the dark when my siblings and I would ride together to pick up my mom after work because she could no longer drive. We could never forget all her silly mistakes, such as when I once opened up a sandwich bag that she had packed for me to a sandwich with 3 slices of bread and only mayonnaise in between or the times she would scramble and toss what ever change she had to the cashier because she couldn't see the difference between the coins. This was due to her half blindness and hard of hearing, not to mention all the other complications that came with her Type 1 Diabetes and associated complications.
During the first month after the event, she became weak and mostly slept while in the hospital, a crucial time for stroke patients to recover physically and eventually had completely lost what little she had left of her strength on the right side. At that time, the doctors had decided to stop her therapy until they could find out why she was so weak. This may have been due to her blood sugar being out of control because of the stress of the trauma (consistently around 400; normal being between 70-120). Her recovery had been stunted between the starvation due to her inability to digest food and her diabetes.
I spent every day and night with my Mom in the hospital and practically lived in the hospital for a month to prepare myself to become her full time caretaker. A part of me resisted the idea of letting go of my future plans to become a Behavior Analyst, my master’s program, my career, my travel plans, my apartment and then a part of me was determined to learn as much as I can to be the best caretaker I could possibly be. How would I ever be trained enough to help her like her nurses, her physical therapist, her occupational therapist, and her speech therapist?
The social worker at the hospital had explained to me our options; placing her in a nursing home (which doesn’t promote her independence), hiring outside for a caretaker (would require paying out of pocket), and then the cheapest and most effective for her to be independent again would be to have a family member be her caretaker. Quickly my family had to determine the roles of each person and how I as well as my mother will be taken care of if i were to quit my job. I as well have Diabetes type 1 and had been working as a Behavior Therapist and felt that it was in her best interest to care for her.
My brother currently is providing financially for the rent and utilities for his own portion of the rent along with helping once he gets out of work. My sister has also agreed to help on the weekends when possible. I have moved in to help my mother full time.
Currently, even with the financial help we receive from relatives and the government aid, I am currently in debt paying for the following, which currently come out to about $1500 monthly:
mother’s supplies/ medication, food, and daily needs ($500)
my own daily needs ($500)
monthly bills ($400)
acupuncture ($80/ week).
She has Medicaid, so her limited physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy sessions are currently provided but not for much more than a few more sessions. Her supplies such as diapers and bed pad liners are not yet approved by the insurance so that is currently paid out of my pocket. Her disability funds currently pay for her part of the rent. I am currently waiting on the status of food stamps and general relief which doesn’t seem like it will be processed anytime soon. The social worker has also informed us that In Home Supportive Services (IHSS Program) will most likely take up to 6 months to pay for my hours in helping my mother and when they do it will only be for a few hours a day and pays minimum wage. Just from the month of may, the first month in paying for her expenses along with mine, I am in debt by $1000 after being helped by relatives. This is when I felt that being helped by a few hands was too much to ask for this to work long term (12-18 months, the most crucial time for stroke patients to gain their ability back). These helpers too have families of their own.
Although the hospital neurologist told me a few days before discharging her that she will not be able to gain her ability back, it is most worth it to see my Mom’s motivation and the determination measured by her progress thus far, despite how hopeless it felt at first. I have seen her slowly lift her right leg to walk with a walker, speak 3 word sentences, and recently a therapist called me over in shock that she was grasping a ball only after one month of her discharge. She has also overcome her hopelessness, from feeling that she would never be able to move on her own again to believing she will walk again one day even possibly without a walker.
After watching her sleep and struggle to stay awake the first few weeks of her discharge, I feared that I would never see her recover and spend a year watching her lay in bed.
Thankfully, with hope and encouragement as a behaviorist, the prayers of family and church members, the support of our friends who sit and accompany us as we strive to go back to our daily life, her doctors and therapists who admire her strength, and possibly the financial help of many, I know she will have the support system she needs to become independent again. Most of all, what has been rewarding has been the compliments she gets from her therapists stating how helpful her family has been, how shocked they are that I quit my job to stand by her, and how on board she has been with all of her therapy despite how hungry or tired she is.
My mom did the best as she could as a single mother to help us and the people around her as a believer in Jesus Christ and now she is helping us by setting an example of how strong we all can be in a time where success seemed nearly impossible. Any help would be much appreciated. I was not born with big enough hands to help my Mother but I know that with as many friends and family as we have, each little hand will help.
My name is Carolyn and I’m writing to you in hopes of raising funds for my Mother and I.
My exceptionally strong mother recently experienced a stroke on April 15th, 2016 at the age of 52. As a result my mother lost the ability to speak, to eat solid foods, she has hypersensitivity to texture and taste, and lost all use of the right side of her body along with some control of her left side. She currently has the condition Aphasia, which affects her ability to find the right words to say and her ability to communicate through facial expressions. Along with her hard of hearing, her vision was affected by the stroke even more so than what her condition was before.
I would like to tell you a little bit about my Mother, Connie Nguyen, a single mother to Markus, Melanie, and I, before requesting for your help. I remember always looking for her in the dark when my siblings and I would ride together to pick up my mom after work because she could no longer drive. We could never forget all her silly mistakes, such as when I once opened up a sandwich bag that she had packed for me to a sandwich with 3 slices of bread and only mayonnaise in between or the times she would scramble and toss what ever change she had to the cashier because she couldn't see the difference between the coins. This was due to her half blindness and hard of hearing, not to mention all the other complications that came with her Type 1 Diabetes and associated complications.
During the first month after the event, she became weak and mostly slept while in the hospital, a crucial time for stroke patients to recover physically and eventually had completely lost what little she had left of her strength on the right side. At that time, the doctors had decided to stop her therapy until they could find out why she was so weak. This may have been due to her blood sugar being out of control because of the stress of the trauma (consistently around 400; normal being between 70-120). Her recovery had been stunted between the starvation due to her inability to digest food and her diabetes.
I spent every day and night with my Mom in the hospital and practically lived in the hospital for a month to prepare myself to become her full time caretaker. A part of me resisted the idea of letting go of my future plans to become a Behavior Analyst, my master’s program, my career, my travel plans, my apartment and then a part of me was determined to learn as much as I can to be the best caretaker I could possibly be. How would I ever be trained enough to help her like her nurses, her physical therapist, her occupational therapist, and her speech therapist?
The social worker at the hospital had explained to me our options; placing her in a nursing home (which doesn’t promote her independence), hiring outside for a caretaker (would require paying out of pocket), and then the cheapest and most effective for her to be independent again would be to have a family member be her caretaker. Quickly my family had to determine the roles of each person and how I as well as my mother will be taken care of if i were to quit my job. I as well have Diabetes type 1 and had been working as a Behavior Therapist and felt that it was in her best interest to care for her.
My brother currently is providing financially for the rent and utilities for his own portion of the rent along with helping once he gets out of work. My sister has also agreed to help on the weekends when possible. I have moved in to help my mother full time.
Currently, even with the financial help we receive from relatives and the government aid, I am currently in debt paying for the following, which currently come out to about $1500 monthly:
mother’s supplies/ medication, food, and daily needs ($500)
my own daily needs ($500)
monthly bills ($400)
acupuncture ($80/ week).
She has Medicaid, so her limited physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy sessions are currently provided but not for much more than a few more sessions. Her supplies such as diapers and bed pad liners are not yet approved by the insurance so that is currently paid out of my pocket. Her disability funds currently pay for her part of the rent. I am currently waiting on the status of food stamps and general relief which doesn’t seem like it will be processed anytime soon. The social worker has also informed us that In Home Supportive Services (IHSS Program) will most likely take up to 6 months to pay for my hours in helping my mother and when they do it will only be for a few hours a day and pays minimum wage. Just from the month of may, the first month in paying for her expenses along with mine, I am in debt by $1000 after being helped by relatives. This is when I felt that being helped by a few hands was too much to ask for this to work long term (12-18 months, the most crucial time for stroke patients to gain their ability back). These helpers too have families of their own.
Although the hospital neurologist told me a few days before discharging her that she will not be able to gain her ability back, it is most worth it to see my Mom’s motivation and the determination measured by her progress thus far, despite how hopeless it felt at first. I have seen her slowly lift her right leg to walk with a walker, speak 3 word sentences, and recently a therapist called me over in shock that she was grasping a ball only after one month of her discharge. She has also overcome her hopelessness, from feeling that she would never be able to move on her own again to believing she will walk again one day even possibly without a walker.
After watching her sleep and struggle to stay awake the first few weeks of her discharge, I feared that I would never see her recover and spend a year watching her lay in bed.
Thankfully, with hope and encouragement as a behaviorist, the prayers of family and church members, the support of our friends who sit and accompany us as we strive to go back to our daily life, her doctors and therapists who admire her strength, and possibly the financial help of many, I know she will have the support system she needs to become independent again. Most of all, what has been rewarding has been the compliments she gets from her therapists stating how helpful her family has been, how shocked they are that I quit my job to stand by her, and how on board she has been with all of her therapy despite how hungry or tired she is.
My mom did the best as she could as a single mother to help us and the people around her as a believer in Jesus Christ and now she is helping us by setting an example of how strong we all can be in a time where success seemed nearly impossible. Any help would be much appreciated. I was not born with big enough hands to help my Mother but I know that with as many friends and family as we have, each little hand will help.
Organizer
Carolyn Nguyen
Organizer
San Gabriel, CA