Connory's Financial Recovery & Artistic Future

As u may or may not know, internet friends + strangers:

My name is Connory Ballantyne + I am an artist living in Montreal, Quebec, Canada. I have been making music in bands, directing music videos, shooting photos, and graphic designing as a young freelance creative director for the past 10 years. I am struggling financially and struggling to find a job. I am asking for help.

A quick flashback to set the scene:

During the pandemic, I sold my VW Jetta and bought an electric bike. A RadRunner2 to be precise. This helped keep my mobility without the gas costs- I wanted to save as much as I could while I was out of work & able to collect CERB. I saved enough so that when our landlord asked us to move out of our house in my hometown of Barrie, ON so he could move in- I decided to move out of my small town into a big city to pursue more opportunities.

This decision to buy an electric bike literally saved my life when I took the leap to move to Montreal during lockdowns. I found my inability to speak French- and an extreme difficulty pinning down exactly “what i do”- inhibiting my traditional job hunt. I have a formidably solid resume- having just finished my stint as national artistic director for a musician's non-for-profit and spending my early 20's as the co-founder and creative director of a music label. But I am so far from being “specialized”- it’s painful how many jobs I have been passed on because of my lack of a diploma (I have no post-secondary education, I went right into my career out of high school) or general confusion over why my skill set includes music engineering AND theatrical lighting/sound design AND graphic design AND photography AND... juggling?!

So: I began surviving off of daily Uber Eats delivery expeditions on my ebike. I have been delivering now for over 2 years while continually hunting for a steady job + doing creative projects on the side.

Soon after my move here however, my bike was stolen and broken (the first time back in summer 2022)- I fell into debt trying to pay bills while I attempted to keep finding work/fix my bike. After a painful few summer months or so of waiting for parts to be delivered (thx post-pandemic supply chain) and waiting for a callback for a job- I had amassed no small chunk of debt. Without a steady job and relying on Uber's often fickle lucrativeness- I have been living off an average income of $1500 a month from delivering 6hrs a day plus a bit of freelance work filling in the gaps best it can. My average monthly expenses for housing/bills is around $1600. Can someone do the math (it’s the one thing im bad at! ok addendum- plz add ‘speaking French’ to that list aussi). Needless to say- this debt has significantly impacted my life- going from a 810 credit score and absolutely no debt at all in 2021 to a 680 score & just over 10k worth of credit card debt in 2023 hurts. Bad.

That debt is difficult to contend with as someone who has grown up with the enormously healthy “do not be beholden to debt/pay it off immediately/don’t buy it if you don’t have the money rn” ethos drilled into me. My parents taught me how to budget extremely well and have aided in small and meaningful ways. But my parents are also not wealthy in any way that the world cares about (monetarily, their treasures are sure to be mountainous in heaven). And I’m a young man who normally has the ability to sort out messes I have found myself in. So most of my financial burdens have been dealt with by cutting expenses to virtually zero for the past two years, and being somewhat of a recluse over the past year (people and events are expensive). The exception being made only for my trips out of town to work on music/photo projects- during which I appreciate the aid from those who have invited me to escape my hermitage + touch grass/work on cool art.

I have made extremely huge leaps in my artistic career this year living in the city of Montreal. I started shooting photos professionally. I had my work published in print for the first time. Began shooting concerts- another first. I was asked to shoot projects for some of the country's best indie artists, I designed covers and world tour posters for Polaris Prize bands like ZOON, shot portraits for Rick Owen's own Anna Maria Varriano, platinum producer NKY, PAPER Magazine Editor-in-Chief Mickey Boardman. Made music and shot a profile on actor/comedian Veronika Slowikowska. I got to shoot events for up and coming director Michael Reese, fashion editorials for Ligne De Fuite, and New York streetwear company DYBBUK & Trampoline. Things are looking up, opportunities are opening in my career.

I have plans to begin a photo project I really love that will culminate in my first book published next year. I have begun an ongoing experimental fiction-writing project via an Instagram account that I am excited to reveal soon. I have had 30+ scripts written for over a year for a Youtube series teaching young visual artists and musicians to understand the philosophy behind the process of art-making and not just the mechanics alone. I have 2 really special bands, both with albums ready to record when I find the time and resources. I cannot wait to share all this with the world. I make art because I truly believe it is the way we shake and shift culture. To create beauty, hope, and a revelation of truth. I want people who encounter my work to feel like there's something more- transcendence: see beyond the veil - as my dad said.

But this debt looms. The credit card interest rates eat up over 500-600$ CAD a month alone. What could have been a monthly payment towards my savings, projects, and groceries is used to keep the ship barely above sea level. Without this debt haemorrhaging, I would even be comfortable financially by freelancing full time and delivering- still below poverty line, but I am used to extreme budgeting for the sake of continuing to do work I love with the people I love.

Ultimately, after my bike was stolen again a few days ago (it was found gutted, cables cut, all accessories torn off, locks cut/stolen, and rendered unridable- unless I can magic $800 for replacement parts) and with my savings emptied: I am in a predicament most humbling. Really honestly. This is Connory speaking from my heart. I need help to regain control of this ship.

I believe I can do some amazing things, but this constant financial weight makes even the prospect of creative work seem hopeless. I've been fighting- both to find work and for my Work- for years.

What does all this have to do with you tho? Maybe nothing! If you’re a starry-eyed, obsessively vision-centric, artist with a capital A like myself- it most certainly means nothing at all. I love you + you probably have enough to deal with trying to survive yourself that I am just happy to call you an acquaintance/friend/colleague.

Quite honestly this is all my burden to bear. I know this - 2 Thessalonians 3:10.

...

But- on the incredible chance that somewhere out there is some friend’s wonderful rich auntie who would like to invest in a young artist's future in the arts world by helping right the financial sinking ship in his life- I am humbled and gracious to you.

I have set up this GoFundMe to be as reciprocal as I can afford. I don't fully feel like I deserve free hand-outs, that's my ego speakin'. So I am hoping you message me with something I could help you with that suits your own vision for your work. Check my Instagram highlight for more info. And if you want to donate without a gift, just know I am so incredibly grateful for you.

The money raised will go towards the following immediate needs:

1. Paying for bike repairs - totalling around $800. This will help me get back to Uber delivering and keeping food on the table immediately.

2. Rent - $1300. This month's and maybe next month's rent was made impossible due to my bike theft/damage. Immediate need.

Pie-in-the-sky hopes:

3. Wiping out my moving/bills/out-of-work induced debt- totalling $10, 340. This will help me put the money I make towards my future and my career at last, instead of my past. The anxiety and creative freedom to not be paying that interest payment would be life-changing.

4. Saving for future projects. Any extra will go towards my artistic path moving forward. Essentially an investment in my work and career. An upcoming photography book, recording new music, and funding my vision for an educational channel on music production tutorials, AI, art philosophy, the experience of creating cohesive content for artists, photography, etc. A move to Japan or NYC for a year is something worth saving for too.

Anyways- thx 4 reading all that + would someone plz hire me. <3