The Wiseman Family

Dear Friends, Family, and Colleagues,

For many of you it has been quite a long time since last you heard from me, and for that, I do apologize.  Despite the prolonged absence of communication, I would like to humbly request that everyone believe me that each and every one of you have consistently been in my thoughts throughout the years.

Life takes us down many roads; some with many turns, tunnels, gorgeous mountain vistas, supple curves draped in coastal mists, endless straights extending all the way to the horizon; this list could go on near infinitely.

Thankfully, the roads of my life have led me to my family, which, for those of you who were not privy to the fact – I have always wanted more than anything else.  I am proud to tell you of my beautiful, wonderful, intelligent, caring, thoughtful, special, one of a kind wife Pam.  I am also proud to tell you of my 11 year old stepson Eli, who, since the day I met him has never ceased to impress, surprise, and amaze me with his wit, inquisitiveness, quirky and rather odd sense of humor, and intellect.

There is more to Eli though.  He possesses a most unique gift, a quality of character which words may do nothing more than approximate.  To all those reading, please hear me now – this child is blessed with what can only be termed, “A Golden Soul," which was immediately apparent to me within minutes of meeting him for the first time.  I have never encountered a more caring, compassionate, empathetic, altruistic, and loving child (or, adult for that matter).  I have personally witnessed times when this child has felt so much, so intensely, for his friends and/or family, that he was visibly in pain due to his concern for others.  And folks, at this very moment, Eli is in excruciating pain due to the worry he feels for his mother.

Out of respect for Pam, both as my wife and as an individual, I will intentionally keep her Medical needs vague and abridged.  With this in mind, for those of you who may be unaware, I have worked as a Physician Assistant, specializing in Psychiatry, since graduating PA school in 2016.  I have worked almost exclusively in high acuity, emergency and inpatient psychiatric hospital settings.  Additionally, I was most recently the primary psychiatry provider on a specialized inpatient unit dedicated to severe military trauma.  During this time I have treated literally thousands of patients.

As much as it pains me to my core to express this truth, Pam’s particular needs, which fall into the above-mentioned domain, are the most severe of any patient I have ever encountered.  The history (read: the sources/causes of Pam’s illness), her symptoms, the devastating effects those symptoms have had on our family, the heart wrenching pain that I have, in abject horror, watched Pam experience time and time again due to her illness, and the changes I have observed in our little cherub, Golden Souled Eli, have profoundly and permanently altered the course of our lives.

Pam’s doctors have recommended a lengthy course of treatment in a residential setting, the cost of which is on the order of tens of thousands of dollars per month.  Based on the current recommendations from her Treatment Team, Pam’s prognosis will be remarkably bleak without this treatment.  To be frank, which I am obliged to be as part of my responsibility to my family – without this treatment Pam and Eli's lives will continue to be plagued by an endless series of nightmarish episodes and constant misery. In addition, and I could not mean this more wholeheartedly and sincerely – not only would they suffer, but the world would miss out on the endless gifts that Pam and Eli have to give to the world, as they are truly that spectacular and have that much to offer.

As a result of Pam’s illness – which I MUST take a moment to make absolutely, positively clear, is of NO fault of her own – our family is in a state of crisis, truly dire straits.  I recently had to step down from my position on said specialized military unit, as I was unable to simultaneously meet the needs of both my patients and my family.  Due to the chronic, and more recently, acutely severe, nature of Pam’s illness, I have not been able to return to work.  Pam herself has been unable to work nor complete the first semester of her Master’s program this fall.  Our savings is entirely depleted, and we are undeniably without any other options.

My time working inpatient psychiatry has exposed me to some of the worst pain, anguish, and hardship any person could possibly endure.  It has allowed me to directly observe, and, if I was lucky, directly influence remarkable and incredibly uplifting success stories.  Additionally, after much introspection and self-reflection, I have come to realize that it has also afforded me the opportunity to recognize and understand, on a deep, humanistic, inherently true, near-mystical level – that everyone needs help sometimes.  And that is OK.

Folks, my family needs help, I mean we really need help.  Without the intervention of this campaign, Pam receiving the treatment she is desperately needs is an impossibility.  That is the plain and simple truth of the matter.  On behalf of my family, which I cherish and hold as close to my heart as anything has ever been held in the history of hearts and things, I humbly, and respectfully ask for your help.  With the same humility and respect, I also ask that you please consider passing this message on to as many people as you may wish, so as to spread the word of our need.

In closing, I would like to take the opportunity to thank all of those who have been so kind as to the time out of their busy Holiday season to read of our situation.  Also, to thank in advance those who may choose to help our family.  We thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

P.S. To everyone – please do not hesitate to reach out to me directly via text, phone, and/or email, I would love to reconnect with those who I have lost touch with along the way. After all, “Every silver lining has a touch of grey,” and a little grey is rarely a bad thing.