Donate in Memory of Kilo: Help Pets in Need

I have recently experienced the loss of my souldog, Kilo. A lot of you have crossed paths with him and will agree he was a truly special being - and I am so grateful he had so many friends across different countries and that he exposed to so much love in the years he walked the Earth.

I feel absolutely lost without him. I met Kilo days after leaving Brazil in 2014 and he was shy and unsure of himself. A lot of things happened over the following months and I ended up in Sweden where I became his sitter. Shortly thereafter I was hopelessly in love with him and circumstances were such that I had the absolute privilege of becoming his mom. I had been alone in a country completely different from mine, away from everything that felt safe and sure. But through Kilo, I found the meaning of home in a place so far - geographically, culturally, meteorologically - from my roots.

He truly blossomed. That shy dog I had met in a dark rainy night the previous year was no more. His fear of furniture disappeared and he turned out to be the goofiest most playful being I'd ever encountered. Not only that, he was so kind. I took him everywhere with me: work, public transport, bars. Everyone that met him instantly fell in love - cat people included. It was the Kilo effect. He made everything around him lighter and brighter, an utter joy to be around.

We had amazing years together. Kilo was originally from Ireland, rehomed in Sweden, and then moved to Denmark with me. I eventually got married and he developed a beautiful relationship with my husband, Jim. Their bond was incredible. We had a wonderful community of friends in Scandiland and his aunts and uncles there meant the world to him. Either at work or going to the park or a pub, we were always met with huge smiles as this brindle ball of energy lit up every environment he entered. When it was time to leave for our next adventure across the great Atlantic pond, I knew our friends would experience more saudade over Kilo than anyone else from our family. And I was absolutely ok with that because I have always known he was a greater contribution to the world than I could ever be.

The move to Chicago wasn't an easy one. There was a lot of adapting. But Kilo never wavered. He was always determined to make the best out of everything. Meeting new people, getting his paws dipped in a different body of water, getting used to a new workplace, everything was chill and done with equal amounts of grace and chaos (if you know him you'll understand this dichotomy). He had yet again made a strange land feel like home - because home, it turned out, was where Kilo was.

People would always be so surprised when we'd tell them he was 12+ , amazed at his fitness and spirits. He had definitely showed signs of slowing down - but then again his baseline was so energetic it was almost a welcome change. But then there were new signs, and they were not good. Though we had always kept a close watch on Kilo's health (he was a vet favorite in every clinic we went to), he started showing discomfort walking. A vet visit revealed advanced arthritis and spondylosis, which we immediately began treating. We started him on physical therapy, changed things around the house and within his routine, added multiple supplements among other alterations - and meds. He seemed to be doing better for a while, but then started declining again. Other vet visits came and we were told to get him an MRI as we were now suspecting IVDD, which could mean surgery. I had already planned to ask for an extended leave or even quit my job should they not accept my terms as I was so sure of that diagnosis and had been reading up so much on IVDD surgery and post op care, I was getting ready to be a full-time stay at home rehab mommy. Whatever it took to get him better. Jim and I had talked about it and it felt reassuring to know I had his support, also because this would be an even greater hit to our finances. But Kilo always gave us so much without asking for anything in return, it was more than fair - and not even up for debate.

Only life had other plans. As the MRI was being done, we got a call from his neurologist with devastating news. There was no IVDD diagnostics, but one of aggressive cancer. At this point he was no longer walking and he was soon to lose control of his front paws, too, among some other very awful things that would happen as the mass continued to 'strangle' his spine and nerves. We brought him home for a couple of days of spoiling him rotten before the hardest goodbye. He passed humanely as the sun shone through our window (he always loved to pick a sunny spot to nap) on March 20th after having had 6 breakfasts that morning, that included salmon, pizza, and even chocolate, while Jim and I reminded him he was the best boy on this universe (and others beyond).

I don't have the words to express how hard these weeks have been. The grief is too deep to explain. Two things that have helped, however: the amount of love and support from friends and family and us not having had to get into debt to help Kilo. Due to his age, we were unable to find him adequate health insurance in the US, and our vet bills since this ordeal started were steep. Between different clinics, emergency consult/MRI/hospitalization, neurologist, adaptations to environment and diet, meds, humane euthanasia and other bits and bobs, we spent close to 11000 USD, which I am so grateful we had available. I fully acknowledge how lucky we were to be able to save for such times, and that it is a privilege that not many have. And how hard it must be for families to make decisions based on their ability to make rent and put food on the table, specially when they have others relying on them for such things.

So today, to honor Kilo, I am humbly asking if you'd consider donating to this campaign. We would like to help two different institutions, one that aids families navigating the hardships of their pets' cancer diagnosis, and another one very close to my heart, that helps rehoming stray animals in my hometown and spaying/neutering/providing vet care/feeding animals from indigenous villages adjacent to the city - and where my animal rights activism began.

I understand the goal I have set is quite ambitious but I am hopeful as Kilo had so many friends. I am happy to answer any questions people have about his diagnosis - and the resources I have found for canine arthritis and IVDD should those be helpful, as well as any inquiries they might have related to his care or the institutions we have opted to help in his loving memory.

We fully acknowledge times are hard, so if you cannot help by donating, sharing also goes a very long way. And another way to help is by being kind to animals you encounter, as they all deserve it. Always!

Thank you for reading. Sending you - and your pets - all the love. That's what Kilo would have done, for sure. He was nothing but warmth and kindness.

I will miss you every day, baby boy. You have touched my life more than you'll ever know. Thank you for everything. I will forever tell others I won the life lottery by not only having found my soulmate, but also getting to have amazing years by his side. You were the greatest gift. I will always love you with all of my being.

Best,

Mari - and Jim