Hiya!

My name is Aimee. Ever since I was young, I never felt like a "typical" girl. I just assumed I was a tomboy. As the years went on, I felt more and more separated from peers, teammates, and friends who were girls. They talked about things I found unimportant, like getting your nails done or getting a guy to like you. That wasn't the only thing that made me feel different. I also didn't react to my body the way that other girls seemed to. When periods were discussed, I was horrified. I also got it years late, which didn't help. Or when they were ecstatic to go bra shopping for the first time. Or when they liked how their growing hips felt in jeans. These things mortified me!

In high school, I even looked up ways to try to get rid of my breasts myself. Not many people know this, but I find it's important to my story because without it, people do not understand the urgency and the impulse to want to make your body yours.

While I was in college, I came out as pansexual and then a year after as non-binary. I would describe non-binary for me as my gender shifts and morphs day-to-day and throughout one day. Sometimes I feel more masculine and sometimes I feel more feminine. Other days I don't feel either. I feel more like an androgynous gremlin living life. But I NEVER feel like a man or a woman! I free float somewhere around prepubescent boy most of the time. Or like Peter Pan for example. I use they/them pronouns now too, which feels so good.

I've spent years researching and planning for a surgery that would help me feel even more at home in this vessel called my body. I looked at different surgeons. I watched videos online of other people's experiences and advice. I asked friends in-person about their top surgeries. I've talked to many therapists about the desire to have surgery. I've researched different procedures, the potential benefits and potential risks.

I am more than ready to have my body be a little bit more like who I am on the inside. Also, both my doctor and therapist have written letters saying this surgery meets criteria for "medical necessity".

I'm tired of the back pain, the gender-dysphoria, the pain while exercising, the difficulty finding clothes that fit, strangers assuming my gender because of my anatomy. There are medical and psychological reasons to do this surgery, and I'm beyond ready for it. There isn't a single thing I haven't thought about.

My surgery date is January 2nd. Between now and then, I need to get supplies for aftercare, rearrange my apartment so it's accessible when I won't be able to move my arms much, and I already asked my dog-sitter for her availability for the six weeks I will need to take care of Maggie when I can't walk her or play tug.

What I'm asking for your help in is to contribute to the expenses relating to the things I'll need to recover. These include: button-up shirts/zip-up jackets (I won't be able to raise my arms above my head and they have to be oversized to not hit the incisions), an angled pillow, gauze, medical tape, scar cream, electrolyte powder, a removable shower head for when I can't reach above my head, cortisone cream, bacitracin, a mastectomy pillow for in the car, bathing wipes, a step stool, paying for the dog-sitter for 6 weeks (she graciously gave me a discount)(still $200) and more.

The recovery for this surgery is complex. Both psychologically and physically. First of all, the surgery is a double mastectomy or top-surgery. The surgery requires limited movement for 6 weeks. During this time, I won't be able to push, pull, lift, or twist more than 5 lbs or a gallon of milk. They say you essentially have T-rex arms for 6 weeks because your arms have to stay close to your body at all times. Otherwise, the scars could reopen, and the healing process takes longer.

So, that is why I'm going to need help getting things that will make moving around more accessible. Like grabbing tools and lots of pillows for sure!

I would really appreciate any help you can give me. I'm currently on disability and am only receiving disability checks, which aren't enough to live on without the surgery! So anything helps! I also have very limited support from family. (1 out of 5 uses my pronouns). I had to go no-contact with my sister and my mother is a pastor. You can guess how that's going.

I am so beyond excited for this surgery! I am well aware that this surgery won't magically solve all of my gender-dysphoria nor all of my physical symptoms. It won't make people suddenly think I'm a boy or use the correct pronouns. It won't make my family accept me for who I am. And yet, I would much rather take the risks of this surgery than have to live in this body for the rest of my life. I wish I could tell my younger self that this is happening because I never thought it would! Help make my dream come true.

Edit: Thank you all so much for your support! Day by day I'm getting closer to my goal. There are still items that I need funds for including:

-Paying for my dog-sitter ($200)

-More gauze and medical tape

-Antibiotic cream and scar cream

-A detachable shower head.

-More shirts/jackets that are zippered or button-up for limited mobility and to prevent incision chaffing.

-Body wipes for showering alternatives for when my incisions or drains cannot get wet

-Spray deodorant (supposedly stick deodorant is impossible to use post-surgery)

-A seat-belt pillow to protect my incisions post-surgery

-Disposable plates/silverware

Every bit of support is so helpful. Even $5 can help me get another package of gauze or medical tape. Thank you so much for your help! It means the world to me!