Friends of Fany

Anyone who meets Fany is instantly aware of how important family, community, and friends are to her. Fany has lived on Whidbey Island, raising her family for the past 6 years and she has become an integral member of our South Whidbey community. Whether playing ultimate frisbee, helping young children as a lead teacher at the Children’s Center, or organizing events like the lantern walk through Langley, Fany can always be found with a smile on her face and a kind word for everyone. She has two very sweet boys who are involved in their school activities and sports.

During these past few years, Fany has been silently suffering through manipulation and gaslighting at the hands of her ex-partner. This past November things finally came to a head- Fany woke up one morning and realized that her husband had abandoned her and their family for his home in Mexico. She recognized that it would be healthier for her family if she filed for divorce and moved out with her kids. Her hope was to work with her husband and be amicable through the process, putting the needs and best interests of the children first. Unfortunately he was not able to approach this life change with the same compassion and understanding as Fany has been able to.

Fany filed for divorce in December, and as part of that court filing, both parents were clearly and explicitly restricted by the court from removing their 3.5 year old son from his residence. On January 3rd, Fany’s ex-partner picked him up from school. Without any communication, he left for his home in Mexico, wrongfully abducting their young son. This was the second time that Fany experienced the horror of having her own son taken by an ex-partner- when he was a child in Mexico her older son had also been abducted by his father, which caused a great deal of trauma and trepidation for Fany. Knowing this was Fany’s greatest fear, her ex-partner preyed upon this vulnerability, retraumatizing Fany and her older son. Along with their 3.5 year old child, her ex had also taken all of their documents; the family’s passports, their greencards, and anything that would enable her to travel to Mexico to retrieve her son and bring him home. This followed the pattern of behavior he exhibited throughout their marriage; controlling, premeditated manipulation, and putting his needs before the wellbeing of his family. It also ensured that Fany had no legal way to regain custody of her toddler.

These actions changed her life. Fany spent the next two months filling out all the paperwork and working with any legal agency and organization that would help her. She worked hard to get everything lined up legally so she could bring her toddler home- contacting Senator Murray’s office, the police, NCMEC, the State Department, the Mexican Consulate, and many more. During this time Fany continued to be a loving mother to her teenage son, even while struggling and worrying incessantly about her baby boy. 2 months after he was taken to Mexico, Fany was able to go, with great risk to herself, and pick him up with the help of her family and her lawyers. They were able to safely come back home where they have a community who is eager to support them and welcome them back.

This was an incredibly draining process. Through it all Fany has maintained her smile, her love of her family and her passion for teaching and this community. However, it has taken a toll on her emotionally and financially with the many obstacles her ex has put in her way. Fany had to hire a lawyer in the US as well as one in Mexico. She needed to get all of the same documents in both countries in order to bring her child home. Her lawyers, understanding the urgency of reuniting a 3 year-old wrongfully taken from his mother, did the work for her without asking for their full fee upfront. This currently leaves her with a sizable bill.

Whether she’s helping to raise our young children or putting on an event for the community, Fany can always be found supporting others. In so many ways, this is the best definition of ‘community’ and one of the most critical components of this place we are lucky enough to call home. Fany needs our help and it is our time to help support her.

At the moment, Fany needs $11,000. Her divorce is still ongoing, and this would help to offset some of those costs and the unfair burden that was placed on her by having to rescue her son in Mexico.

Please donate anything you can to help her pay her bills. This will go towards alleviating some of the pressure and stress, and start taking steps toward putting this traumatic and life-altering experience behind her and her boys. Fany wants nothing more than to rebuild a safe space for her children, do her valued work at the Children's Center, and be part of the community that she- and her boys- call home.

From Fany, “IT TOOK A SUPPORTIVE VILLAGE, A DIVINE POWER, AND PURE LOVE to bring my son back. I am deeply grateful to all of you, every single one of you. You have been there with me all this time, giving me hugs, listening to me, feeding me, offering my job back when I came back, a warm home to live with my kids, money, legal advice, plane tickets for me and my parents, kindness and love. I am very lucky to keep experiencing kindness and love from people that I don’t even know, but who are touched by our situation. I have faith in us, us as a whole community, and humanity.”