Get the house ready for Mike to come home

If you don't already know me, I am Lisa. The daughter of Mike. The strongest man I know.

I don’t really know where to begin. So, I suppose I will start at the beginning. As his story indicates, my dad (Mike) went in for open heart surgery on 12/28. All seemed to go well with the surgery. His only complication at the time was that he was experiencing some excessive bleeding and required several blood transfusions in the first 24 hours post surgery which also meant some extended time on a ventilator. I spent all day with him on the day after surgery while he was coming off the sedation medicine.

I walked into the ICU on Saturday, December 30 expecting to see my dad alert and awake. Instead, I walked into a scene that knocked the wind out of me. My dad had suffered a stroke in the early hours of the morning (we later found out it was more than one stroke). At this point, he was not speaking and no use of his right side. Because of the recent heart surgery and bleeding, the doctors were unable to treat with “clot buster” blood thinners. Also, because of his level of oxygen support, the doctors were unable to do an MRI to assess the extent of the damage. We could do nothing but wait. I spent every minute they would allow me in the ICU with him (10-12 hours a day). The next 24 hours were excruciatingly quiet.

On Monday, January 1, 2024, I walked in for my visit in the ICU to see my dad sitting up in the cardiac chair. He smiled at me and said “water”. His first word was WATER. The nurses said he had just starting say that about an hour before I walked in. Within in an hour he was singing the word water to me. I had spent a great part of the previous days singing to him while he was both asleep and awake. I asked if he wanted me to sing and he shook his head yes. I squatted down and held his hands. I looked at him and sang, “You are my sunshine” he looked back at me and sang “my only sunshine.” I don’t think there was a dry eye in the unit as we sang together for the next hour. My granddad Ed (Mike’s dad) was still in town. Paul was on a plane on his way from Seattle and Diana was on her way to the hospital. All to hear him sing again.

The next couple of days brought a lot of singing, talking, reading and laughing. He had SO MANY visitors (I couldn’t even name you all or thank you all enough for coming). He was doing well in Physical Therapy and Occupational Therapy. He was standing with assistance, using his right hand to feed himself and in general great spirits. On Thursday, January 4th, his doctor wrote orders to release him from the ICU to a regular room. He spent 45 minutes in that room before they sent him back to ICU as his oxygen levels dropped dramatically. The next morning ultrasounds revealed blood clots in both legs and likely a blood clot in his lungs as well (hence the breathing issues). In the words of my dad, this was “crap all around.”

Because of the clots and breathing concerns, he needed to take a rest through the weekend. The oxygen support he required kept him in the ICU. He and Paul watched the Steelers play Saturday night. Sunday we watched church together online. Paul was supposed to go home Sunday, but his flight got delayed until Tuesday. So, we just enjoyed the next few days together with Dad talking, singing and laughing. The Physical Therapists even decided Monday that he would try walking with a walker the next day. Tuesday, January 9th, Paul and I walked in for our visit and something was definitely not right. Suddenly Dad was not speaking nor moving again. It wasn’t long before the twitching started and they told us he was having Focal Seizures. Paul said goodbye and had to leave for Seattle in the middle of all of this. It was a hard day. When I walked in the next day, they let me know that he had gotten progressively worse after I left for the night. They did an MRI and saw that he had suffered an “evolving stoke”. Basically, the original stroke grew as a result of the seizures. We were back to Day 1 post stroke. The first stroke was tough, this second event was devastating.

The next few days were rough watching his frustration with not being able to do the things that he was doing so well just a few days before. He is strong and was able to stand with assistance, but verbally, not much…not even any singing. However, his breathing was getting better quickly. It seems the clot in his lungs (with the help of blood thinners) was resolving. I had already made arrangements to go back home to Florida on Sunday, January 14. It was heart wrenching to walk away and he could not even say goodbye. I told him I love him and he was the strongest man I know. I told him he needed to get his brain and lungs in order so he could get out of there. While I cried, he wrapped his arm around me to comfort me. I knew my dad was in there somewhere. I blew him a kiss and left not knowing what would happen next.

Monday, January 15th at 4PM, Diana texted to ask me if I wanted to Facetime Dad. To my surprise and delight, he looked at me (with no oxygen support in his nose) smiled and said, “Hi Lisa! My brain woke up!” We had such an amazing conversation and I felt like I could breathe again. My dad is back. I know he will be better that ever.

He spent another 3 days in the ICU, a few in a regular room and the in hospital rehab. All in all he spent 40 days in the hospital. February 8th, he moved to a Skilled Nursing Facility. After doing some research, exploring options, making phone calls and praying, we submitted a list to the hospital of our top three choices for Skilled Nursing facilities for Dad. He ended up moving to Edinboro Manor. This is such a HUGE BLESSING. He is close to home. Diana has been able to visit more frequently, for shorter periods of time and on a schedule that is more conducive to her life. She has also been able largely to get there on her own (huge thanks to everyone who has been helping her get to Erie for visits). So many of you also live in Edinboro (or near) and have been able to spend more time checking in on him and visiting.

Keely, Brady and Danielle have all made it home in the last month or so. Paul is going again in a couple of weeks. I just got home from a short visit. It was so good to see my dad. He is working hard on his recovery. He walked with his walker for 475 feet (longest walk so far) and climbed up and down some stairs unassisted. He wants to get home badly. He did get to go to church this week. That was his first venture out that was not to a medical appointment. Thanks so much to all of the church members that helped and made that possible.

I had a chance to re-evaluate the home and speak with family about some needs to make it more accessible for him as well as for Diana. They are having a ramp installed on the back door. We will be putting a chairlift on the staircase so that they can get upstairs to the shower and bedroom easily. We will need to have multiple wheelchairs and walkers (one for each floor of the house and possibly an additional one for the car). We will need toilet seat accommodations for two bathrooms, shower chair and handrails in the bathrooms (among other places in the home). Another wish item would be a mechanical recliner that helps him stand. All of this takes time and money. We are aiming to get started ASAP. I am reaching out to his insurance to see how much of this we can get covered or assistance with. As a family, we decided to set up a GoFundMe for anyone who would like to offer financial support.

I said to dad this week that he was the strongest man I know. He quickly responded, "You must not know many men then." At least his wit is still with him. LOL.

This has been a long journey so far. We know we are in for a marathon and not just a sprint. Our family has been blessed through this crisis. Many of you have asked how you can help, and this is a way to support my dad. Thank you all for what you have done so far. Love you all. Be Blessed.