Goodbye, our Gentle Giant (Father, Son, Brother)

My name is Antoinette, and on behalf of my Mum, I am raising funds for my brother’s funeral. My brother, Michael Tolulope Oyebode, died on Thursday, 29 September 2022, from a heart attack in the morning. He was 41 years old; he died alone in his flat in North Yorkshire. My brother was a Product Design Engineer and an Engineering and Design Technology Teacher.

His last Facebook post, the day before he died, expressed his pain at not seeing his sons. He said: “Miss my boys. It will be five weeks tomorrow that I haven’t seen them. Found Elijah’s drawing on the wall. Didn’t realise it had been there all along”. My brother died of a broken heart.

I call him: “Gentle Giant”. He was tall, but he was loving, caring and quiet. His boys, Elijah Michael Oyebode (aged 5) and Zeke Nathaniel Oyebode (aged 1), were his “world”.

Michael was born in Nigeria on 10 April 1981, but my Mum looked after him from age eight after both his parents died in a car accident when he was 18 months old, on 23 October 1982. His mother was my Mum’s older sister; therefore, my Mum took him in as her son and brought him to the UK in 1989. We grew up together as brother and sister. He was everything to me, the best older brother anyone could ever have or ask for. Despite our Mum’s disability (polio in both legs and a wheelchair-user), she loved him and cared for him through primary school, secondary school, University and beyond.

We are raising this money to cover his funeral costs: grave site and internment, funeral directors’ costs, coffin and hearse, flowers, the printing of memorial booklets, the headstone, and the transport of my brother’s body from Yorkshire to London. He doesn’t have family in Yorkshire.

My brother leaves behind two beautiful sons and the students he inspired to become great engineers, designers, and technologists. All those around him loved him.

My brother’s funeral is scheduled for Friday, 28 October 2022. Please find it in your heart to donate. He did not deserve what happened to him. Michael, you may be gone, but forever missed and loved.