Help Cody Beam Get Back On Their Feet After Abuse

Hi, friends.  Asking for help is always a little uncomfortable, especially when it has to do with money.  However, my longtime friend, Cody Beam, is in the middle of extricating themself from an abusive romantic relationship.  One of the most overlooked aspects of recovery from domestic abuse is the long-lasting financial scars it leaves. Though Cody has been fortunate in this regard in a number of ways, they still need a little help getting back on their feet.  We’re hoping to curb some of the longer-term financial consequences through a little immediate monetary assistance, and that’s where you come in. We gently ask for your donations to cover legal fees, replace stolen property, and recoup some of the coercively drained savings to pay for what have become emergency expenses.  I hope you’ll consider contributing only what is comfortable, and please also think about sharing this fundraiser with your trusted friends.


We think it’s important to be as transparent as possible about where this need is coming from and where your donations will be used.  Though I am running this fundraiser on behalf of Cody, they would like to offer you a small glimpse into what they have been going through, as well as a breakdown of where the money will be potentially going:


“Like any abusive relationship, my relationship with Jake started out like a fairytale. He cooked me dinner, he wrote me sweet messages, got me thoughtful gifts, listened... but from there it all went downhill. It started with the little lies here and there, then morphed into grander deceptions. It wasn't until after I left the relationship that I started to realize just how deep the lies went. These lies that he told led to me taking leave from my graduate program to take care of him, working the bare number of hours possible to make ends meet, and entering into a marriage that I never wanted. In addition to the lies and manipulation, I was emotionally and sexually abused regularly, and while thankfully physical abuse was less common, threats of and allusions to it were not. There is too much that happened to elaborate on here, but if you would like to know more then please feel free to see the public statement I made when I first left:


https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=3039930886048197&id=100000939466002


It was through our unwritten tenant agreement that Jake furthered his manipulation of me.  He has threatened on multiple occasions to sue. Though he has no real legal standing and would be unlikely to come out ahead, the matter remains that he can and may bring me to court.  Even if a settlement were to be reached in which he had to cover my legal costs, such a ruling would most likely be merely symbolic, as he wouldn't have the funds to pay restitution. This is the first expense.  Though difficult to estimate, I would like to set aside $1,500.00 for emergency legal fees in case this comes to pass.


While Jake left the premises within the timeline legally required, it would appear that in his departure he stole or damaged an estimated $2,000.00 of my personal belongings. Though I can never replace the sentimental items, practical items like my futon, clothing, and various kitchenwares still need to be replaced. This next $1,000.00 would go toward replacing these household items and repairing some of the property damage he left in his wake.


I did some calculations, and after everything, I estimate that I’ve lost around $17,000.00 in lost wages from all the times he pulled me away from work, as well as the pay differential in the job I was coerced into taking.  During our time together, when he emotionally manipulated me into draining my savings by lying to me repeatedly about his health, I lost an estimated $5,000.00 Again, like the time and energy and well-being I lost to him, I know I will not recoup these finances.  However, because of this, I am now struggling against high-interest loans, credit card debt, and a subsequently-lowered credit score. If I receive any donations past the initial $2,500.00 that we are asking for, I will be putting that money immediately towards these debts to prevent high accumulations of interest.


If this fundraiser exceeds my needs to get back on my feet, or if I am able to find aid through other avenues, then any remaining funds will be donated to a local nonprofit that aids individuals like myself.  We are currently waiting on approval to name a favored organization in this fundraiser, and we will update with the name and contact information once we hear back.


I am so grateful for the outpouring of love and support I have received in the wake of my announcement.  Please know I appreciate all of the help I have been given.


With Love and Much Gratitude,

Cody”


Thank you all very much for the time you took to read this, whether or not you can afford to make a small donation at this time.  We appreciate every one of you and thank you for your support.


P.S. If this fundraiser has sparked your interest in learning more about the financial repercussions of domestic abuse, and you would like to learn more, I encourage you to begin your continued research with this article, recommended by Cody:


https://scholarship.law.berkeley.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi%3Farticle%3D4178%26context%3Dcalifornialawreview&ved=2ahUKEwiY9rO4-t_lAhVEheAKHWSWCsIQFjABegQIBxAC&usg=AOvVaw1An4n6nJOK63YBQTtfhrMl">https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://scholarship.law.berkeley.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi%3Farticle%3D4178%26context%3Dcalifornialawreview&ved=2ahUKEwiY9rO4-t_lAhVEheAKHWSWCsIQFjABegQIBxAC&usg=AOvVaw1An4n6nJOK63YBQTtfhrMl