Help Peter Cole in his fight

Please take the time to read this message and share it with everyone you can. Kaydee and I believe this is of the utmost importance. There comes a moment in life where things are put into perspective and certain things that “really matter” become apparent.

We all are born into situations that are beyond our control. For some, the situation you are born into is full of love and nurturing support but that is not the case for everyone. Often the balance of love and support does not need to be “perfect” in order to cultivate a healthy foundation for our lives. However, for those born into a situation without any semblance of love or support, they often suffer tremendous damage practically before the challenge of life begins.

When we lived in Oregon we became very close with the Cole family. In October 2009 Greg and Neva Cole adopted two boys, John and Peter, from an orphanage in Lesozavodsk, Russia. John was just over 10 years old and Peter was almost 4 years old. Their initial medical reports and home-study information (handed to them upon departure from Russia) indicated extreme neglect and abuse.  John was the oldest of four siblings and Peter was the youngest. The two siblings (a brother and a sister) between John and Peter died as a result of the neglect and abuse from their birth parents.  Both birth parents were reported alcoholics and had Hepatitis B.  Their home study report stated: unsanitary conditions, no normal food, dirty home, no bed linens, no garden, minimal food, and no firewood for the winter.  When John came home to the US he was in the 50% percentile for height and weight, Peter was in the 3% for height and weight.

We witnessed the loving and nurturing environment that the Cole family created for John and Peter to grow up in after being adopted.  Although a loving and nurturing environment was provided by the Cole family, the early childhood trauma John and Peter experienced in Russia left deep rooted mental and emotional damage for both boys. Recently these struggles have manifested themselves in the form of substance abuse and suicidal threats.

John is now 21 years old and Peter is 14 years old. Both John and Peter spent time with traditional therapists for treatment but showed little progress and no lasting results. In March 2020 Greg and Neva enrolled Peter into a wilderness therapy treatment program called New Vision Wilderness which is a therapy program specifically created for young men and women who are struggling with the effects of extreme childhood trauma. What Greg and Neva have learned in the first phases of Peter’s treatment at New Vision Wilderness is that this early childhood trauma is stored in the nervous system that produces the fight/flight/freeze response.  These responses become hard-wired into their behavior and unless this trauma is addressed with intense therapy in places like wilderness therapy, it is extremely difficult to repair. One description that has been shared with us is to think of the human nervous system as a tree with the roots created as early as life begins in the womb and cemented during early childhood. Behaviors that a person exhibits are represented as branches extending from the trunk of the tree where their emotions reside. If you try to fix bad behaviors by “trimming branches” it works fine as emotions are based on the roots that are properly established.  However, if the problem exists within the roots then working on the branches is purely a band aid that will not last. Ultimately the roots need to be repaired which is the goal of New Visions Wilderness therapy.

We are sharing this message / story in an effort to gather together in support of Peter Cole. We believe that it is paramount to Peter’s life to find a way to intervene now before it’s too late. The efforts of specialized therapy have created a massive financial burden on the Cole family. We have created a GoFundMe page for this effort and should you be in a position to contribute, no matter how large or how small, it will be greatly appreciated. The costs for wilderness therapy and after care treatment are more than $60,000 with none covered by insurance.  The Cole’s spent $7,000 for a full psychological evaluation that was completed with Peter while in wilderness therapy.  Primary diagnosis is Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, with many learning disabilities across the spectrum of Math, Language Arts, Social Skills, and Emotional Regulation.  He is developmentally between the ages of 8-10, and yet is expected to enter high school this fall. Greg and Neva will be engaging the services of a Special Education Attorney to work with the district for a comprehensive Individual Education Plan. 

We are setting a goal to raise $50,000 for Peter’s therapy and after care treatment.  It has now been recommended that Peter attend a Therapeutic Boarding School after he leaves NVW.  At this point the expense of finding and enrolling Peter in such a program is unknown but early research has placed this number at $12,000 to $16,000 per month.

John Cole is currently enrolled in local substance abuse therapy program.  He was offered the option of the Young Adult New Vision Wilderness Therapy and declined.  He has limited contact with the family. 

Along with financial donations, we ask for prayers for guidance for both Peter and John as they are on this lengthy journey towards mental, emotional, and spiritual health.

Thank you for any donations, prayers and support to help Peter in his fight.

-Wade and Kaydee Carman