Help for Henrietta

I'm launching this GoFundMe to support Henrietta (Bretta for short) and the medical costs associated with saving her life and setting her up for a safe future.

 

Bretta's life as a neuro-diverse transgender woman is celebrated within her family. But the world, community, and medical options available have not been so kind. Caralee Burton has fiercely fought and advocated for her daughter and won't ever stop doing so. But the financial impact of that fight has reached a breaking point. I'm hoping we can raise funds to take the pressure off her family so they can focus on the emotional healing that is ahead of them.

 

My goal is to raise $50,000 for Caralee and Bretta (details on allocation below)

 

 

 

 

Backstory:

 

Years ago, we became fast friends with Caralee Burton, and her daughter Bretta (who is also known by those close to her as Bretta The Bookworm) when she was only 13 years old. She was already reading from the same library as my husband Daniel (we're talking DENSE books that are way over most adults' heads!) They swapped recommendations with engaging reviews. We grew to love her for many reasons including her brilliance, creativity, honesty, and incredible compassion. Back then, Bretta hadn’t yet come out as the Transgender Woman she is. She was also living with undiagnosed ASD (autism spectrum disorder). As she aged, the effects of puberty and the significant changes in her social surroundings compounded the stress of these already tender attributes of her life, until it became intolerable.

 

This campaign is to raise funds to support Caralee’s efforts to save her child, Bretta, from an elusive threat that has ended in three separate suicide attempts over the last 2.5 years.

 

 

 

 

 

Unlike many physical illnesses, the chronic stress, trauma, anxiety, and depression embedded in Bretta’s life as a neuro-diverse transgender woman, are much harder to diagnose and effectively treat long term. TO BE CLEAR, BEING TRANSGENDER AND NEURO-DIVERSE ARE NOT PROBLEMS TO FIX. Both her neuro-diversity and her gender identity are qualities of Bretta we CELEBRATE.

 

It is the exhausting nature of Bretta’s efforts to adapt to a world that, more often than not, severely lacks accommodations, acceptance, and long-term health care solutions.

 

Even some treatments (for example; exposure therapy, in-patient psychiatric treatment, and certain pharmaceutical medications) increased her unimaginable anxiety and depression, at times becoming so acute she would endure bouts of psychosis.

 

Imagine the terror of seeking treatment, only to receive interventions that substantially increased stress, triggering psychosis, leading to more prescription medication, which numbed and suppressed the only qualities she really loved about herself - her creativity.

 

It took Bretta an entire year and a substantial financial and energetic investment, for her to dig her way out of the cycle nature of the mental healthcare system (certainly not saying it’s unhelpful for everyone).

 

Each of Bretta’s attempts to end her life have been followed by hospitalizations requiring life-supporting measures and months of inpatient and intensive outpatient behavioral health treatments. Therapeutic treatments like traditional medications, alternative medications, art therapy, music therapy, equine therapy, sound healing, meditation, somatic healing, ropes courses, natural resource learning, CBT, IFS, EMDR, DBT, and many other proven trauma-based therapies.

 

MANY OF THESE TREATMENTS WERE AMAZING; they truly helped Bretta to heal, regulate, and manage her beautiful life. We are all beyond grateful for the dedicated providers in the field of mental, emotional, and spiritual health and for the possibilities that still await Bretta because of their contribution through innovative practices.

 

The travesty of the pattern that has emerged in Bretta’s mental healthcare is the limited access to resources that have proven effective for her. Even with cooperation from her insurance provider, long-term alternative treatments ARE NOT COVERED.

 

As a result, as soon as Bretta appears “stable,” the insurance enforces limits to coverage. Life-supporting, effective treatments become inaccessible along with her ability to cope with everyday stressors that come with her unique circumstance.

 

The lengths both Bretta and Caralee have gone, and are willing to go, to build a stable internal and external world for Bretta are inspiring examples of their commitment to one another and to the possibility of life. I want to do everything possible to ensure that financial burden does not get in the way of their efforts!

 

A few years ago, Caralee supported me by setting up a fundraiser to help me with medical costs. It’s not the kind of thing a friend ever hopes to get the chance to “repay” because so often, these campaigns follow a crisis. But it's an honor to have the opportunity to help such an incredible, selfless woman and her amazing daughter, no matter the circumstances.

 

Our hearts are heavy because of the emotional and financial stress their family has been through. But I know this community can help. Both for Bretta and her family and as a token of support for neurodiverse transgender people everywhere.

 

 

 

 

Go Fund Me Goal:

$50,000

 

To be allocated as follows:

 

$20,000 (1,600+/month) for Bretta’s out-of-network, alternative (and proven effective) treatments for one year. This will provide her a combination of access to a therapist who specializes in trauma integration, DBT skill development, and treatment designed specifically to help Bretta work through suicidal ideation and stress management. ASD management through Occupation Therapy and Equine Therapy. And facilitated doses of Ketamine treatment through a licensed provider (the most effective and costly treatment for Bretta thus far).

 

$10,000 for interspersed, as needed, intensive treatments. For example, 4-5 days of in-patient treatment, twice in the next 12 months. Intensive, self development/group courses. For example, Caralee thinks Bretta would enjoy a Byron Katie event like the School for The Work, created to safely facilitate  LGTBQIA+ experience. It costs $5k for a 9-day school. If needs be, these funds could also/instead be used for two weeks of consecutive intensive inpatient treatment. 

 

$20,000 to support Caralee’s recovery from the financial costs associated with Bretta’s health care management since 2019. Caralee has gracefully navigated the chronic stress of being a single mother of three, in addition to navigating the repeated crisis of Bretta’s suicide prevention, recovery following attempts, and long-term treatments. As a self-employed lifestyle coach, the cumulative effect of missing weeks of work to be by Bretta’s side in the hospital and treatment has taken a heavy toll. We want to offer her financial support to be more available for Bretta and create a deeper sense of stability in their home.

 

Anything additional will support the creation of a physical space for Caralee to coach Meditation, movement, and nutrition clients. Caralee is dedicated to sharing her wellness practices with the LGBTQIA+ community.