Hope, grief, and a few LARGE bumps in the road

In August of 2021, I was finally able to get out of an extremely abusive living situation after decades of verbal and psychological abuse, and begin the healing process.

Life happened, of course: I moved twice, my 12 year old cat Isabella, died. Car repairs were needed, and while I got a great new job title that actually matched the work I'd been doing for years and what seemed like a good start to no longer being drastically underpaid while I tried to make the world a better place...I don't think I could have predicted the last 18 months of my life if I'd tried.

In 2023, I lost both my parents in a very short period of time. Two weeks after my birthday, my mother was in hospice and despite the fact that she had been sabotaging her own health for years in order to manipulate and control me while I kept a roof over our heads and food on the table no matter how verbally or physically violent she became, the loss hit me hard.

Then six weeks later, my father's health took a sharp turn, and like my mother, he never regained consciousness so I couldn't even say goodbye. With the support of my friends, I was able to manage my grief through the first few months, but by summer, thanks to the situation at work becoming ridiculously stressful and insomnia that nothing would even put a dent in, I was in the worst depression spiral in 20.years and dangerously close to needing inpatient care I couldn't afford.

The agonizing grief process, coupled with instability at work that made the situation unsuatainable, meant finances were shaky at best, by the end of August 2023.

Fortunately, I was able to find a short-term contract position and that made a significant difference between October 2023 and May of 2024.

However, finding a remote role as a Creative Director of copy or a copywriter has proved challenging ever since. With the rise of ghost listings and the proliferation of Large Language Models, I have yet to find a job and it's time to be pragmatic. My small savings and being frugal carried me through the last several months but now I need to meet rent, utility, food, prescriptions, cat food and litter for Stella, trauma therapy, and transportation expenses while I continue searching for a position and get back on my feet again after getting knocked back and sideways by devastating grief and subsequent life changes.

Raising these funds keeps me and Stella housed and afloat while I keep pounding the virtual pavement. There won't ever be enough ways to say thank you, for anyone able to contribute. My habit has always been to pay kindness forward, because none of us can ever get through what life throws at us, in isolation. So, please know that your support, whether it's $1, $10, or $100, makes a tangible difference to someone who is still trying find solid ground after a lifetime of taking care of other people under very traumatic circumstances, and that my gratitude will never be something hollow.

Thank you.