I kindly ask for your help during my dire time of need

I’m at the lowest of my low.

I dont know what to do. I can’t even off myself. I’ve been begging the universe for a little respite for 20 years and nothing. People have been saying “it’ll get better” since the day I got abandoned by my parents and it hasn’t, it’s regressed or stayed the same no matter how hard I try. I don’t know what I did wrong to deserve all this. I’ve tried my hardest to be a source of happiness and help in life, not for something in return but just because it’s nice to see others that need help get it and smile. I was just always slightly hoping that things would be easier.

My cat is gone (and every time I think about that my insides are ripped to a million pieces), I have no job (I’ve applied to many and still am applying on the daily) I got stabbed while volunteering, I did a “trial period” of a week at a job I had to walk 4 hours in travel time for only to be told at the end that I’m not enough team spirit and I haven’t been paid by them, my account is the negatives now mostly due to my car (which I can’t even use cause I can’t afford the stupid expensive-for-no-reason registration), I’m letting people down at the animal shelter I work at because I can’t get there and because I’m injured, and I can’t afford food, my medication, or rent. I’m in talks with certain resources but it’s a lot of waiting time and being put on wait lists because there are others that take priority over me(which I completely understand), I just was hoping to have maybe some government help but even that is to no avail.

If there is anyone, anyone, out there that feels like they can help me out of this hole and back on regular ground I’d appreciate it immensely. I don’t have a lot of material items that I can give you for your help but here are some things:

- omicron of xmen

- some clothes (some clothes I need to keep for interviews and stuff)

Or if you need someone to listen to or if you need someone for physical labour (my leg is healing and I’m hobbling but I can still work) please let me do it.

I have never wanted to beg someone for help like this because I still feel off and queasy asking for something without providing anything in return or taking food out of your mouth to put into mine, so if you want anything mentioned above and can help please let me know and I will try.

Thank you for reading and for considering to help me. Have a great day.