Into The Heartspace album in memory of my dad, Kurt David

When my dad died a year ago on November 12th, I was singing one of my original songs to him. The song I sang had three words: Let go, surrender.

Over and over, I sang this prayer for him to peacefully release his body and surrender to the love and the light that were waiting on the other side.

For many months after his death, I didn't sing. I wouldn't touch my instruments. It was too heartbreaking. Then when I tried, I would often find myself beginning to cry through the songs because more than anything, music is what tied me to my dad.

Kurt David, founder of the music show Takin Ya Back with Kurt David, was always my number one music fan. Growing up, he took me to weekly voice lessons, choir practices, and every other lesson imaginable. He was a drummer and a DJ, and was constantly listening to music while creating his weekly radio show.

His entire life was music, and I am crying as I write this, with so much awe and appreciation for the love of music that he imparted into me and how it shaped me into the woman I am today.

Four years ago, I decided to make my first album and call it Into The Heartspace. I released 5 singles and then experienced a crushing defeat when the song I had invested the most time, money and care into did not land with listeners, and I ran out of funds to complete the album.

The song was called LOUD A Women's Empowerment Anthem for Sexual Assault Survivors. It's a powerful song with a moving music video, and when it failed to take off, I was devastated. My dad listened to me cry so much, and encouraged me not to give up. At the time, I was so heartbroken that I didn't listen to him, and I didn't release more music for two years.

Last year, right around his final birthday, I did release another song: Safe With Me. My dad loved this song, and I spent hours on FaceTime with him practicing over and over before a big performance (pictured above!). Even when Alzheimer's was overtaking him, he could always stay present to listen to me sing. He always remembered my songs.

So now, in honor of his memory, I am ready to complete the journey that he helped me to begin and supported for every moment of his life. He gave me the first donation to my last GoFundMe, and talked me up to all his musical friends. It almost feels impossible to do this without his support, but that's actually what's leading me to create this fundraiser.

When my dad was dying, and in the time of my grieving, you my dear community, held me and supported me with such tenderness and kindness. My dad would have been so grateful to see me so well taken care of and loved up. I know so many of you have encouraged me to release this song Let Go, Surrender, and to finally finish the album. So with your support and encouragement, I am ready!

I am taking concrete actions to make Into The Heartspace happen, including getting back in the studio with my Grammy-nominated producer Ben Leinbach on 11-11 and releasing Let Go, Surrender on 11-12. My intention is to finish the album by May of 2025!

Here's the story behind the album from the original GoFundMe:

Six years ago, I pulled a professional musician friend into a closet, turned off the lights and.... SANG MY HEART OUT!

I couldn't bear to see his face or risk anyone else in the house hearing me as I sang the very first song my heart had ever channeled.

I had been singing other peoples' music for 20 years, and always struggled to remember it and stay on pitch because it was never inside of me and never resonated as true and real.

For the first time, music poured out of my soul.

It was pure. It was true. It was Divine.

When I got done singing, he said to me, "You know you're a musician, right?"

I laughed nervously and shrugged him off, not willing to believe him, and yet secretly knowing he was right.

Since that night, songs haven't stopped pouring out of me.

As they've come, I haven't been able to keep them inside! They resonate deeply in my own heart, and every time I sing to someone and see them cry, laugh or go into a deep state of bliss, I remember that I am just the channel and know I am doing exactly what I'm meant to do.

I now know and own that I am a musician, an instrument of grace.

And at the same time, for the last seven years, I've dedicated myself to my calling of being a conduit of love through guiding meditations and teaching mindfulness classes in-person and as a teacher on the Insight Timer.

Listen to Guided Meditations to Open Your Heart

By 2019, I had stepped boldly into my calling to be an instrument of grace by introducing some of my songs into my signature live meditation event "The Monday Heartspace," collaborating with a friend to lead sound healings with guided meditations and even leading kirtans with guided meditations!

I could have done that for the rest of my life, until our world came to a halt.

The pandemic gave me the time to pause and see how I can be of service on a global scale by offering my prayers digitally.

From many months of reflection, introspection, and prayer, Into The Heartspace was born.

My debut album is a concept unlike anything I've seen.

It was born in a vision of merging my vocations of meditation and music to inspire healing, restoration and inner harmony.

Into The Heartspace album will contain both original hypnotic hymns and guided meditations.

This album weaves together song and meditation seamlessly - all the meditations have the same theme of the song they were inspired by.

This album is for YOU!

It's coming out into the world at this time on purpose so that you can feel the vibrations of unconditional love, remember your true nature as a human BEing, practice forgiveness for yourself and others, and open to receive blessings, abundance and all the magic life has to offer.

I am here to prove what's possible through the power of unconditional love.

If you've been impacted by the work of the Heartspace over the last few years, or if you are a believer in the power of unconditional love to heal and transform hearts across our planet, I ask for you to consider donating to Into The Heartspace.

All money raised here will go toward expenses incurred in the production of the album, including purchasing a more powerful computer that can run the software I'm using, new licenses for upgraded software, paying the lovely people involved, and in building a website and online presence to promote the forthcoming singles and album.

I have never publicly asked for support in this way before, and I have noticed so much resistance in doing so, because I want to be fully self-sustaining. I have been indoctrinated with the "by the bootstrap" mentality that I must be a self-made woman in order to succeed.

And then I remember that I'm living proof of the new paradigm. I know the power of commUNITY to lift each other up, support each other to achieve our dreams, and to practice giving and receiving generosity.

Your support means so much to me - it's how I came out of the closet and emerged into the LIGHT of love that lives inside of me and will emanate through each and every one of these songs and meditations.

From the depths of my soul,

I see you. I honor you. I love you.