Help Jayni Get Gender-Affirming Surgery & Peaceful Recovery!

Who am I and What am I doing here?

Hi, I'm Jayni!

I'm a transgender woman living in NC, barely scraping by with my wife and cats in the lower part of the income bracket, and I am seeking gender affirming vaginoplasty (GRS) to relieve my gender dysphoria and help me live my life more authentically as who I am. :)

My upcoming procedure is scheduled for December 3, 2024 at UNC. I've already had to postpone it twice this year, but due to my low income job situation (Doordash) and the high cost of living (rent, food, bills) I have not been able to save any money towards the procedure, as we have been struggling just to survive.

Furthermore, as I am a trans woman in the US, the incoming government will severely threaten my access to medically necessary gender-affirming healthcare and indeed my health insurance altogether (ACA) in the very near future. Without coverage, there is no way I can afford this procedure, making this essentially a "Now or Never" situation.

I feel there will never be a better chance for me to get this surgery. It would mean so much to me to get the help I need to make this happen. However, the absolute biggest challenge in my case is not paying for the procedure itself (which is mostly covered), but surviving the two months of required recovery time, as I will not be able to work at all to support us during that time.

In short, I need outside help...

What your money will be going towards:

The heartfelt, honest answer would be helping me to greatly improve my life and realize a dream I've had since I was little- to have a body that fully matches who I am on the inside. :')

More directly, the money will be going towards helping me cover costs of living during my downtime, such as rent (which is too damn high!) as well as food and monthly bills for about two months. Some funds will also be used to purchase the items I need for post-op care and for a couple of nights in a hotel near the hospital (as recommended by the surgeon).

The total amount I am hoping to raise is $4800. Please note this is for costs covering a period of two months and is not required all at once (although that would certainly do a lot to ease my stress).

Also, the number isn't random. I've meticulously calculated what I will need and for what from now until at least mid January, breaking costs down into tiers of importance and timeframe.

The following is the breakdown of those estimated costs.

Immediate Needs: $780 (need ASAP)

Covers: The rest of Nov rent (late), Post-op supplies, food

Yeah, I tried my very best to take care of it myself, but sadly I still need about $420 for rent before 11/26 (which is when Eviction court date is scheduled), at which time an official eviction will be put on my record. I can definitely not afford to let that happen, so this is first priority.

By the way, total rent due after the late fee and court cost is $1550, most of which I managed to get... all but $420. The other $360 is to cover the costs of Post-op supplies (pads, donut pillow, lube, ice packs, etc) and a trip to the grocery store to stock up on food and necessary items for the next few weeks.

High Priority: $320 (need before 12/2)

Covers: 2 nights hotel stay near hospital, gas to and from location

I live an hour and 45 minutes from the hospital where surgery is taking place. I will go up there on Dec 2 and stay in a hotel for one night with my wife and boyfriend. Dec 3 is surgery at 6am, which I cannot be late for. After surgery, they will drive back without me (cheaper than hotel) and when I get out of the hospital 3 days later, they will drive back up to pick me up and take me home.

Then we will need to drive back to the hospital on 12/8 to stay in a hotel once more, so that we can be there on time the next morning to have my catheter and packing removed on 12/9. After that, we will drive home again.

So that's (ideally) two nights in a hotel (which I've already RSVP'd, pay when I get there) and gas for 6 trips of 110 miles each in a Toyota Camry (I've crunched the MPG numbers too). The numbers add up to about $70 in gas and $250 for the hotel... so $320 total.

Tier 1 (Very Important): $1400 (Need by 12/3)

Covers: Rent for Dec, bills due by 12/3, front tire

Here's where the real costs start to add up... full December rent (due by 12/5), plus late November bills that I can't pay. These bills include car insurance, health insurance (twice), electric, and credit card, all of which are due by early December.

Also included is a rather necessary cost of $80 for one new tire, because my front driver side tire is bald and showing metal threads. Since we will be driving up and back 3 times, it would be catastrophic to blow out that tire which has needed to be replaced for months. It's simply a necessary expense I can't avoid.

(Sidenote: the amount would be higher, but I am expecting a bit of help from a friend who has given us funds for rent before. Should they not come through, I will need about $600 more.)

Tier 2 (Pretty Important): $1000 (Need by about 12/15)

Covers: More bills, groceries, internet and "application fee" (new apt lease)

Supposing I managed to pay all the costs up to this point, I will have a little bit of time to breathe before the next round of bills comes due. These few bills don't affect day to day living, but neglecting to pay them will have unwanted consequences (and possibly cause more fees). Also included is money for another trip to the grocery store, maybe a hot meal or two if I can swing that.

Also, I need internet!!! I currently do not have actual internet, only phone hotspot (which is pretty crappy). I plan on utilizing the internet to stream games and hangouts if I can in an attempt to bring in donations by actually offering something people can watch and be entertained by. I may also stream art commissions if I feel well enough. Plus, I'm going to be stuck at home for two months. My hotspot will run out after about 2 weeks and I'm going to be so bored, so this is to hopefully occupy me and preserve some sanity (whatever is left of it).

Cost also includes a rather unfortunate $150 fee in order to just renew my apartment lease before the end of the year. Yes, you read that right. My apt (which already charges an arm and a leg and which raises the price of rent reliably by $100 or more every year) has a mandatory $150 fee just for the pleasure of re-upping a lease for an apartment I already rent... God Bless America.

Tier 3 (Important, but later): $2000 (Need by 1/6)

Covers: Next round of bills and rent (and maybe pelvic floor therapy)

The bills keep coming. This time, the cost of rent is added to the cost of paying my normal monthly bills (electric, car and health insurance, credit card, etc). These will start to be due about the third week of December through the first week of January.

Of particular importance is rent, which will be increasing for 2025 (surprise!) by about $100 (making the total almost $1400 T_T). This and the electric bill are the most important bills. The other can maybe be pushed back a little, but it's not like I'm going to have the money for it later either! Also my every-3-month phone bill is due ($200), and we'll probably need more food items by now too.

I'm also anticipating something like $200 for pelvic floor therapy, which is recommended by my surgeon. I'd like to do this, as I want to take every step necessary to maximize healing and recovery. This would be needed by 1/6, and I believe it's due up front. Again, I feel this is pretty important.

Total Amount: $5,500

Amount I hope to make Doordashing over the next 10 or so days: $700

Final Amount Needed (minus Doordash): $4800

I am not completely useless just yet. I have about 10 or so days to actually work and try to come up with about $700 to help out towards costs. I've already factored this in.

I'm trying to keep what I'm asking for limited to just what I will without a doubt need. It already sounds like a lot to me, so I deducted what I think I may be able to attain outside of this fundraiser. Hopefully I'm able to get those other funds to help out.

I'm also going to try to make some cash online during that time (streaming/commissions) or maybe my wife will be able to get a job after I'm ok to be left alone. But as of now, $4800 is the amount I'm hoping to get to make this all work.

Final Thoughts:

[For those who wish to donate through Paypal to save on GFM fees, feel free to send it to jaynitigerpaw(@gmail.com) as "Family and Friends". How you get the money to me is not a concern, as long as I get it ;)]

I can't guarantee I'll have a better chance at this if I wait any longer, and every month I go without the correct anatomy is increasingly hard on me mentally and emotionally.

I need to get my bottom surgery done, December 3, 2024. Then I will be very happy, very relieved... and very much grateful to finally, fully be the girl I've always wished to be. :)

Thank you to anyone and everyone who is able to help. I truly appreciate you and send you my love, happy smiles and grateful tears. :)

With sincerity, appreciation and love,

-Jayni Rebecca Rose <3

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