Keeping Lynn at Home
Donation protected
Lynn Bernstein, my beloved wife, is near the end of her life. I do everything I can to care for her, but it never feels like enough for the woman who means everything to me, my partner and soulmate.
Lynn is in the last stages of vascular dementia, a devastating condition which has taken her sight and her ability to walk and care for herself. It has robbed her of many memories and makes it difficult for her to talk and connect with those who love her. The woman who was by my side for over 46 years in every moment – in my work, riding horses, skiing, farming, going to church, visiting family and friends, vacations to warm Hawaii, enjoying a movie and ice cream every Sunday afternoon – now can hardly leave her room.
I am Peter Bernstein and I want to keep my wife Lynn by my side until her final breath. I need your help to continue to take care of Lynn at home. At this time, she is confined to a wheelchair and requires help with all her daily functions. A team of five caregivers – I consider them angels – care for Lynn during the day until about 9:30 pm. After finishing work at night, I take over and stay with Lynn until the morning. I wouldn’t have it any other way, but it's exhausting and depleting. Sleep, when I manage to get some, has become a precious thing.
The picture of Lynn and I on our horses was taken two years ago after Lynn had a stroke and lost her sight. We were celebrating Lynn getting back on her horse with the help of a dear friend who skillfully helped Lynn overcome her fears. Then Lynn’s dementia progressed quickly. Soon after this picture was taken she was only able to go to visit her horse, Floie. Touching her horse brought Lynn pleasure and Floie would nuzzle Lynn. Seeing the sweetness between them brought tears to my eyes. This too has come to an end. Today, Lynn cannot make the trip to the stables. When I go riding, I miss her terribly.
I am heartbroken to see my wife slowly decline. The weight of this burden has affected me tremendously, both physically and emotionally. I feel like I'm on a roller-coaster ride. Some days and nights are fairly good and others can be a nightmare. I do not want to put Lynn in a skilled nursing facility. It's important to me, as well as Lynn, that she's able to come to the end of her life at home – peacefully – with those she loves around her.
Everywhere I go in my community, friends and neighbors ask me how Lynn is doing. Many people remember her kind and gentle spirit and share my sadness and loss. Lynn has served as an example to many with her caring, sweetness and courage. What Lynn is leaving behind as she declines is her "legacy".
Lynn’s needs are growing steadily. Soon she will require more care. That means having caregivers stay with her 24/7. I don't think we're too far away from that happening.
I have gone into debt to afford the care she's receiving now during the day. I am also taking care of all medical expenses outside of those covered by Medicare, which includes a geriatric doctor that makes home visits. I’m convinced this doctor’s expertise has prolonged Lynn’s life and helped her stay pain-free. It's vitally important that I continue with this service.
Also, I am making final arrangements for Lynn after she passes on. Lynn selected her gravesite here in Petaluma some time ago. I want to honor her wishes. I’ve set aside $15,000 from a life insurance policy, but I’m finding that I will need an additional $10,000 to pay for her arrangements.
Currently, my monthly costs for Lynn’s caregiving are $8000 to $10,000 per month. When Lynn starts to need round-the-clock care, and I believe that will be soon, I will need an additional $6200 each month. This means that my monthly caregiving costs will be $14,000 to $16,000, or $168,000 to $192,000 for a year.
To be able to afford full-time care to keep Lynn at home I am going to need help. Any amount you are willing to give will be greatly appreciated and your donation will be carefully spent. As Lynn comes to the end of her life, your thoughtfulness and consideration for helping me keep her close and lovingly cared for means more than I can say.
It is not easy for me to ask for financial help, but for the sake of my dearly loved wife I am reaching out through GoFundMe. I adore Lynn and want to be able to make her life as comfortable and easy as possible until the end. It is important that I receive extra funds soon because I can see that my day of need is near. Your contribution towards helping me achieve my goal is sincerely and greatly appreciated.
Please help me keep my beloved Lynn at home.
God Bless
Peter M. Bernstein
Short Version Video:
Long Version Video:
Lynn is in the last stages of vascular dementia, a devastating condition which has taken her sight and her ability to walk and care for herself. It has robbed her of many memories and makes it difficult for her to talk and connect with those who love her. The woman who was by my side for over 46 years in every moment – in my work, riding horses, skiing, farming, going to church, visiting family and friends, vacations to warm Hawaii, enjoying a movie and ice cream every Sunday afternoon – now can hardly leave her room.
I am Peter Bernstein and I want to keep my wife Lynn by my side until her final breath. I need your help to continue to take care of Lynn at home. At this time, she is confined to a wheelchair and requires help with all her daily functions. A team of five caregivers – I consider them angels – care for Lynn during the day until about 9:30 pm. After finishing work at night, I take over and stay with Lynn until the morning. I wouldn’t have it any other way, but it's exhausting and depleting. Sleep, when I manage to get some, has become a precious thing.
The picture of Lynn and I on our horses was taken two years ago after Lynn had a stroke and lost her sight. We were celebrating Lynn getting back on her horse with the help of a dear friend who skillfully helped Lynn overcome her fears. Then Lynn’s dementia progressed quickly. Soon after this picture was taken she was only able to go to visit her horse, Floie. Touching her horse brought Lynn pleasure and Floie would nuzzle Lynn. Seeing the sweetness between them brought tears to my eyes. This too has come to an end. Today, Lynn cannot make the trip to the stables. When I go riding, I miss her terribly.
I am heartbroken to see my wife slowly decline. The weight of this burden has affected me tremendously, both physically and emotionally. I feel like I'm on a roller-coaster ride. Some days and nights are fairly good and others can be a nightmare. I do not want to put Lynn in a skilled nursing facility. It's important to me, as well as Lynn, that she's able to come to the end of her life at home – peacefully – with those she loves around her.
Everywhere I go in my community, friends and neighbors ask me how Lynn is doing. Many people remember her kind and gentle spirit and share my sadness and loss. Lynn has served as an example to many with her caring, sweetness and courage. What Lynn is leaving behind as she declines is her "legacy".
Lynn’s needs are growing steadily. Soon she will require more care. That means having caregivers stay with her 24/7. I don't think we're too far away from that happening.
I have gone into debt to afford the care she's receiving now during the day. I am also taking care of all medical expenses outside of those covered by Medicare, which includes a geriatric doctor that makes home visits. I’m convinced this doctor’s expertise has prolonged Lynn’s life and helped her stay pain-free. It's vitally important that I continue with this service.
Also, I am making final arrangements for Lynn after she passes on. Lynn selected her gravesite here in Petaluma some time ago. I want to honor her wishes. I’ve set aside $15,000 from a life insurance policy, but I’m finding that I will need an additional $10,000 to pay for her arrangements.
Currently, my monthly costs for Lynn’s caregiving are $8000 to $10,000 per month. When Lynn starts to need round-the-clock care, and I believe that will be soon, I will need an additional $6200 each month. This means that my monthly caregiving costs will be $14,000 to $16,000, or $168,000 to $192,000 for a year.
To be able to afford full-time care to keep Lynn at home I am going to need help. Any amount you are willing to give will be greatly appreciated and your donation will be carefully spent. As Lynn comes to the end of her life, your thoughtfulness and consideration for helping me keep her close and lovingly cared for means more than I can say.
It is not easy for me to ask for financial help, but for the sake of my dearly loved wife I am reaching out through GoFundMe. I adore Lynn and want to be able to make her life as comfortable and easy as possible until the end. It is important that I receive extra funds soon because I can see that my day of need is near. Your contribution towards helping me achieve my goal is sincerely and greatly appreciated.
Please help me keep my beloved Lynn at home.
God Bless
Peter M. Bernstein
Short Version Video:
Long Version Video:
Organizer
Peter M. Bernstein
Organizer
Petaluma, CA