Ava's Transition Fund

Hello, I'm Ava. If you already know who I am it's probably from the work I do in RPGs, or 'cause I know you in person, in which case you almost certainly know that I'm trans. If you didn't, however: I'm trans. 

 

This is something, believe it or not, that I'm quite happy about it. I enjoy being trans, my life has gotten immeasurably better since I realised I was trans. That being said, it is also a state of being that comes with a fair amount of challenges.

 

Its hard to try to explain what dysphoria feels like, so I'm going to assume that if you're the kind of person on the GoFundMe page for a trans woman you at least have some conceptual idea of what it is like. I'm grateful that since beginning to live full-time three years ago, resuming hormones, and finding supportive partners, friends, and family, that the dysphoria I've felt has no longer been so acute, so all-consuming and debilitating.

 

What I face now everyday now is more manageable, yet more Sisyphean. When I wake up, I feel like there is a large gulf between how I feel and how I am perceived, and there is an extreme amount of work that must be done every day to cross that gulf, a performance that must be maintained for me to feel like and be recognised as a person. The energy this requires holds me back from doing so many things. Many days, I cannot muster it at all, and so on those days, I am not a person; I recede, and remain hidden from everything and everyone.

 

Gender confirming surgery would do an incredible amount in reducing the span of that gulf I feel everyday, and improve my quality of  life immensely. While I am grateful for the affordable and easy access to certain forms of trans medical care I receive, the two surgeries that I feel I require most, Vocal Feminization Surgery (VFS) and Facial Feminization Surgery (FFS), are not readily available where I live, and so must be funded out of pocket. Without assistance, the cost of these procedures are prohibitively expensive for me. Being a trans woman of colour that has struggled with mental illness has meant that most of my life has been spent in survival mode, and that has made earning and saving a struggle. 

 

Currently, VFS is my highest priority. My job is 100% talking over the phone, and thus my ability to make a living is directly predicated on how comfortable and confident I am in my voice. The cost of the procedure is about $11,000 CAD, and travel and accommodation is likely to be around $4000 more. As well, in the period following the procedure, I will be unable to speak, and thus unable to work, for 4 weeks; while I may be able to find temporary sources of income during this period, it is precarious.

 

I have saved a portion of the costs needed, and am asking for your help in funding the rest. Beyond that, any donations received will be put towards living expenses and saving for FFS in the future. If you can't donate at this time, I ask that you please share this with a friend or on social media. Everything helps. 

 

Thank you. Here are some pictures of my cat.