Lane's Top Surgery Fund

Hello friends, family, and all others who found their way to this page! My name is Lane— and I am (finally) getting top surgery.

If you have kept up with me over the years, you will not be shocked by this... but if you have not… buckle up!

Yes, I am trans. Yes, I use he/they pronouns. And yes, I am getting a bilateral mastectomy on April 21st, 2023.

There’s a million and one things I could say about my journey, but the TLDR is simple: I have worked my ass off to get to this point in my transition, and now I need to rely on my community to push me across the finish line.

A Little Background

For as long as I can remember, I’ve never felt like my body belonged to me. The ‘woman’ looking back at me in the mirror did not reflect the man I knew I was all along. As a child, these feelings manifested in seemingly minor ways. From refusing to play pretend for any other role besides “Dad”, to stealing my brother's boxers to wear around the house (sorry, Jake!), to insisting on playing baseball because I did not want to play softball ‘with the girls’, there was nothing I wanted more than to be considered one of the boys. I mean seriously… I exclusively played with WWE action figures instead of Barbie’s… are we really that surprised by me coming out? While I may not have had the appropriate vocabulary to articulate my deep seated feelings of gender dysphoria, the feelings persisted nonetheless. The older I got, the more intense the dysphoria became; and boy, did I hate myself because of it.

I think it is important to touch on the substantial amount of trauma and shame that comes hand-in-hand with growing up as a queer person in a small, conservative town. Even as I type this, I am overwhelmed with fear and anxiety for the repercussions my identity has/could have on my immediate family (I ask politely… if you want to be a transphobe, come straight to the source [me] and let them keep their peace). The insurmountable pressure to conform to the cookie-cutter-all-American-life that is embedded into East County culture, and society at large, has the potential to create irreversible psychological damage to queer/trans youth. I am SO fortunate to have found my way to San Francisco at 18, because if I had not… I can assure you I would not be alive to type this today. So, if at this point, you’re still tackling your own homophobia/transphobia, I’d like to implore you to start navigating through the world with empathy at the forefront. Spending my late teens/early 20’s in a new city meant having the freedom to dive into, well, me! I was finally at a place in my life where I could prioritize my own identity over the ideas and expectations other people created for me. I expanded my worldview tenfold, built an entirely new community, and worked incredibly hard to unlearn what I had been taught about people like me growing up.

Admitting to myself (and the world) that I am a trans man is the crux of my life story. It took almost 22 years for me to build up the courage to scream that shit from the rooftops, and I truly would not have it any other way. For the past three years, I have been able to live an authentic, fulfilling life for the first time ever. With the help of HRT and my ever growing chosen family, the profound feeling of gender dysphoria that once felt innate to my existence dwindles as the days go by. Unfortunately, still having man boobs creates a perpetual level of dissociation and body dysmorphia that few people understand. Thus, it’s time to yeet the teets.

The mere thought of getting dressed without putting a binder on brings tears to my eyes. I will no longer live in fear of being clocked if a shirt accentuates my moobs, nor will I have to worry about causing lifelong damage to my ribs/lungs from binding every day. I will be able to go to the beach without a shirt on and feel the sun on my chest for the first time in a long time. Words cannot explain how fortunate I feel to know that in a few short weeks my body and soul will finally align— but I need your help getting there.

The Cost

Fortunately, I have full coverage health insurance through my job (Unionize ASAP, y’all!) so the cost of the actual surgery is not going to be a massive financial burden on me. Where I need fiscal assistance, however, is all in the recovery.

The initial recovery consists of 2-4 weeks at home with little-to-no arm mobility. Since I am just under a month short of my 1 year work anniversary, I do not qualify for paid medical leave, nor do I have enough paid sick time to cover a month of time off. Should I need to be out of office longer than 2 weeks, I will need to take unpaid time off and would be unable to cover the cost of my rent/utilities/day-to-day bills.

In addition to covering the usual cost of living, there are two other large financial burdens I face in this recovery: the cost of materials and the cost of oxygen therapy. As I will be practically immobile in my upper body for a bit, I will need to make my house more accessible. This includes purchasing everything from grab bars to wedge pillows to compression vests to dry shampoo. Living in one of the most expensive cities in the world doesn’t leave me with much extra spending money, so assistance purchasing these physical items would be life-saving.

To be blunt, covering the cost of oxygen therapy is the single biggest financial stressor I am facing. No matter how wonderful your surgeon is, everyone who undergoes top surgery runs the risk of their nipples not grafting back onto their skin. Should my nipples begin to reject, I will immediately start hyperbaric oxygen therapy in an attempt to save my nipples. The problem, however, is that none of the San Francisco locations accept my insurance. I was able to sweet talk my way into the lowest price they have available, which was a quote of $1.1k per session for at least 10 sessions. I’m not sure what 24 year old would be able to afford that on their own, but I am simply not the one. There is no real way to know if this will happen or not, but I would like to plan ahead and have a safety net should I need to start hyperbaric sessions immediately.

If all goes according to plan, I will be back at work after 2 weeks of being on bed rest with both nipples fully reattached to my chest. I want nothing more than to recover without a single speed bump, but I am also trying to realistically plan for disaster before it strikes. Any and all financial contributions are greatly appreciated!!!

**Please note: Unused money donated to this GoFundMe will be split and donated to Transgender Law Center and Trans Lifeline. Both organizations are VERY important in today's sociopolitical climate!**

Other Ways to Help

While a financial safety net is an invaluable resource to have, there are also other ways I’m going to need my people that do not involve money at all!

To be brutally honest, I’m going to need to be baby for a while. For 1-3 weeks of my recovery, I will need to be helped almost 24/7. The severity of my condition will lessen as time goes by, but the first week is going to be really physically taxing on my body. I’ll essentially need someone to help me sit up, go to the bathroom, walk around to circulate my blood, and all things in between. With limited mobility brings the reality that I will no longer be able to cook for myself. Plenty of you have offered to cook dinner for me (to which I am SO thankful), but I’m a gemini… so! In order to keep things on track, I’ve created a Calendly [linked here: https://calendly.com/lanecasey/lanes-top-surgery-recovery] for folks to sign up for “shifts” to assist with physical care/meal delivery post-op. The Calendly has more in-depth information regarding my recovery timeline and the level of care I’ll need at each step, so please read thoroughly before confirming a slot!

Jumping back to me being a gemini… y’all… I’m going to be bored. I’d love to receive a facetime call from an old friend to chat and catch up, or add me on switch (friend code: SW-0283-6071-2738) so we can play games together. Anything to pass the time while I’m bedridden is happily accepted and greatly appreciated.

The most simple and free way to help is to repost! this! link! Boosting to your networks provides an opportunity to ensure my aftercare is taken care of, while simultaneously expanding the amount of money being donated to trans-specific organizations. It’s a win-win!

Final Word

I cannot begin to express my gratitude for the community I have surrounding me. I know people say this all the time, but I would genuinely die if not for the unconditional love and support y’all have shown me time and time again. To anyone who has contributed to my transition, big or small, thank you. To anyone who donates any amount to this GoFundMe, thank you. To anyone who signs up to wipe my ass or send me dinner one night, thank you. Please know that I will not rest until I have returned the favor and then some; I will forever be indebted to all of you.

All love.