The Loss of Richard Stelle Family Support

Hi, my name is Tara Tobin-Rogers and I am asking for help and support for Richard Stelle's family during this difficult time. I am a longtime friend of dear Richard Stelle, Liz Palladino, their daughter, Presley and family. For those of you who knew either Richard, Liz or both, I'm sure you'll agree, to know them is to love them. The picture shown here of Richard always makes me smile. It reminds me of his amazing sense of humor. My impression of him before knowing him was that he was a serious guy. Man, was I wrong! His quick wit was one of many things I've enjoyed in my friendship with him over the years.

Liz and Richard's 30-year union was a true life love story. Both have an amazing gift of storytelling and have shared countless tellings of their shared lives together, including their shared love of the Renaissance era, for example, which included their wedding with the entire wedding party donned in full authentic Renaissance regalia. Whether it be a story of their shared time working together at Lexington School for the Deaf, a story of their daughter shared with beaming pride, or any other, it was clear their marriage was forged in friendship, respect and love for one another.

Richard was one of the most fair-minded, understanding and compassionate people I have ever met. Although you could explain this as a result of his strong faith in God and active ongoing involvement with the Cathedral of the Incarnation in Garden City, or by his graduate studies in Conflict Resolution, etc., either way, he was one of a kind. His strong character was a testament of his innate sense and display of integrity, both professionally and personally; he was the salt of the earth and one that is hard to come by these days.

And Liz is one of the kindest people I have ever met. I have always said she is a litmus test of sorts. How could someone not like Liz? Her optimism and ability to make even the darkest days bright are unmatched. The two together are a treasure only the lucky are and have been blessed to encounter.

The past year has brought several unexpected challenges for the Stelle family, including Richard's untimely health diagnosis last year of Lewy Body Dementia. Although it provided answers to some symptoms Richard was experiencing, it also emphasized the fragility of life and the importance of making time together within a busy life that distracts us from what is truly important. They were able to prioritize time together and do things they had said they would get to eventually, such as whisking off for a quiet weekend together and creating family memories.

Unfortunately, the disease progressed much quicker than the doctors or family expected. At the end of last year, Richard had an unexpected fall and was admitted to an inpatient rehab facility. He contracted COVID and was transferred to a medical hospital. Within two weeks, his health steadily declined and the medical staff began approaching Liz about Palliative Care and end-of-life decisions. The unexpected decline challenged Liz to quickly pivot to make time-sensitive decisions while emotionally adjusting to the unexpected change in prognosis and uncertain future.

Liz honored Richard's request to be home last week for hospice where she was able to care for him. He was peacefully in the comfort of his own home surrounded by those who love him when he passed to greener pastures. Information to celebrate his life will be shared on the newly created Facebook group: Richard Stelle, the Man, the Myth, the Legend.

Liz, Presley and family have received an outpouring of support from countless people Richard has touched over the years. They are overwhelmingly appreciative of all of the support. So many people have reached out asking if there is anything they can do, requests to send dinner or go food shopping, anything to help ease the pain and heartbreak the family is experiencing.

I, too, have been struggling with providing support that could, even in small ways, ease their burden during this time of need. Yet, despite doing everything I can humanly do, it still seems trite and not enough. How could it possibly be enough, after all? I can't imagine I am the only one that feels this way, especially since it relates to Richard and Liz, two of the most selfless, big-hearted and generous people. Neither would ask for anything from anyone. It is with this sentiment, I thought to create this GoFundMe page to:

1 - provide a means for those who are seeking ways to also be able to do something for them and

2 - to find a way to give back to them what they have freely given to others

The next few months ahead will be the most challenging for the family. If you wanted to help provide support here, all monies will be devoted to meals, and expenses to allow Liz and Presley to comfortably take all the time necessary to adjust to life changes to come in the upcoming months.

Thank you in advance to anyone taking the time to read this! Your support is very much appreciated!

Tara