Naomi’s gastric bypass surgery ❤️

Hello to anyone reading this.

My name is Naomi and I am 25 years old.

Starting this fundraiser hasn’t been an easy decision of mine. Accepting help from people isn’t my greatest strong-suit at the best of times, never mind for something as personal as this.

However, after receiving an overwhelming amount of messages on my Instagram account from people offering to help and asking me to reconsider setting this up, I’ve decided to go for it.

Before I tell you about me and why I’ve decided to do this surgery I really cannot stress enough -

**I don’t want anyone to feel obliged to donate and if you would like to, it truly does not matter how small a donation is.**

The fact that ANYONE would like to help me achieve this surgery in a quicker timeframe is the most humbling thing I’ve ever experienced. There truly aren’t words good enough to express the gratitude I feel. ❤️

I have been overweight almost my entire life. As a small child I was a bit chubbier than most other children but it wasn’t until my pre-teens that I slowly started to put more and more weight on.

I don’t remember a time where I didn’t look at myself in a negative light because of this. Where I didn’t hate myself because I was fat. Where I didn’t wish I was thinner. Spending almost my whole life thinking so negatively about myself because of my size became very normal, very quickly.

Throughout my teens I suffered with severe depression and anxiety. I was bullied for the way I looked, felt very out of place and for the majority of 11 years I would self harm each day because that is what I believed I deserved. Being overweight has taken over my life and controlled me beyond words. I have been suicidal more times than I’d like to admit and even though other life situations had a play in that, my weight was always the root to those feelings.

Food quickly became my best friend and worst enemy all at once. It was always there for me no matter what. It would never abandon me like people could but it was also the reason why I was so unhappy. I was on a new diet almost every month, I didn’t eat at school because I was scared that people would laugh at me, sometimes I didn’t eat for days and sometimes I crept downstairs in the middle of the night to binge on anything I could find.

I could honestly write a book on how awful my relationship with food has been in my life but I hope that tells you enough for now.

Thankfully those dark days and negative emotions I had towards myself are becoming a thing of the past and I have been working really hard on learning to love myself for the first time ever.

I fell pregnant in February 2020 with my first baby and it completely changed my mindset. I felt proud of myself and my body for what it was doing, I was empowered by what I was capable of and I genuinely saw myself in a whole different light.

The past two years haven’t been the easiest but I can truly say with my hand on my heart that I am at peace with who I am now. I no longer punish myself for looking a certain way, I no longer wince when I look in a mirror, I no longer think I am worthless because of my size or that I am unlovable because I am fat and I no longer cry and pray to be thin. I love myself for WHO I am and the number on the scales absolutely does not define me.

So here is where my decision for weightloss surgery comes in.

As I got older and as I gained more weight the more food I needed in order to feel full. I was stuck in a constant cycle of eating more to feel full then putting on more weight, feeling more depressed, eating more food, stretching my stomach more, needing to eat more to feel full and so forth.

This cycle has been the hardest thing to try and combat regardless of my mental state. At this point I don’t feel like I have an emotional attachment to food anymore but instead a constant need for it because of the damage I have done to my body by overeating for so long. I always feel hunger and rarely feel satisfied.

In the recent years, I have allowed myself to respond to those feelings of hunger as they naturally happen in order to be kind to myself and to not fall back into that same dangerous cycle I mentioned before.

However, the effect that is having on me physically is now at a point where I’m desperate for change.

I am currently pre-diabetic, an asthmatic who definitely feels the strain on their lungs after just a walk up some stairs, I am in pain as soon as I wake up in my back and legs, my joints constantly feel like they are surrounded by fluid and I am just not physically able to do so many things that, up until 2/3 years ago I couldn’t care less about doing because I didn’t really want to be here full stop.

Now that I am happy and at peace with myself, now that I WANT to live - I want to live in the best version of myself.

I no longer want to just exist. I want to be able to run around with my son and throw him high in the air. I want to run for him in the parents race on sports day. I want to show him the world without having to take a break every five minutes. I want to be apart of his life for as long as I possibly can.

And in order for me to become that version of myself, I believe that weight loss surgery is the best tool to make it happen.

I live in the U.K and more specifically in the highlands of Scotland and to get this surgery done on the NHS is a very long wait. We have limited resources here and the likelihood of this happening anytime soon, especially with Covid, is sadly very slim. To get this surgery done privately in the U.K. is upwards of £8000 and it just isn’t feasible with my family’s financial situation.

I have decided to go for a gastric bypass in Istanbul, Turkey to a hospital called IRMET INTERNATIONAL. I have spent a lot of time researching different hospitals, surgeons and surgeries all in different countries and I believe this is the right choice for me.

The surgery cost is £3200. (+flights)

If we were to save each month it would take us at minimum a year to get the money together.

Being completely honest the thought of having to wait even a year for something I feel so ready for is a little disheartening.

We have considered a loan and really that is our only other option, but the last thing I want to do is put any more pressure on my partner financially and put our family in a situation where money is a real problem.

Bringing it back to everyone that has already reached out to me asking if they can help, I truly cannot thank you enough. From the bottom of my heart.

Even if this fundraiser raises 1% of the amount needed for my surgery, to me that is another day less I’ll have to wait for this next chapter of my life to begin - and for that I am unbelievably greatful.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. - if you know me at all you will know I can’t help but make things long winded. I hope you don’t mind.

One more time - PLEASE do not feel obliged or pressured to donate, like I said, this is a tough thing for me to set up at all, so if all you can offer me is your support and kind thoughts then that is absolutely enough.

Love,

Naomi. X