Philip Michael Coss Memorial Fund
Donation protected
Dear Sir or Ma'am,
Philip Michael Coss passed away unexpectedly on the evening of 21Mar20. He left behind an vast group of people that loved him dearly. His wife, Alex, is expecting their first-born child, Gabriel, in June 2020.
Myself (James Lindstedt) and Jake Salemi were Phil's best friends - a trio, the 3 Musketeers. We are trying to raise both emotional and monetary support for Alex, Gabriel, and the Coss family in the wake of this tragedy.
Jake and I have written our stories about Phil, our background, why we loved him, and what he meant to us - please take a moment to read below.
The beneficiary of this campaign will be Phil's wife, Alexandra Coss.
Stay safe and thank you for stopping by!
----------------------
----------------------
From James Lindstedt:
I first met Philip Michael Coss in the spring of 1997, if my memory serves correctly. My family had recently started attending Kettle Moraine Evangelical Free Church in Delafield, WI. Phil’s Dad, Mike, was the associate pastor at the time. My mother and his father deduced that they each had a son the same age, and they arranged a time for Phil and I to meet. We became immediate friends and the rest, as they say, is history. We spent time at the Oconomowoc City Beach together, laughed together, got into mischief together, and listened to music together. We pontificated about life as young know-it-all teenagers do so adeptly. I met new friends through Phil, because of Phil. Several of those friends remain my best friends to this day. The lines between the Coss and Lindstedt families became difficult to distinguish. Phil, Jake, and I attended Lake Country Lutheran High School together – much like Jake, I begged my parents to let me go to high school where my best friends were.
Phil, a full-spectrum music lover, fostered a love of music in me that I maintain to this day. He had tremendous musical talent himself, always shredding on his guitar. I was not blessed with that talent, and I always admired it in him. Music was a theme that underscored our entire friendship – it was frequently a topic of conversation or the subject of a text message thread. Phil was just a cool dude, that’s all there is to it. If there is a rock star among my close group of friends, it is unequivocally Phil Coss.
Phil was the sort of man that everybody wanted to be friends with. Throw a stone in the Lake Country area of southeastern Wisconsin – you’ll likely hit someone that was touched by Phil. He exuded intelligence, class, and compassion. He had significant and multi-faceted talents, yet he was humble about all of them. He was approachable. He was friendly and he could bring people out of their shell, myself included. He had an infectious laugh that was easily triggered – a wonderful sense of humor. It was difficult to be in a foul mood in his presence. I’ve never known a person that was so universally loved. Myself and our mutual friends could write an anthology of entertaining and, at times, eyebrow-raising stories.
If I had to summarize our friendship in one word, I would say that it was rich. It was rich with laughter, mutual friendships, loyalty, adventures, and infallible brotherly love. There was a special bond there that can only happen with people that I cautiously let inside my wall, my outer perimeter. Phil unwaveringly remained a member of my elite inner circle of friends until March 21st, 2020. My best friend died that night. He got ripped from so many lives, lives where a colossal void now resides. I got the call at 10:30 AM, March 22nd, as I sat having Sunday morning coffee with my girlfriend. I could not process what had happened that day, but in the subsequent days the new reality started to slowly creep in like frigid seawater that life is now just…different. I don’t have my guy anymore. My original crew had been reduced by 33.3%. As I write this, I am wrestling with the notion more feverishly than ever. I have grasped, swung, wept, raged, disbelieved, despaired, and reached, yet have come up empty-handed.
We’ve lost a best friend, a son, a brother, a husband, an uncle, and a father. To compound the devastation that all parties are enduring, Phil’s passing has occurred at an unprecedented time of unrest and uncertainty in the world. To even have a semblance of a funeral was a cautious and clandestine operation, adding insult to injury. People are collectively frustrated and on-edge to begin with; the death of a dearly loved one could reasonably cause a grieving party to approach the edge. Now is the time to rally around one another and keep punching. The Coss family is preparing to celebrate the birth of Phil and Alex’s son, Gabriel Philip Michael Coss. He is expected to join us in early June. Supporting one another in the wake of Phil’s passing is imperative. Love and support for one another are the primary mechanisms of damage control. I respectfully implore anyone that reads this to extend a show of love. Please support the Coss family, whether it be a hug, a text, a warm meal, or a donation.
Be strong for one another. Fight fiercely for one another. Be good to one another. That is what Phil would want.
To Alex and the Coss family – I will be at your beckon call, standing at parade rest.
I would like to conclude with a quote from a song that Phil and I loved.
“And you used to speak so easy
Now you're afraid to talk to me
It's like walking with the wounded
Carrying that weight way too far
Concrete pulled you down so hard
Out there with the wounded
We're missing you”
Very Respectfully,
James Mitchell Lindstedt
29Mar20
----------------------
----------------------
From Jake Salemi:
I first met Phil Coss as a child way back in 4th grade at Country Christian School (CCS) in Nashotah, Wisconsin. He was visiting CCS and planning to join us at school in grade 5. We were fast friends and soon inseparable. It was a typical childhood friendship filled with sleepovers and constant weekend hangouts that quickly blossomed into a brotherhood. In our youth a significant amount of time was spent building forts, playing basketball, and laughing at dumb things.
Once our time at CCS came to a conclusion in 2001 we both had planned to attend public high school together, but the Coss family had other plans for Phil. They wanted Phil’s education to be based in a strong Christian faith and decided to send him to an upstart high school at the time called Lake Country Lutheran. I immediately pleaded with my mother for her to enroll me in the same school. At this point I couldn’t bear the thought of attending a new school without my best friend and safety net, Phil Coss. Thank God I was able to convince my mother to continue my Christian education with Phil. In my youth Phil gave me confidence and helped me foster a love for music that remains today. As our close mutual friend, James Lindstedt, once said, “Jake and Phil were a packaged deal.” We were inseparable and blessed to have one another at vulnerable points throughout our adolescence. As we entered young adulthood this friendship blossomed from childhood play to deep conversations and a family bond. I bare a beautiful scar on my left forearm from the day James, Phil and myself decided we were no longer “just” friends, we were family. We were brothers through a quick slice and some sharing of blood amongst one another. Nothing changed that day though, we were brothers long before we decided to make it blood.
Phil remained a constant in my life through all stages. He was never further than phone a call away, and he always gave the most sound advice, support, and love to me in my times of challenge. When I had moments of doubt Phil re-assured me of my capabilities and instilled a confidence in me that was unwavering. Phil was like this to everyone he interacted with. He treated all people with the same love, kindness and supportive tone he did to those closest to him. He taught me what empathy truly means, and now makes me want to strive to be the same kind, loving, unjudging person Phil was every day.
My life changed forever on March 21, 2020 as Phil entered into heaven to be with our Creator. He has found his peace, but has left my life and so many others, with a void that cannot be filled. I’m still struggling to understand what life without my best friend entails, but I am reassured by the knowledge that I will see my brother again one day. I choose now to remain strong for Phil’s distraught wife, Alex, and their unborn son, Gabriel Philip Michael Coss. I want to be the rock for Alex and the Coss family that Phil always was in my life. I pledge myself to help in anyway possible, and one of the first things James and I concluded would help is this GoFundMe account. The funds collected here will allow Alex to provide stability for her and Gabriel in the coming months. In addition to this fundraiser we will be establishing a 529 account for Gabriel’s education. I implore anyone that was touched by Phil to support Alex and the Coss family through prayers, kind words, hugs, and if you are moved to do so, a donation here.
To Alex, Gabriel and the Coss family – I am here to laugh, cry, and support you all in anyway you ask.
All of my love,
Jake Salemi
30Mar20
Philip Michael Coss passed away unexpectedly on the evening of 21Mar20. He left behind an vast group of people that loved him dearly. His wife, Alex, is expecting their first-born child, Gabriel, in June 2020.
Myself (James Lindstedt) and Jake Salemi were Phil's best friends - a trio, the 3 Musketeers. We are trying to raise both emotional and monetary support for Alex, Gabriel, and the Coss family in the wake of this tragedy.
Jake and I have written our stories about Phil, our background, why we loved him, and what he meant to us - please take a moment to read below.
The beneficiary of this campaign will be Phil's wife, Alexandra Coss.
Stay safe and thank you for stopping by!
----------------------
----------------------
From James Lindstedt:
I first met Philip Michael Coss in the spring of 1997, if my memory serves correctly. My family had recently started attending Kettle Moraine Evangelical Free Church in Delafield, WI. Phil’s Dad, Mike, was the associate pastor at the time. My mother and his father deduced that they each had a son the same age, and they arranged a time for Phil and I to meet. We became immediate friends and the rest, as they say, is history. We spent time at the Oconomowoc City Beach together, laughed together, got into mischief together, and listened to music together. We pontificated about life as young know-it-all teenagers do so adeptly. I met new friends through Phil, because of Phil. Several of those friends remain my best friends to this day. The lines between the Coss and Lindstedt families became difficult to distinguish. Phil, Jake, and I attended Lake Country Lutheran High School together – much like Jake, I begged my parents to let me go to high school where my best friends were.
Phil, a full-spectrum music lover, fostered a love of music in me that I maintain to this day. He had tremendous musical talent himself, always shredding on his guitar. I was not blessed with that talent, and I always admired it in him. Music was a theme that underscored our entire friendship – it was frequently a topic of conversation or the subject of a text message thread. Phil was just a cool dude, that’s all there is to it. If there is a rock star among my close group of friends, it is unequivocally Phil Coss.
Phil was the sort of man that everybody wanted to be friends with. Throw a stone in the Lake Country area of southeastern Wisconsin – you’ll likely hit someone that was touched by Phil. He exuded intelligence, class, and compassion. He had significant and multi-faceted talents, yet he was humble about all of them. He was approachable. He was friendly and he could bring people out of their shell, myself included. He had an infectious laugh that was easily triggered – a wonderful sense of humor. It was difficult to be in a foul mood in his presence. I’ve never known a person that was so universally loved. Myself and our mutual friends could write an anthology of entertaining and, at times, eyebrow-raising stories.
If I had to summarize our friendship in one word, I would say that it was rich. It was rich with laughter, mutual friendships, loyalty, adventures, and infallible brotherly love. There was a special bond there that can only happen with people that I cautiously let inside my wall, my outer perimeter. Phil unwaveringly remained a member of my elite inner circle of friends until March 21st, 2020. My best friend died that night. He got ripped from so many lives, lives where a colossal void now resides. I got the call at 10:30 AM, March 22nd, as I sat having Sunday morning coffee with my girlfriend. I could not process what had happened that day, but in the subsequent days the new reality started to slowly creep in like frigid seawater that life is now just…different. I don’t have my guy anymore. My original crew had been reduced by 33.3%. As I write this, I am wrestling with the notion more feverishly than ever. I have grasped, swung, wept, raged, disbelieved, despaired, and reached, yet have come up empty-handed.
We’ve lost a best friend, a son, a brother, a husband, an uncle, and a father. To compound the devastation that all parties are enduring, Phil’s passing has occurred at an unprecedented time of unrest and uncertainty in the world. To even have a semblance of a funeral was a cautious and clandestine operation, adding insult to injury. People are collectively frustrated and on-edge to begin with; the death of a dearly loved one could reasonably cause a grieving party to approach the edge. Now is the time to rally around one another and keep punching. The Coss family is preparing to celebrate the birth of Phil and Alex’s son, Gabriel Philip Michael Coss. He is expected to join us in early June. Supporting one another in the wake of Phil’s passing is imperative. Love and support for one another are the primary mechanisms of damage control. I respectfully implore anyone that reads this to extend a show of love. Please support the Coss family, whether it be a hug, a text, a warm meal, or a donation.
Be strong for one another. Fight fiercely for one another. Be good to one another. That is what Phil would want.
To Alex and the Coss family – I will be at your beckon call, standing at parade rest.
I would like to conclude with a quote from a song that Phil and I loved.
“And you used to speak so easy
Now you're afraid to talk to me
It's like walking with the wounded
Carrying that weight way too far
Concrete pulled you down so hard
Out there with the wounded
We're missing you”
Very Respectfully,
James Mitchell Lindstedt
29Mar20
----------------------
----------------------
From Jake Salemi:
I first met Phil Coss as a child way back in 4th grade at Country Christian School (CCS) in Nashotah, Wisconsin. He was visiting CCS and planning to join us at school in grade 5. We were fast friends and soon inseparable. It was a typical childhood friendship filled with sleepovers and constant weekend hangouts that quickly blossomed into a brotherhood. In our youth a significant amount of time was spent building forts, playing basketball, and laughing at dumb things.
Once our time at CCS came to a conclusion in 2001 we both had planned to attend public high school together, but the Coss family had other plans for Phil. They wanted Phil’s education to be based in a strong Christian faith and decided to send him to an upstart high school at the time called Lake Country Lutheran. I immediately pleaded with my mother for her to enroll me in the same school. At this point I couldn’t bear the thought of attending a new school without my best friend and safety net, Phil Coss. Thank God I was able to convince my mother to continue my Christian education with Phil. In my youth Phil gave me confidence and helped me foster a love for music that remains today. As our close mutual friend, James Lindstedt, once said, “Jake and Phil were a packaged deal.” We were inseparable and blessed to have one another at vulnerable points throughout our adolescence. As we entered young adulthood this friendship blossomed from childhood play to deep conversations and a family bond. I bare a beautiful scar on my left forearm from the day James, Phil and myself decided we were no longer “just” friends, we were family. We were brothers through a quick slice and some sharing of blood amongst one another. Nothing changed that day though, we were brothers long before we decided to make it blood.
Phil remained a constant in my life through all stages. He was never further than phone a call away, and he always gave the most sound advice, support, and love to me in my times of challenge. When I had moments of doubt Phil re-assured me of my capabilities and instilled a confidence in me that was unwavering. Phil was like this to everyone he interacted with. He treated all people with the same love, kindness and supportive tone he did to those closest to him. He taught me what empathy truly means, and now makes me want to strive to be the same kind, loving, unjudging person Phil was every day.
My life changed forever on March 21, 2020 as Phil entered into heaven to be with our Creator. He has found his peace, but has left my life and so many others, with a void that cannot be filled. I’m still struggling to understand what life without my best friend entails, but I am reassured by the knowledge that I will see my brother again one day. I choose now to remain strong for Phil’s distraught wife, Alex, and their unborn son, Gabriel Philip Michael Coss. I want to be the rock for Alex and the Coss family that Phil always was in my life. I pledge myself to help in anyway possible, and one of the first things James and I concluded would help is this GoFundMe account. The funds collected here will allow Alex to provide stability for her and Gabriel in the coming months. In addition to this fundraiser we will be establishing a 529 account for Gabriel’s education. I implore anyone that was touched by Phil to support Alex and the Coss family through prayers, kind words, hugs, and if you are moved to do so, a donation here.
To Alex, Gabriel and the Coss family – I am here to laugh, cry, and support you all in anyway you ask.
All of my love,
Jake Salemi
30Mar20
Organizer and beneficiary
James Lindstedt
Organizer
Oconomowoc, WI
Alexandra Coss
Beneficiary