Help Us Leave A Dangerous Living Situation

Hi all.

I’ve been avoiding asking for help like this for a long time, but that isn’t an option anymore.

My mom and I are trying to get out of an extremely unhealthy and unsafe environment. We live in a small, two-bedroom trailer with my father, who controls, manipulates, and belittles us—especially my mom—on a daily basis. He’s incredibly verbally abusive and frequently threatens physical violence. The trailer is falling apart—mold, water damage, broken floors, a collapsing ceiling, and a bathroom we can barely use. On top of that, my father refuses to maintain even basic hygiene, to clean up after himself or his cats, or contribute to repairs and bills. 

(The photo above shows just one part of our ceiling—severely damaged and growing mold. It’s been like this for a long time, and there’s little we can do to fix it while we’re still here.)

We do what we can to keep the small spaces we do have clean and safe, but it’s incredibly difficult.

This environment has severely worsened my OCD, which I’ve struggled with for over 10 years. I’m doing my best to get better and build a future, but it’s almost impossible to heal while still surrounded by the very things that trigger me daily.

My mom has one room that barely fits her desk for work, the futon she sleeps on, and our cat. My “bedroom” is the living room, where I spend all of my time with our dog, and also sleep on a futon. The master bedroom—where the only “usable” bathroom is—is completely monopolized by my father’s junk, clutter, and mess. Accessing it is difficult, to say the least.

We’ve been working hard to save—cutting costs, sacrificing where we can—but it’s never enough, fast enough. Every time we get close, something comes up: car repairs, medical issues, or just the cost of surviving in a space we don’t have any real say in. My father’s refusal to work and our living situation has put us in debt and we don’t know how to get out.

I’ll be honest: even though it may sound dramatic, every day here is torture.

We’ve both tried to stay strong under the weight of this situation, but it’s taken a toll. My mom’s physical health is suffering—stress-related issues have worsened, and her blood sugar levels have become harder to manage under this kind of pressure. She’s always put everyone else first. She doesn’t deserve this. She deserves peace, rest, and stability. So do our pets. 

I’m not asking for anything extravagant—just help getting to a clean, safe home where we can finally breathe after years of emotional and mental abuse. A place where we don’t have to leave for hours every night just to escape the smells and the stress. A place where healing is possible.

We’ve both held on to hope for a better future. I still believe there’s a way out—there has to be.

Anything you can contribute would mean the world to us. And if you can’t donate, even sharing this would mean more than you know.

Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts.

— DD