Sandye's - 1 Year of Care Fund

Hello All, Kathie Snyder here, with an update on Momma!  

In case you are just learning of all this - I am the 7th of 8 children, blessed to be from 2 wonderful parents, Ben and Sandye Gorsuch.   Our beloved father and family patriarch, Ben, has recently passed on and left me in charge of their estate.  It has been a very difficult time for all of us, he is missed terribly.

Before he left this world, he also asked that I take the responsibility of ensuring the best possible care for his TRUE LOVE, our 89 year old mother, Sandye, who is unfortunately afflicted with the horrible disease, Dementia.

Those of you who have had the pleasure of meeting my parents will know I am speaking the truth when I say they were truly one of the friendliest, kindest, funniest and most generous couples on God's green earth!   I have been going through their finances and discovered that, even on the very tight budget they lived on, they had been giving what they could to several of their favorite charities. 

My siblings and I are doing all we can - none of us are made of money either, so that is why we are humbly requesting the help of like-minded and kind-hearted souls such as yourselves who may be able to relate to our situation.

Momma was here when Daddy passed on 11/28/15 and was in the moment - completely lucid and "with us" as we all surrounded him laughing and telling stories and holding each other tight.  She was the last one to give him a final hug and was able to tell him she loved him and then cried with us as we all realized his chest would not rise again for another breath.    

It was quite a beautiful moment - exactly what Dad wanted - surrounded by his true love and all his kids!  

That was nearly two months ago and it is still so very heart-wrenching to visit Momma, who has absolutely no memory of losing the love of her life at all !    It has been indescribably sad to deal with  - he was her husband and best friend for over 67 years and she is now beginning to doubt all of that as "he has not been to see me!"   It is just an awful feeling to have to lie, but there is no other way to spare her going through the grief of it all time and time again.

If anyone of you has cared for someone with Alzheimer's or any form of Dementia, you understnad how very, very difficult that is.  You cannot tell her every 10 minutes that he has passed - that is a terrible thing to put her - and yourself - through that over and over!!  

Then we have the community... I can tell you, when chosing a memory care community for your own loved one; finding one you feel comfortable with and can trust to care for your dear, sweet, unknowing, precisous parent in any way that even remotely resembles how YOU would do it, is a very trying and expensive undertaking!

The newest development is that, while she is beginning to recognize and feel a bit more comfortable in her new surroundings during the day, she is having "episodes" every evening.  When sundowner's hits after dinner - and all the day's activities that keep her "engaged" are through - she grows bored and agitated and that is when she truly needs the help!

That said, our goal has changed a bit - now we believe the answer is to have someone with her, one on one, in the evenings and the home simply does not have the manpower to provide that.  SO, what we truly need help with now is to hire a private person to be with her so she is not left alone in the evenings and she won't roam the halls alone, or worse try to do things without assistance and fall (already done that 3 times) and so she will be able to thrive!!

We are at the end of our financial ropes, and your help would be so sincerely appreciated!!   I am sending out this update to request your kindness and generousity because our funds are dwindling  very quickly and we truly do not want to have to move Momma out of the facility we had chosen into a nursing facility that takes medicaid as she is just beginning to learn all the faces and become comfortable, not to mention, losing the house - or anything else we are trying to liquidate - to our wonderful government!

Assuming you are still reading this, you must've loved our parents as much as we do and you must agree our Momma deserves the best life we can give her - your generous hearts and donations are appreciated beyond words!!  

Our thanks and prayers go out to each of you and your families' as well.  May God Bless and Keep You All!

Kathie