IVF Fund for Pamela & Enda

Hello Everyone,

My name is Toni Thomas and I am here to help raise funds for my very dear friends, Pamela & Enda. They so desperately want a baby, and we all know they would make amazing parents. Sadly, after multiple pregnancies ending in miscarriage, they are still hopeful and determined to have a baby, and they just need our help, help from the ones that know and love them the most. For all of you that know Pamela and Enda, you know they deserve the baby they have been praying for. Please help us with your donations! 

Thank you in advance,  and please continue to read Pamela's story. 




Pamela's Words:
I have always wanted to be a mother, it was like I came out of my mother's womb as a mom. I’ve always been very motherly and have three younger brothers that I helped take care of for their entire childhood - with my youngest brother being as a second mother to him.

I never really saw Enda around children, let alone change those dirty diapers, or nappies as he calls them.
Enda was a natural with our nephew; I fell more in love with him seeing how great he was with him. Enda is like a big kid and has always been very giving to all kids that he comes in contact with. I have no doubt in my mind that he would make an excellent dad. 

Well, time has slipped away and unfortunately my clock is ticking louder now more than ever. I feel like my time is running out.

I’ll begin my story on my 15th birthday, on the exact day- happy birthday to me. I was in the hospital, I was petrified and was about to have major surgery on my brain, I had a very large tumor on my pituitary gland--I had NO IDEA of the seriousness or the consequences that I would face later down the road. I had the tumor removed and a very small fraction of my pituitary gland was left behind. The tumor was benign I was told, but I had no idea what that meant. I didn’t know what this “master gland” was capable of or how this would affect me for the rest of my life.

At first I regularly saw an endocrinologist and was on multiple medications-even had to go down to the nurse at school. I graduated high school, still with not having a period nor had I developed; again I never knew the consequences that this would cause later on in life.

In my 20’s I had started seeing a gynecologist and was “suppose to” take birth control in order to get my period. Well, hello, how cool, “I” could actually control this annoying thing that all females went through every single month??!! So, of course I would only take it here and there, I mean who actually “wants” to have this annoying thing. Again, I never thought of the repercussions that I would face later in life.

Let’s fast forward to my early 30’s. I go back to school, get married and begin talking to my new husband, aka the love of my life-Enda. We decide to go the the local known “best of the best” fertility specialists to check all this out and see what our options were and what insurance covered, if anything.

Now, of course our main problem that we have encountered countless times are insurance companies and lack of infertility coverage. So, we go to this doctor to check everything out, our options and prices. Just to even get into the office a $250 payment was required- just to “talk” with him. Enda and I mostly talked with the office coordinator to discuss our financial options. The actual doctor discussion was brief. I did try to explain to him my health history and all about my pituitary issues but all he kept saying was “we’ll get you there.” He said he didn't need to know all of that. I said to myself: “how can he help me if he doesn’t know all about my health history.”

We tried clomid first and I did not respond to this medication. Then we tried an IUI procedure just one time, again we have always had the pressure for this to have to work the very first time, it put A LOT of pressure on us; we did not achieve a pregnancy. These procedures often never work on the first try, but we have never been able to try more than once at a time.

So, we signed up for a payment plan, $1,000 payment up front and $250 a month we paid to try IVF. Somebody had actually donated the medications- we were over the moon because therer was no way we could afford these shots. One of these shots can be as expensive as $3,000, not to mention the expense of the procedure.

Well, three eggs fertilized and they were transferred. We achieved a pregnancy, we were ecstatic- it was so surreal that our dream was finally coming true! 

We got as far as 11 weeks and then there was no heart beat, we were devastated. Had we known that miscarriage was extremely high, we would never have announced it to the world, but we couldn't help it. Another life lesson learned.

Well, around $6,000 later and still no baby. We had to again put our dream on hold due to the financial burden.

Now, right from the beginning,  my sister’s best friend had suggested a different doctor, Dr. Badawy. He was more personable and got to know everything about you is what she told us. We made an appointment and went in to chat with him. This was four years later by now and my clock is getting even louder at this stage in our baby journey.

We met with this adorable brilliant-minded man and fell in love. Not only did he stress that my age was not an issue, he did not want to talk money what-so-ever. Oh, and one of his many specialities just so happens to be the PITUITARY GLAND!

We had an extensive visit and he asked anything and everything about my health history. He actually was quite puzzled as to how this "other doctor" could pump me with these medications, including a steroid which really got him wondering with not knowing exactly what was going on up in my head with my pituitary gland; how could he put me on a steroid or know how my body would respond without doing a little background on my health history? He sent me to an endocrinologist to have multiple tests completed.

Everything came back looking “normal” just a few levels would take some manipulating and tweaking due to my unique situation. I started crying when I heard that I the reason that I could not get pregnant was in fact due to hypopituitarism and not infertility. I felt a little bit more “normal.” Just a little....

We did a couple of IUI procedures and two times achieved a pregnancy, but I miscarried again. We could never try an IVF, again because of money and it was insanely discouraging and I was getting older.

I was introduced to a program called CompassionCare that offered discounted medication- we were approved for 50% savings! Finally, we got some good news! However, it is still around $800 with this wonderful discount and this is just for the medications.

We've had our share of tough times but our love is so strong that we can survive anything together. Enda was a struggling immigrant that came here from Ireland that was determined and focused to make something for himself without ever giving up. All he ever wanted to do in this country was work. But, then after marrying his best friend, it was to provide for his wife.

Now, Enda is a United States citizen, has a great job/career. Pamela has a great perspective on a new career and has interviewed and ‘hopefully’ after her second interview will hear some wonderful news. Finally everything is falling into place.

So, this is where we’re at and we need to get going on this before its too late and our opportunity is lost forever.

We desperately cannot wait any longer to at least ‘try’ to fulfill our life-long dream of becoming parents.

Is this the be all and end all, that we will not survive unless we  have a baby, no, but we at least want to be able to "try" before its too late. We are praying for your help and donations to help our dreams of becoming parents come true! We love you all. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts!!