Support Brian and Brandon's Return Journey to Stability

I’m Brian Gorman. I am 75, single, self-employed as a leadership coach, and the sole support for my disabled adult son Brandon who lives with me. We are asking for your support. Here’s why.

Brandon and I met through our love for photography. Soon after, I helped him navigate a summer of homelessness the first time his birth mother threw him out. At her request, I assisted him with SAT prep as well as college and scholarship applications and accompanied him on campus visits. I coached him on handling a sexual predator that was attempting to groom him.

Two years after we met, in Spring 2011, I received a phone call from Brandon. His birth mother had given him three hours to get out of the house. As we talked, I could hear her in the background; it was clear that she no longer wanted a gay son in her life. There was not a moment’s hesitation. I told him what he should try to take (birth certificate, social security card, medications, computer, phone, etc.). I was in New Jersey; he was in Massachusetts, so I arranged a hotel room for him, rented a car, and drove up. The next day, we met with his guidance counselor. I had to find him a place to live in the school district, and I did. Three months later, he graduated and moved in with me. Two years later, more than eleven years ago, I legally adopted him.

One of the first books Brandon shared with me after we met was "The Body Keeps Score," describing the ways in which trauma impacts every organ in the body. When Brandon arrived in our home, he had survived many years of abuse at the hands of his birth and step families. Then he developed multiple chronic conditions including Fibromyalgia, diabetic peripheral polyneuropathy, and migraines. Because he was already immunocompromised, when Covid hit, he spent the first several months never leaving the apartment. His first bout of Covid in November 2020 was a near death experience resulting in long Covid, affecting his recall and his balance. Since then, there have been more bouts with Covid, gradual hearing loss, POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome), and sustaining a concussion in November 2024 from which he is still recovering. He lives in constant pain ranging from uncomfortable to unbearable, resulting in Brandon regularly needing medical ketamine IV infusions performed by medical specialists to provide him with pain relief.

I was 61 when I took Brandon in. I had not planned on having children, and as a result of my own varied career path (higher education, management consulting, non-profit work, photography, curriculum development), I had just started to build a retirement nest egg. This allowed me to support Brandon as he completed his undergraduate degree with a 3.9 GPA. I was working for myself, and as entrepreneurial incomes do, it was a rollercoaster. We rode it together.

Over the past four years, I went from a part-time contract coach to a full-time contract coach and Vice President for Program Development at Quantuvos. By a year ago, I was able to start building a nest egg again. Then at the end of October, Quantuvos closed. My last coaching payment was at the end of August. My last VP stipend was in September.

Since that time, I have been working to rebuild my client base. I refreshed my website to reflect all I have learned and achieved since starting work with Quantuvos. I took over the Qonversations podcast, rebranded it, and continue to produce it; there are now 111 episodes. I developed a “Coaching Skills for Leaders” program and reached out to well over 100 connections seeking clients and referrals. I joined another coaching platform and contracted with another coaching company.

I have sought government support only to be told that there are no “short-term aid” programs, and that due to my income, we are ineligible for the programs that do exist. The circumstances of Brandon’s medical expenses are apparently irrelevant.

We have stretched our savings as far as possible. I believe that we are at the bottom of this rollercoaster drop, but we need your support to make it to a place where we will be self-sustaining again. My social security covers our rent. Monthly bills for electric/heat, phone, and internet for my home-based business run $700. Brandon’s medical expenses until his co-payment is covered are estimated at $3,000 a month based on last year's out-of-pocket. We are currently spending about $800/month on food.

We are grateful for your support at any level.