The Sausage Must Go: Bottom Surgery in San Francisco

Dearest Friends and Enemies,

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to all of the love and support that I have been receiving in my birthday week and beyond. I am at the point in my journey where I have no choice but to spill the tea and humbly ask for financial support from the community.

As a refresher for those who have been following along, I came out as non-binary in 2018 (started using they, changed my name in 2019, and started testosterone hormone therapy in 2021. For the last 37 years, I’ve suffered from persistent body and gender dysmorphia regarding my man bits. Comrades: the sausage must go. On Memorial Day weekend, I made the decision to start the process of pursuing bottom surgery. I am about to enter my final year of graduate school, so I really need to take care of this intense procedure before I reenter the workforce.

In March 2020, the COVID pandemic brought my decade-long career as a chef to a close. A week before the shutdown I started my MBA program. So, I’ll have been in grad school from March 2020 - April 2025. My graduate program is offering me no leave or support of any kind for my surgical transition. I tried to take time away from school for myself and they informed me that there's no such provision for medical leave anymore. To avoid irreparable financial harm, I have to stay enrolled through the end of April 2025. That leaves summer break (August), winter break (December), or post-graduation (May 2025) as the only windows of time that meet the demands of my academic schedule. The last thing I want to do is delay this procedure until I start my first job in my field, only to have to take medical leave down the line. Living in Southeast Wisconsin, the closest qualified surgeon in Chicago couldn’t even get me in for a consultation until January 2025.

I am blessed to say that on Friday, August 9th, 2024, I will be undergoing nullification surgery at the Crane Center in San Francisco, CA. It’s incredible and surreal how quickly I have gotten through the process from personal decision to having a surgical date on the books. But, this presents once-in-a-lifetime financial implications for my family. KJ and I have to spend the entire month of August in San Francisco for pre-op care, surgery, and three weeks of post-op appointments. Meaning, in addition to my $8500 out-of-pocket maximum for my health insurance benefits, we have to pay for flights, an entire month in an extended-stay hotel, and living expenses in one of the most expensive cities in North America. KJ has to take FMLA from work that entire month to be my primary caregiver after surgery, which means we’re out his wages too.

All in, we’re looking at $15,000 in expenses over the next eight weeks. I’m screwed without the help and support from the community. Asking for help is hard, but this is the most important and completely daunting thing I’ve done in my 37 years of life. PLEASE DONATE AND SHARE so that the second half of my life isn’t as heavy as the first.

Happy Pride Month. If you support trans lives, please consider supporting mine. Cashapp $borgpup

The sausage must go.

Your friend,

Axl Ibiza