Emergency Fund for Tomasz Wojtasik
Donation protected
THE SUMMARY
Tomek, a young man from Poland with a US green card, is forced out as gay by his privacy-invading parents a few weeks before his 21st birthday. He is thrown out, and has to figure out where to sleep, eat, and how to go back to university in September--all of which is somewhat dangerous, and a very tight economic proposition. He needs a financial safety net, now.
THE STORY
I wish that summary was just another article you read in your local news, or just another story on TV. It isn't. It is very real and happening to one of my friends.
I don’t think many people know of the rug-pull that has happened with Tomasz Wojtasik's parents’ actions, or of his diligent efforts to gain lots of work hours, or how all of the compounded complex trauma of this and his growing up makes getting on with life a big hurdle.
Tomek has helped and raised funds for LGBTIQ2+ organizations. But I feel that those of us who are his friends and supporters ought to be raising some buffer funds for *him.* Understandably, he feels embarrassed by that, but I don’t feel there is any need to be. He is deeply grateful to his *chosen* family for their support throughout the transition, and thankful to still be able to talk with his siblings.
A fair number of Tomek's friends have known he is gay, but his parents and a significant portion of his support system did not. Tomek had been taking a year off of school to work through the stress of being gay and dealing with the kind of intense religious system his parents work in, living at home and working as many hours as he could pull at Starbucks.
When Tomek's parents recently began to go through his belongings and discovered a Valentine's Day card from his boyfriend, along with "reports" from other members of their religious group back in Boston, they discovered he is gay. They decided to make him choose between two terrible options.
The first option they gave him was to -- either in the US or back in Poland -- undergo "reparative conversion treatment" to become an "ex-gay" (Sexual Orientation Change Efforts -- condemned as abusive quackery by every major professional mental health, professional medical, and professional educational association, as you can see in the notes at the end).
The other option was to leave home immediately.
Tomek left.
His minimal Chicago support system has helped him with temporary housing, but he is still in need of a safe sublet, reasonably near work, until he returns to school in September. His tuition is paid by scholarship, but living expenses are based on what he can draw in from work. Just having turned 21, Starbucks is his best option right now. His parents provide no buffer, no base of funds, and no support. Tomek is a permanent US resident (Green card) in process of seeking citizenship, but he is therefore not eligible for most Federal and State support programs.
This is a story that gets played out far too often, and the pitfalls for the thrown away young gay person are numerous and, frankly, wind up making too many headlines.
Tomek's upper division advisor at college, Alyn Wallace, and I (Luke Adams) have put together this funding drive to try to provide Tomek with some kind of safety net. None of us should ever have to face this. Especially not because of an ideology that defies rationality and that is completely inhumane. We all deserve better, and faith demands we be better. We are asking you to dig deep and give what you can to help this one promising young man keep from falling through the cracks.
________________________
FOR THE RECORD
The professional organizations on record against SOCE: American Psychiatric Association; American Psychological Association; American Psychoanalytic Association; American Counseling Association; America Association for Marriage and Family Therapy; National Association of Social Workers; American College of Physicians; American Medical Association; National Association of School Psychologists; American School Counselor Association; American School Health Association; Pan American Health Organization: Regional Office of the World Health Organization; American College of Sexologists; American Academy of Pediatrics; American Federation of Teachers; Interfaith Alliance Educational Foundation; National Association of Secondary School Principals; National Education Association; School Social Work Association of America; and American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (partial list).
Tomek, a young man from Poland with a US green card, is forced out as gay by his privacy-invading parents a few weeks before his 21st birthday. He is thrown out, and has to figure out where to sleep, eat, and how to go back to university in September--all of which is somewhat dangerous, and a very tight economic proposition. He needs a financial safety net, now.
THE STORY
I wish that summary was just another article you read in your local news, or just another story on TV. It isn't. It is very real and happening to one of my friends.
I don’t think many people know of the rug-pull that has happened with Tomasz Wojtasik's parents’ actions, or of his diligent efforts to gain lots of work hours, or how all of the compounded complex trauma of this and his growing up makes getting on with life a big hurdle.
Tomek has helped and raised funds for LGBTIQ2+ organizations. But I feel that those of us who are his friends and supporters ought to be raising some buffer funds for *him.* Understandably, he feels embarrassed by that, but I don’t feel there is any need to be. He is deeply grateful to his *chosen* family for their support throughout the transition, and thankful to still be able to talk with his siblings.
A fair number of Tomek's friends have known he is gay, but his parents and a significant portion of his support system did not. Tomek had been taking a year off of school to work through the stress of being gay and dealing with the kind of intense religious system his parents work in, living at home and working as many hours as he could pull at Starbucks.
When Tomek's parents recently began to go through his belongings and discovered a Valentine's Day card from his boyfriend, along with "reports" from other members of their religious group back in Boston, they discovered he is gay. They decided to make him choose between two terrible options.
The first option they gave him was to -- either in the US or back in Poland -- undergo "reparative conversion treatment" to become an "ex-gay" (Sexual Orientation Change Efforts -- condemned as abusive quackery by every major professional mental health, professional medical, and professional educational association, as you can see in the notes at the end).
The other option was to leave home immediately.
Tomek left.
His minimal Chicago support system has helped him with temporary housing, but he is still in need of a safe sublet, reasonably near work, until he returns to school in September. His tuition is paid by scholarship, but living expenses are based on what he can draw in from work. Just having turned 21, Starbucks is his best option right now. His parents provide no buffer, no base of funds, and no support. Tomek is a permanent US resident (Green card) in process of seeking citizenship, but he is therefore not eligible for most Federal and State support programs.
This is a story that gets played out far too often, and the pitfalls for the thrown away young gay person are numerous and, frankly, wind up making too many headlines.
Tomek's upper division advisor at college, Alyn Wallace, and I (Luke Adams) have put together this funding drive to try to provide Tomek with some kind of safety net. None of us should ever have to face this. Especially not because of an ideology that defies rationality and that is completely inhumane. We all deserve better, and faith demands we be better. We are asking you to dig deep and give what you can to help this one promising young man keep from falling through the cracks.
________________________
FOR THE RECORD
The professional organizations on record against SOCE: American Psychiatric Association; American Psychological Association; American Psychoanalytic Association; American Counseling Association; America Association for Marriage and Family Therapy; National Association of Social Workers; American College of Physicians; American Medical Association; National Association of School Psychologists; American School Counselor Association; American School Health Association; Pan American Health Organization: Regional Office of the World Health Organization; American College of Sexologists; American Academy of Pediatrics; American Federation of Teachers; Interfaith Alliance Educational Foundation; National Association of Secondary School Principals; National Education Association; School Social Work Association of America; and American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (partial list).
Fundraising team: Tomasz Closet-Free Launch Fund (2)
Luke Adams
Organizer
San Francisco, CA
Tomasz Wojtasik
Beneficiary
Alyn Wallace
Team member