Kim's Recovery Fund
Donation protected
Hi, friends! For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Kim. I'm 27 years old and currently reside in Connecticut. I graduated from Sacred Heart University in Fairfield, CT where I studied health sciences. I intend on returning to school in the future to pursue a career in healthcare, hopefully helping other men and women recovering from eating disorders.
I don’t often open up about my struggles with disordered eating, however, having to take an extended leave of absence from work coupled with the hefty medical bills, have been absolutely devastating, financially and psychologically. Though it makes me deeply uncomfortable, I come, hat in hand, asking you for help. All funds raised will go directly to paying off my medical debt. As hesitant as I am to post this, I have been encouraged by loved ones to share my story and hopefully receive aid to get back on my feet.
For those of you who do know me, it probably does not come as a surprise that I struggled with disordered eating all of my life. My weight has been at both ends up the spectrum, fluctuating as much as 150 pounds from my highest to lowest. As a child I was traumatically bullied for my larger size and turned to food as a coping mechanism. I suffered with binge eating, crippling anxiety and depression for many years before developing a severe case of anorexia nervosa in high school and I have been fighting ever since.
According to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) website, anorexia nervosa is "an eating disorder characterized by weight loss, difficulties maintaining an appropriate body weight for height, age, and stature; and, in many individuals, distorted body image. People with anorexia generally restrict the number of calories and the types of food they eat. Some people with the disorder also exercise compulsively, purge via vomiting and laxatives, and/or binge eat." Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness. Anorexia, specifically, has the highest death rate of any psychiatric illness (including major depression). I have lost a handful of friends that I met in treatment over the years. Though it’s been terrifying, I am beyond grateful to have been given a second chance at life and recovery.
My eating disorder took a turn for the worse once I entered high school and discovered how hurtful teenagers can be. What started as daily binging shifted to restricting drastically, sometimes not eating for days, abusing laxatives, working out excessively, tracking calories in/out in a notebook hidden under my bed, and eventually bingeing and purging. I was praised for my "dieting" results and it before I knew it, skinny was never skinny enough.
In college my behaviors worsened and I got to what was, at the time, my lowest weight. Again, my ED went unnoticed because I was a "healthy weight,” however, my behavior use was at an all-time high and I could not function in daily life. This is when I did my first residential stay at Renfrew in Philadelphia. I would later go back to Renfrew for a second two-month stay. This meant graduating a year late and racking up even more costs.
Life after college was manageable, but I was never truly free of behaviors and my weight continued to decline. In January of 2018, I entered residential treatment at Center for Discovery. My first night, I was admitted to the hospital for one week because of heart abnormalities. I spent a month in residential, followed by an extensive partial hospitalization program afterwards. This pattern of residential/PHP/hospitalizations for medical complications would continue for the next two years.
This time last year, I received a blessing in disguise. My extremely toxic relationship fell apart. The five long years of emotional, sexual, and verbal abuse by my partner derailed me, sending me into a full blown relapse. This year alone, I have been hospitalized two times, both of which they did not think I would survive.
I am currently in a virtual PHP and am finally making huge strides; I feel as though I have a new lease on life and want so desperately to move forward, leaving this all behind. However, I cannot do so with crippling financial hardships weighing me down.
I am so grateful for my support system—family, friends, my treatment team—and all the strong women and men I have met along the way. Recovering from an eating disorder is one of the hardest things I will ever do. Please reach out to me if you or someone you know is struggling. You are not alone.
Thank you for your time, your effort, and your compassion.
I don’t often open up about my struggles with disordered eating, however, having to take an extended leave of absence from work coupled with the hefty medical bills, have been absolutely devastating, financially and psychologically. Though it makes me deeply uncomfortable, I come, hat in hand, asking you for help. All funds raised will go directly to paying off my medical debt. As hesitant as I am to post this, I have been encouraged by loved ones to share my story and hopefully receive aid to get back on my feet.
For those of you who do know me, it probably does not come as a surprise that I struggled with disordered eating all of my life. My weight has been at both ends up the spectrum, fluctuating as much as 150 pounds from my highest to lowest. As a child I was traumatically bullied for my larger size and turned to food as a coping mechanism. I suffered with binge eating, crippling anxiety and depression for many years before developing a severe case of anorexia nervosa in high school and I have been fighting ever since.
According to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) website, anorexia nervosa is "an eating disorder characterized by weight loss, difficulties maintaining an appropriate body weight for height, age, and stature; and, in many individuals, distorted body image. People with anorexia generally restrict the number of calories and the types of food they eat. Some people with the disorder also exercise compulsively, purge via vomiting and laxatives, and/or binge eat." Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness. Anorexia, specifically, has the highest death rate of any psychiatric illness (including major depression). I have lost a handful of friends that I met in treatment over the years. Though it’s been terrifying, I am beyond grateful to have been given a second chance at life and recovery.
My eating disorder took a turn for the worse once I entered high school and discovered how hurtful teenagers can be. What started as daily binging shifted to restricting drastically, sometimes not eating for days, abusing laxatives, working out excessively, tracking calories in/out in a notebook hidden under my bed, and eventually bingeing and purging. I was praised for my "dieting" results and it before I knew it, skinny was never skinny enough.
In college my behaviors worsened and I got to what was, at the time, my lowest weight. Again, my ED went unnoticed because I was a "healthy weight,” however, my behavior use was at an all-time high and I could not function in daily life. This is when I did my first residential stay at Renfrew in Philadelphia. I would later go back to Renfrew for a second two-month stay. This meant graduating a year late and racking up even more costs.
Life after college was manageable, but I was never truly free of behaviors and my weight continued to decline. In January of 2018, I entered residential treatment at Center for Discovery. My first night, I was admitted to the hospital for one week because of heart abnormalities. I spent a month in residential, followed by an extensive partial hospitalization program afterwards. This pattern of residential/PHP/hospitalizations for medical complications would continue for the next two years.
This time last year, I received a blessing in disguise. My extremely toxic relationship fell apart. The five long years of emotional, sexual, and verbal abuse by my partner derailed me, sending me into a full blown relapse. This year alone, I have been hospitalized two times, both of which they did not think I would survive.
I am currently in a virtual PHP and am finally making huge strides; I feel as though I have a new lease on life and want so desperately to move forward, leaving this all behind. However, I cannot do so with crippling financial hardships weighing me down.
I am so grateful for my support system—family, friends, my treatment team—and all the strong women and men I have met along the way. Recovering from an eating disorder is one of the hardest things I will ever do. Please reach out to me if you or someone you know is struggling. You are not alone.
Thank you for your time, your effort, and your compassion.
Organizer
Kimberly Begg
Organizer
Stratford, CT