Help bekah get anorexia treatment

For so long I've pretended I've been ok, that my eating disorder is no longer bad , and well that's a lie. I don't know why I tried to cover it up for the most part. Most of it I guess has been shame and embarrassment. I think well I "should" be better by now I've been struggling with this for 14 years. Yes I have gone to treatment in the past to get help, but it was by force, it was never really my choice. This time it is my choice to finally destroy this demon. For the past year and a half I have been stuck in a nursing home , yes a nursing home being only 22-24 years old! Obviously it hasn't helped . I've been neglected, verbally abused and some other imaginable things have occurred. This place doesn't understand eating disorders, or trauma / ptsd, suicidality, depression or anxiety. They don't understand my chronic illnesses of gastroparesis, POTS , seizures or ehlers-Danlos syndrome either. And I've been sinking, it seems so even faster lately. I've been talking with my therapist for weeks about trying treatment and I'm ready. The part that sucks is when I'm finally ready , and a place is willing to take me with all these complex medical issues , insurance refuses to pay for any more eating disorder treatment, which I can't really blame them because it's always been the same outcome because I wasn't ready, I was forced to go. So I have to try and come up with funds on my own to save my life. I feel guilty even asking anyone to donate because I probably don't deserve it. But I finally desperately want it. If anyone can help in anyway I'd greatly appreciate it, you are helping me save my life so I can in turn help save others lives. If you have any questions feel free to text, email, message me. And again, thank you . I'm blessed to know so many amazing people.