The Next Step

This summer, my world got turned upside down: as most of you probably know, I was in Los Angeles this August shooting an independent film:

And Then There Was Eve

I play Eve.

It's the proverbial "left-turn at Albuquerque" and one of those things that you ignore at your peril and regret until the end of days.

I love acting. It's my favorite thing in the whole wide world, but... I thought that part of my life was done (I'd convinced myself that my acting career was the price I had to pay to transition, so I paid it).

To fill that void I've been busy making other things like websites and photos and videos and just generally learning how to live and be creative in a small town in the Midwest and that all worked too. But...

At the beginning of 2016 I was offered an Artist-in-Residency at The Refuge here in Appleton because I've been actively trying to figure out what my "next" was going to be.

 I thought it was going to be music but no, acting.

Boom. I'm in a film.


And now, I have a window of opportunity to re-invent my life in a very unexpected way... and I need to relocate to Los Angeles in January because that’s where all of this happens.

And I need some help to make that happen. 

(I'm not moving... I'm just making room for a bigger life)

The Deal:

I need about 10k to make 3 months in LA happen. I need to be there.

The Refuge Artist-In-Residence Fund has given me a $5,000 matching grant.

Which, because The Refuge is awesome, means every dollar you give is matched by them so hopefully at the end it means 10K.

The plan is simple: take advantage of this opportunity and be a working artist again.

$5,000 is my goal.

If you'd like to get something in return for your cold, hard cash - which I totally get - then I can make pictures of you and yours. Really nice ones, too.

I can make Headshots  which are just useful as hell or, I can make Portraits  which are, in my not so humble opinion, genuinely beautiful and basically my favorite things I've ever made outside of performance.

Or, if you want to go nuts because you have this super cool idea... I'll shoot it (if possible). Making pictures is one of my favorite things.

Also, the holidays are upon us and older folks (I know a couple) like getting framed photos as presents. I'm not saying I'm gonna frame a photo of you for grandma, but I'm not saying I wont. 

Other than that... um, the satisfaction in being an advocate for me?

But yeah, that's it: I'm heading west to roll the dice (with a sensible plan and set of expectations because I'm almost a grown-up) and I need your help.

Acting is the thing I'm supposed to do. I think it's the thing I'm best at. And I know that I'm the most alive when acting is part of my day and now, because of this film and this, um, interesting world we live in...

I have a chance. A shot.*

:)

The Backstory
---
New Years Day, 2016

A few hours after delivering a very large order of Kentucky Fried Chicken to an obviously hungover collection of bands and their loved ones (it was this lovely, communal gathering of likeminded, slightly-hungover souls ready to put on a show for each other... after a night of doing shows for other people), Cory Chisel offered me an Artist-in-Residency slot at The Refuge.**

This meant that I would get a room. Of my own. At this former monastery where creative people were already making things. To realize a long-held dream of writing an album’s worth of songs.

I didn't tell very many people about it. It was like this private place to explore the idea re-orienting my life to where I thought of myself as an artist first, and whatever my day job was second.


It became this place to dream again and to start exploring the idea of what my “next” was actually going to be. So I did. I showed up after a day’s work (with a side-trip to home to feed the cats) more often than not from March to July. 

And I started to make song-like things which were turning into an album and I thought that was going to be my next.

(It's still happening: "Others" - a collaborative album out in 2017 - Refuge produced-and-born. Holla!)

Oh man, I loved that room… and then the genie-in-the-bottle that is my acting career made a dash for escape and won.

I got a leading role in an indie film. 


A world of opportunity I had thought long-gone all of a sudden opened up to me: I could act again!

The world had grown up a lot while I'd been away and now transfolk are taking active action in being involved with the telling of our stories and I want to be a part of that.

I can be a part of that.

When I moved to Appleton I really tried to NOT talk about my acting career. It was both too complicated (you could see people go, "Why did this lady play Henry V?") and it was too hard to think about.

It took something like becoming an Artist-in-Residence at The Refuge and the creative energy that is growing there that me aware of the possibilities I had. The idea that I could be an artist first and foremost in my life rather than a hobby.

And so I auditioned for a film almost as a lark, got the role, and changed the trajectory of my life.

Now I’m ready to take the next step.

Thank god for KFC. ;)

- End History (for now...)

*Of course I went there. I also have no intention of wasting mine.

**I cannot overstate how important The Refuge has been to me this year. That initial vote of confidence is foundational to my story.